Review Detail of NoUsername in Memory Fragments

Hello everyone! As you all can see, this is my first try writing here in webnovel, and the very first time I wrote a webnovel. I am sure that some might want a fast paced story which the author will publish at least almost everyday, but my style is kinda different. I update my stories once a week only, so that the story will be thought out carefully. I want my readers to have a good time reading my writings, and it will be my pleasure if I get to hear your feedback in case of the need for the room in improvement. It will not just help the progress of this story, but also it will improve the way I write. Thanks and have a good day!