Review Detail of Xreth in A New World of Magic

This is my first time writing. Forgive me for my ambition but I really wanted to make a living and breathing world where characters have their own stories that aren't just copy paste. There'd be tons of characters and introductions in the first few dozens of chapters as the universe slowly builds itself. Let me just warn you that main characters in this novel die and will die permanently unless something else happens so I'll make sure that there's someone you'll like and relate to so you'd support me well so I won't kill them off /s. Please give me feedback as I really want to improve my writing including my style. Thank you all!