Review Detail of neobenmike in Reincarnated in Star Wars The System
Review detail
Writing quality is good, story development is somewhat cringy with creepy pedobear vibes, character design sucks specially with the mc, mc is cringy and a creep. Another system with a mind of its own fic with wank fic tone
Reincarnated in Star Wars The System
Gray_stone3
Liked by 21 people
LIKEReplies68
Yeah sure, the part where its sentience is being presented and implied just goes over your head, cut the BS
InterPlanarGod:dude.... the system hasnt said anything since he plopped him into the world. cut the BS
The pedo vibes came from the part where he has designs for a young flesh, implied, but I am sure he will wait till she is 18, specially since considering the mc is an *****. So by then the vibe will become a dirty old man vibe lol
shiro_43:Where the f did you get pedo XD
Never specified the age of the Mc. So he is not a pedo. The age of Padmé and the rest of the girls are 14 and up, so with the fact that the MC was early teens or at least 18 before he died, makes it ok. People have dated a lot younger than that age gap.
neobenmike:The pedo vibes came from the part where he has designs for a young flesh, implied, but I am sure he will wait till she is 18, specially since considering the mc is an *****. So by then the vibe will become a dirty old man vibe lol
That is why I placed pedo vibes rather than straight up pedophilia, since the *****(mc) has designs for a younger flesh rather than getting a boner. Also, I suggest editing out the "People have dated a lot younger than that age gap", since that can be misunderstood as a 40 y/o dating a 12 y/o or any age gap that can go inline with pedophilia and since that is one of the excuses or "justification" pedophiles often use. As I am thinking that isn't what you mean by that sentence. Or you can add more context to that.
Gray_stone3:Never specified the age of the Mc. So he is not a pedo. The age of Padmé and the rest of the girls are 14 and up, so with the fact that the MC was early teens or at least 18 before he died, makes it ok. People have dated a lot younger than that age gap.
The age gap meant further down the line it wonât matter when they in their 20âs and 30âs, even 10 year gap is fine. Another thing......this is fictional writing. Absolutely nothing about it is real. I just want to make sure you know that.
neobenmike:That is why I placed pedo vibes rather than straight up pedophilia, since the *****(mc) has designs for a younger flesh rather than getting a boner. Also, I suggest editing out the "People have dated a lot younger than that age gap", since that can be misunderstood as a 40 y/o dating a 12 y/o or any age gap that can go inline with pedophilia and since that is one of the excuses or "justification" pedophiles often use. As I am thinking that isn't what you mean by that sentence. Or you can add more context to that.
It is not hard to see this is a work of fiction so don't worry, what I am pointing out are things that might make readers uncomfortable, assuming that you're writing for the readers, as this work of fiction is made public. That is why clarifications are important specially on readers that is not well versed on the lore of the source material. Using expositions is one way or using subtle hints through dialogue is another. All literary works are fueled by ones imaginations and majority of those touched by the internet will go to, more often than not, the negative side depending on the execution of your work and word choices. Hence my review as I perceived your work to be, I can point out what made my review as such but I think I already pointed majority in my replies
Gray_stone3:The age gap meant further down the line it wonât matter when they in their 20âs and 30âs, even 10 year gap is fine. Another thing......this is fictional writing. Absolutely nothing about it is real. I just want to make sure you know that.
neobenmike:It is not hard to see this is a work of fiction so don't worry, what I am pointing out are things that might make readers uncomfortable, assuming that you're writing for the readers, as this work of fiction is made public. That is why clarifications are important specially on readers that is not well versed on the lore of the source material. Using expositions is one way or using subtle hints through dialogue is another. All literary works are fueled by ones imaginations and majority of those touched by the internet will go to, more often than not, the negative side depending on the execution of your work and word choices. Hence my review as I perceived your work to be, I can point out what made my review as such but I think I already pointed majority in my replies
Yeah but your views were clearly unliked and many did not agree. So your âopinionâ isnât pointing out anything really. It just seems like your randomly writing something negative that no one really care about.
neobenmike:It is not hard to see this is a work of fiction so don't worry, what I am pointing out are things that might make readers uncomfortable, assuming that you're writing for the readers, as this work of fiction is made public. That is why clarifications are important specially on readers that is not well versed on the lore of the source material. Using expositions is one way or using subtle hints through dialogue is another. All literary works are fueled by ones imaginations and majority of those touched by the internet will go to, more often than not, the negative side depending on the execution of your work and word choices. Hence my review as I perceived your work to be, I can point out what made my review as such but I think I already pointed majority in my replies
You seem to have read my review and replies in a negative perspective, My opinion is to the readers, the point being whether or not they will enjoy reading something or not. Why do I care? because people does not have the same cup of tea For you to see my review and replies as something negative is on you. I thought we are having a dialogue regarding your work but it is apparent that you have seen it as an argument instead. *smh No need to reply to this as you have proven that I have wasted enough time and words with you. It's not you, it's me, I'm the bad man here, whatever see you never.
Gray_stone3:Yeah but your views were clearly unliked and many did not agree. So your âopinionâ isnât pointing out anything really. It just seems like your randomly writing something negative that no one really care about.
Thatâs a weird way to end a convo, but whatever. I do see your words as negative because they were. Even the actual readers saw it as wrong and negative.
neobenmike:You seem to have read my review and replies in a negative perspective, My opinion is to the readers, the point being whether or not they will enjoy reading something or not. Why do I care? because people does not have the same cup of tea For you to see my review and replies as something negative is on you. I thought we are having a dialogue regarding your work but it is apparent that you have seen it as an argument instead. *smh No need to reply to this as you have proven that I have wasted enough time and words with you. It's not you, it's me, I'm the bad man here, whatever see you never.
Thatâs a weird way to end a convo, but whatever. I do see your words as negative because they were. Even the actual readers saw it as wrong and negative.
neobenmike:You seem to have read my review and replies in a negative perspective, My opinion is to the readers, the point being whether or not they will enjoy reading something or not. Why do I care? because people does not have the same cup of tea For you to see my review and replies as something negative is on you. I thought we are having a dialogue regarding your work but it is apparent that you have seen it as an argument instead. *smh No need to reply to this as you have proven that I have wasted enough time and words with you. It's not you, it's me, I'm the bad man here, whatever see you never.
No offense, but Americans from my experience with theme like to stick there noise to what doesn't concern them, I repeat no offense.
neobenmike:*You're No I'm not American but I am curious why you asked
Supreme_Devil:No offense, but Americans from my experience with theme like to stick there noise to what doesn't concern them, I repeat no offense.
I apologize but I can't understand your message, what is making you uncomfortable? what is, this? like the reply or me or both? or the contents of the review or reply?
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