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ReincarnatedSaint
ReincarnatedSaintAuthor4yr
2020-02-04 02:13

I am here to follow the tradition. I have edited my story and posted it again after improving it. There will be many characters as I have planned to introduce as story progresses. While the world building will become very clear as the story moves. While I have tried to make the system very clear to the earlier one and a bit less OP.

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Replies18
DeVoided
DeVoidedLv15

Any romance

ReincarnatedSaint
ReincarnatedSaintAuthor

Yup... It will take it's time though. I won't rush it.

DeVoided:Any romance
Void_Hawk
Void_HawkLv3

I'm not a renowned author, but POV's are like a short story or someone's emotions/feelings inside a story. But here it's everywhere. Not a healthy way of writing.

ReincarnatedSaint
ReincarnatedSaintAuthor

I am new to it. And I have already learned my lesson. You won't find any Pov in later chapters

Void_Hawk:I'm not a renowned author, but POV's are like a short story or someone's emotions/feelings inside a story. But here it's everywhere. Not a healthy way of writing.
Chaos_Prime
Chaos_PrimeLv15

Is this a harem if u can make it only one person instead of harem will appreciated

ReincarnatedSaint:I am new to it. And I have already learned my lesson. You won't find any Pov in later chapters
ReincarnatedSaint
ReincarnatedSaintAuthor

It's not a harem

Chaos_Prime:Is this a harem if u can make it only one person instead of harem will appreciated
Chaos_Prime
Chaos_PrimeLv15

Thx appreciated 👍👍

ReincarnatedSaint:It's not a harem
Chaos_Prime
Chaos_PrimeLv15

Thx appreciated 👍👍

ReincarnatedSaint:It's not a harem
Chaos_Prime
Chaos_PrimeLv15

Thx appreciated 👍👍

ReincarnatedSaint:It's not a harem
Chaos_Prime
Chaos_PrimeLv15

Thx appreciated 👍👍

ReincarnatedSaint:It's not a harem
Nikhil_Chand
Nikhil_ChandLv4

Will it be just romance or harem?

ReincarnatedSaint:Yup... It will take it's time though. I won't rush it.
ReincarnatedSaint
ReincarnatedSaintAuthor

Romance, I am not a fan of harem. But if readers demand for it. I will consider a bit

Nikhil_Chand:Will it be just romance or harem?
Nikhil_Chand
Nikhil_ChandLv4

If it's a novel with less than 500 chapters then no harem is fine. But if this novel aims to have 1k chapters+ then i would recommend harem as it would have more possibilities

ReincarnatedSaint:Romance, I am not a fan of harem. But if readers demand for it. I will consider a bit
peaceful_asura
peaceful_asuraLv3

That's a relief.I guess I will give a try.

ReincarnatedSaint:It's not a harem
Prapti_Karmakar
Prapti_KarmakarLv3

I am following this story for quite some time can you push up the release rate it will be appreciated

ReincarnatedSaint
ReincarnatedSaintAuthor

I will try.....actually I am trying...but its difficult to focus on one thing for too long...u end up getting bored....I am currently writing 2 stories...I will try to improve the update rate....and u can anticipate the new story coming any time.....I have no idea when I will publish it

Prapti_Karmakar:I am following this story for quite some time can you push up the release rate it will be appreciated
gggqq_8280
gggqq_8280Lv14

will there be same romance? i can maybe see something between man and lisa(after chapter 280 and one or two below 280)

its_L
its_LLv3

author san is it a harem or not ? and it will be appreciated if there is no vague answer and it's already 600+ chapters so u should have made up ur mind by now to which direction it should go PLZZ reply asap so I can start reading

Other Reviews
Chryiss
ChryissLv5

To be bluntly honest and direct, the rating of 3 about sums up my opinion of this story—it’s average. After reading through 9 chapters, I wasn’t impressed nor was I repulsed. Just neutral. This story is like a skeleton that has a lot of room for improvement. It’s the basic litrpg story notion without much differentiation from any other litrpg’s. Writing Quality: Average Update Stability: Great Story Development: Below Average Character Design: Below Average World Background: Average Firstly, writing. Your English grammar is actually quite fair. No obvious awkward phrasings to note with verb tenses mainly correct. My only qualm is the punctuation. Several sentences need commas badly to make the syntax correct. And the spaces before and after commas and quotations is seriously bugging me. This is a personal little “itch” of mine whenever I see those incorrect spaces. It just doesn’t make for a pleasant reading experience. Writing style wise, it’s basically nonexistent. But as I’ve said to others, writing style is a work in a progress that develops the more you write. But your story can definitely benefit from more detail, emotion, and vocabulary. Currently, this is written as a basic web serial. Story development and character design. The first chapter was confusing. I think you made a typo with Mark Edwinson instead of Max. The repeated going to the awakening ceremony was confusing and not very engaging. It didn’t add anything to the story when you could’ve jumped right to the issuing of the gene system. All that failed awakening info can just be part of the background story for the MC. The story also drags with no much interesting conflict. I can’t see where the plot is going except for getting stronger. I understand many litrpgs are like this, but usually there is still some motivating goal for the MC to become powerful. So far, the MC doesn’t demonstrate any individuality or personality. This is further emphasized by the first person narrative. Stay away from first person narrative. It can easily get messy and confusing if you ever switch perspectives. And the principle reason for using first person is to deliver any in-depth view or insight into the speaker. This was not accomplished. In fact, you could’ve easily made this story in third person, and nothing would be lost. If you want first person, then you’ll need to improve on the narrative thought process. What does the MC feel and think? How does his actions confirm or contradict his inner thoughts? What’s his inner perspective that might not be outwardly expressed? This is what first person narrative should be used for conveying. A short bit to add onto character and writing. Instead of using caps to convey shouting, just use regular text and say that he’s shouting, like: “Damn it!” He/I shouted vehemently. Caps is unnerving and not pleasant to read. Only save caps for crucial moments and not for general shouting or cursing. Some story dialogue is unnecessary. Only include what is integral to the plot and reader’s comprehension. Not every spoken word by every character is needed. Think plot-first, what does this dialogue achieve for the story? Does it convey more of a character’s personality is besides what’s know? Does it spur forth anything conflict or reveal something important? World background is okay. Not much is described of the settings; the system details in place are sufficient though. Be careful of having too many numbers where your story becomes mainly stat screens and skills information. Plot first, always. In short, you have a lot of room for improvement, but you have the necessary English skills to back up what could become a very good story. Keep writing~!

Reached_The_Apex_
Reached_The_Apex_Lv10
LordInsanity
LordInsanityLv5
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CrimsonWolfAuthor · Fantasy
4.7
1114 Chs