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Review Detail of AdurnaK in Monster Integration

Review detail

AdurnaK
AdurnaKLv144yrAdurnaK

Grammar needs major reviewing including syntax, misplaced words and faulty proofreading (e.g. faulty words such as 'minister' instead of 'monster'). Please fix the grammar since as it is it is not worth going premium. Furthermore, descriptions lack depth and color. Needless repetition of simple words make the writing seem inept or deeply disrespectful to readers. Nonetheless, the story develops at an okay pace. There are no for the genre odd jumps in power and it is possible to feel how the protagonist starts understanding things better and develops his skills. Other relatively organic growth is seen as the MC gets to know more people and thus gets a better grip on both his immediate surroundings and the world. Interactions are often however bland surface level affairs, where little though seems to be given by the MC apart from if they gained something and if they like the other person. Rare is the moment when any reflections about motives are given. Speaking of motives, the MCs motives are a bland affair with little development. It seems like the author decided to do a Pokémon and just point them at a competition and then see what happens. That is fine for a start, but as the story progresses there is need of developing the why and the implications. That is not done. We see no added depth to the MC, nor do we see any growth. This is really too bad since the world the story takes place in seems like a marvel of magic and adventure, filled with interesting organisations with individual interests that still don't act like complete assholes. Additionally, the mix of magic and technology might make for interesting world-building and something to add depth to social structure (for example why are the organisations like they are), and it would be interesting to see a characters growth and exploration of this world.

altalt

Monster Integration

AnWan

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Replies2

Genesis_YT
Genesis_YTLv4Genesis_YT

minister integration first the minister of defence next the minister of budgets

Genesis_YT
Genesis_YTLv4Genesis_YT

minister integration first the minister of defence next the minister of budgets