Review Detail of Randominity in Technomancer: Genesis

WRITING QUALITY The writing is readable enough but still needs work. Lots of misplaced commas/semicolons dot the thing. Chapter-to-chapter quality is inconsistent as well. (BTW, you can spare me the "it's not yet edited" spiel; as I note below I can see the disclaimer just fine. It's nice to include but it doesn't at all excuse the mistakes.) STABILITY OF UPDATES Updates regularly enough for a good score here. Not much else to say here. STORY DEVELOPMENT/CHARACTER DESIGN/WORLD BACKGROUND These are intertwined, so I'll tackle them together. Let's talk about the first place you're selling your story: the synopsis. 3/4 of the thing is disclaimer, for one thing, which means I've learned almost jack crap about what to actually expect story-wise. For another, pick either "photographic memory" or "eidetic memory"; either you use the clear term or you use the one some people may have to look up. Putting both like that reeks of "iamverysmart"ism and a synopsis, among other things, should never condescend. Check out the most recent chapters in the Book of Authors resource if writing a good synopsis is that much of an issue, it should help. The setting appears bog-standard enough for what it is, nothing exceptional. All that the character's background seems to lend early on is some THIS CANNOT BE crap you'd expect from a villainous breakdown. Yes, that's great, you took basic high school physical sciences and can mention those concepts! I'm still not impressed with the character at all, though. When you pick a supposedly smart professional as your MC, you can't afford to just pay superficial lip service to their vocation; a real scientist and not just a science student should have a more plastic view of what's possible or not, for one thing. All-in-all, this novel's introductory chapters failed to impress me in any of these three dimensions and this is where the rating takes its biggest hit. VERDICT As you can see, this is a Chapter 15 review. I do not owe the novel any more of my time trying to make it work, but obviously some people do find the additional investment worthwhile and have rated it well. I am not one of them. Each reader should ultimately judge this for themselves.