[Reveiw from Ch 36.]
This Novel Should be called. " The Interfering Attention Seeker." Why? Let me explain. We have someone who finds himself in a new world, And then figures out he is in an anime. What does he do well the first moments of his life in this world. He on the spot decides to become the Villan? Why? There is no reason he just decides to be the villan of the Bleach story for no reason at all.
This is what makes a beta Villan in my books. And this Mc is a Japanese Beta in my mind, He has not motivation and what makes an effective villan is their motivation. The Mc dosen't have that.
And he has a system which makes him less intelligent and non inspiring from these aspects. I can tell the Authour has no goal and is on acid while using his Mc for the power trip. There is no plot in this story aswell.
Every single goddamn interaction and action the Mc makes is following canon, but he interferes with every important scene involving Ichigo, so he gets the protaginist spot light. The Menos invasion in the human world, Rukia being taken by her brother and Renji, The soul society rukia arc. Every single important event, This Beta ass interferes just for the spot light and to what prove that he is a villan.
Listen. And I mean listen, I've read my shares of novels on this site and I can tell you 80 percent of the Authours don't have the balls to create official terrifying villans, The only impulsive emotion you can bring out from readers on this site to make them hate your novel" Is for your Mc to get cucked" Why? Because the people on this site are possesive and want to feel in power and this is exactly what you need to understand about human beings when writing villans they have triggers.
And for you to create this Attention Seeking Villan is blashphemy and Humouring to me, because I could already categorize your work below Chinese fanfictions and that's making a point.
You have a Main character with no motivation thrown into a new world where he mysteriously can over power people, because of a system and I already know where you got this inspiration from. Xenoverse the game.
Everything works out for him, How? Don't know, Is he some sort of stalker who already knows the events and is just waiting for whenever Ichigos screen time just to pop in. Yep, That's what he is an Ichigo stalker who dosen't know what villanous actions to take besides looking for the next Ichigo route to follow.
Honestly, You are lazy and just following canon, but placing in your very ******* villany twists where he just steals the moments of every fucking thing. You didn't give him his own ambition to work to. What he will grow stronger then what? Play your petty manipulations in the story to make him seem more well cemented as a wannabe villan.
He has not done a single action which leads him to being someone hateful and the fact you also downgrade Aizen character making him seem manipulative when he is just someone pulled out from a cliche Pg rated Marvel comic makes me wonder. What is wrong with this site.
Fanfiction.net is good, because the authours are not afraid, despite having bad grammar and bad plotting. They atleast have the balls to do very terrible things, but your main character, no. You. You have no balls and no spice.
The only reason you make your character follow Ichigo has nothing to do with plot, but because you are narrow minded with no imagination, because the very moment Ichigo dies you don't know what else to right, because he is the main character.
This bull**** with. " Oh no I am going wait till you grow then when you are like the future self I know, then it will be the ultimate battle for Xp and Sp."
??? [ oh, please.] Go watch some hentai or some ****, Like seriously I request you do and fill your mind with filfthy thoughts to blackened your mental state. Why? Because the villans in those videos are real, I'm sorry do you read the garbage you write, because I do and judging by the later chapters and their shorten words. You are a lazy parasite
What your Main character does in 35 chapters. A villan in some hentai video gets his **** down in 4 seconds of rape. When your character has not done a single thing.
For future readers who are actually looking for a piece of fresh air. You will not find it here. this story is lighthearted and has nothing to do with villans. It's hopless and I've given up.
This a tale of an Attention Seeker with the Dragon Ball system in a bleach world doing child play villany.. I'm sorry thats the entire summary of this story.
Anyone saying, Sir this is to harsh, The Authour won't grow from this review. Shut up. Lietrally, Do you think I care wether he improves or not?
People write **** and don't put much thought into their writing.
[ But it's only a fanfiction, I am not even trying.]
Fanfiction or Original, The fact you never put any effort into your work shows your slotful nature. I don't care wether you improve or not, You wrote something and I critic it to my likings. I hate your novel, because you didn't deliver and here is the consequence of your actions.
If I were to rewrite this story. I would kill your main character and inlist a hentai villan into this story, because he will have ambition, sure it's unethical and morally unacceptable to Webnovels standards, but anything than your lowzy lazy Main character who gets **** no from his intelligence or hard work, but from a system that provides him everything.
Cut the system from his life and he is nothing more than an average human. With no powers. Do you understand? Without the system your Mc has no qualities to himself, He will be nothing more than a person day dreaming of being a villan. And do you realise that humans who actually day dream of killing people in my opinion is more sinister than your toad mc. Have a think about it, People are violent and they don't need some wannabe anime or event to be the dark ****ts I know they can be.
[ Delete this review. And I will just post it up again. After all I have taken the time out of my life to review this story. So, delete it and I will be just like your dumb protaginist an interfering attention seeker.]
