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Veronica8
Veronica8Lv55yr
2019-05-06 18:31

The start was nice and idyllic. I got the feeling Su Li was quite content with her ghost state and going with the flow. There were no surprises about her situation. Although she had some regrets, which is normal I guess. The host came across as a typical omniscient character. Although, I found it hard to determine when it was speaking as its dialogue was clumped in with the rest of the paragraph. You're paragraphs could probably be broken up a bit better, so it doesn't read like one big info dump. In a paperback book it's okay to have long chapters. On screen, long paragraph makes the eyes wander away from the story. Unfortunately, this tended to be the case for me. Best to keep paragraphs per action or point expressed. Otherwise, the story is a good start. Keep writing.

Quick Transmigration - Counter Attack Of Various Characters

Shiksha_Jerath
4.6
135 Chs

Liked by 1 people

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Replies2
Veronica8
Veronica8Lv5

You're paragraphs *your...

5yr
Shiksha_Jerath
Shiksha_JerathAuthor

I'll keep in mind about the paragraph length. After the first arc is over will go back and edit the chapters once again. Thanks for the review.

5yr
Other Reviews
Shiksha_Jerath
Shiksha_JerathAuthor

Heya everyone I really didn't want to review my own novel but am writing this to inform everyone the I have edited the first arc. Therefore, all the paragraph length problems and the few grammatical errors that were sprinkled here and there have also been solved. More than the paragraph length, I had been worried about any grammatical errors that I had made since am one of those Grammar Nazis lol Don't forget to read, review, recommend, vote and comment on the story. Those few things are infinitely sweeter than marshmallows to me 😁😂😛

5yr

Purplebutterfly
PurplebutterflyLv10

I am really enjoying the story very much. The idea of two ML's great and I just can't wait for more.!!!! Thumbs up to the Author!!! Keep up the good work.

5yr
yeon_
yeon_Lv5

Fufufu~ I wanted to give a review too 😗 It's hard to find a decent Quick transmigration novel with a female lead that I haven't read. Happy to find this gem~ Has stable updates and the plotline is progressing quite well, it has been only the first arc so far but I love it :p Keep doing you thing author-san!

5yr
Yuki_Qing
Yuki_QingLv14

Reveal spoiler

5yr
Archied
ArchiedLv5

3..2..1.. [It's review system here! Welcome to the review world!] Lol. I came here and intended to read your story from a writer perspective but then.. Boom! There I go reverted back to being just a reader that was lost in a good story! I didn't expect that I could find a good novel system here, this is a hidden gem. I'm anticipating for more chapter and improvement from the author.

5yr
Immovable087
Immovable087Lv5

Reveal spoiler

5yr
mad_guy_444
mad_guy_444Lv3

The novel has a very good concept of a female which is important for two men which are contrary of each other,the novel's author is very experienced and it is shown in quality of her novel,the synopsis is enough to understand how good the novel is.

5yr
RaeXy
RaeXyLv15

So amazing to stumble upon such a hidden gem. Really waiting for more. I actually like the world and characters. Can't wait for more updates

5yr
Scarlettbunny
ScarlettbunnyLv11

Reveal spoiler

5yr
KENTARO12100
KENTARO12100Lv4

Amazing work i really love the female protagonist Yu Yan and The Sistem, put those two and a great story you Will get a perfect novel, keep going i Will add yo my library for no lose any chapter in the future ...

5yr
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