Hello, your novel has been assessed and reviewed by Virtual Bookshelf.
A review excerpt is as follows:
Technical & Writing Style:
No real criticisms here. Your punctuation and grammar is correct throughout, and you use a variation of sentence structures to make it interesting. Your paragraphing is also well done. The dialogue too doesn’t dominate the character’s interactions and is interspersed with their thoughts, feelings, and gestures. You have good descriptions where necessary.
The only part that interrupted your consistency is the word “crèches” in chapter 4. While it means nursery, it is British and originally french, so it doesn’t fit in a Chinese novel. It’s ok to use the word nursery instead.
Characters:
Xueshan, Ren – Although the snow god’s proposal seems rather sudden, this isn’t uncommon for gods of all cultural myths to “love at first sight.” The differentiation of the “her own country’s gods were perfect gentlemen in comparison,” was nice. He has a good sense of humor, and she is likable and relatable in her struggles and concerns.
Shaonu – In chapter three, her declaration to ruin the couple is somewhat laughable for her as the antagonist; it’s typical of a jealous woman, but the way she speaks is rather fresh; although, it seems in general, that is how the gods speak here. “should demons in hell crack my bones to suck out the marrow, I will see them suffer first.” Even though she plays an integral part in spurring the initial predicaments, she’s somewhat of a forgettable character.
Chang-o, Pi-hsia-yuan-chun, the rest at the wedding – These names are rather unique btw, even for a Chinese name. The first two’s characters aren’t covered completed, but it is enough for the events at hand. .........(cont.)
The full review: https://virtualbookshelf.home.blog/2019/02/02/review-the-snow-gods-lost-daughter-charlotte8/
After three chapters, you may request to be assessed again.
Thank you, and the best of luck on your writing endeavors! :)
