Nice story It could have been more interesting if he had stayed in his original world. Also try to mellow down his attitude he seems less of a badass and more of a **** pissed at the world which he probably nis anyways but try to make him a cold and calculating personality that treats the rest of humankind as ants. That is an interesting villain persona. Either way good story. Has potential. If you have time do check out my story and drop a review too.
Moe_Cyan_Pile
Liked it!
LIKENo replies. Be the first!