webnovel
DeJeL
DeJeLLv156yr
2018-06-08 00:11

*Remember this review is based on the first 5 chapters* Constructive Criticism: Good plot, but can't really determine whether this is a story I'll enjoy based only on these chapters, feels like some of these chapters would work better as prologue chaps, (not the first,) However, since I haven't read that far, I can't say that with certainty.;,;. Also your world background does not make much sense to me, I understand the background of the game well enough to understand that's the world that seems more important to this novel, but I feel that both worlds are still lacking by a great amount. Positive Feedback: Good plot line and nice reactions.;,;. haven't noticed any grammatical errors nor fluency errors.;,;. Personal Feedback: I know not yet whether I will enjoy this book, but for those who will enjoy this story, it seems like it will be a good read. I will continue reading this at another time, and may or may not finish. Please, though, finish what you started here for your fans' sakes (or to spite the haters).;,;.

Tarros

Blahblahblahblah
4.0
10 Chs

Liked by 2 people

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Replies3
Blahblahblahblah
BlahblahblahblahAuthor

Would like to say thank you so much! Appreciate it. Yes, read the whole the story. :) See yah!

6yr
Blahblahblahblah
BlahblahblahblahAuthor

Feel free to point out my mistakesssss. Again, thank you :)

Blahblahblahblah:Would like to say thank you so much! Appreciate it. Yes, read the whole the story. :) See yah!
6yr
Blahblahblahblah
BlahblahblahblahAuthor

Thank you for your honest review. Could you please point that out to me? The one that confused you, try my best to fix it.

Blahblahblahblah:Would like to say thank you so much! Appreciate it. Yes, read the whole the story. :) See yah!
6yr
Other Reviews
UnrivaledSolicitor
UnrivaledSolicitorLv12

Good start so far! Even though it’s only a chapter the set up is intriguing enough to garner attention! Good luck on your novel, hopefully everything goes as plan. Also, for your 3rd language, there was less gramatical errors than the average native English speaker lol. Minor fluidity and grammar mistakes but nothing a proofreader can’t fix!

6yr

Leialeial
LeialeialLv10

Reveal spoiler

6yr
passerbyreader
passerbyreaderLv4

I think this will be good but it seems like the update is not stable. Looking forward to your work with your newly found editor ~ Keep up the good work! Hope to see more chapters! 👋

6yr
Webnovel_Dao_Wuya
Webnovel_Dao_WuyaLv4

Very good novel!!!!! Can't wait to read more. The story is intriguing and catchy. Please have a steady release. Anyways, good job!

6yr
Calpis
CalpisLv12

Might be good who knows yet though. Might be good who knows yet though. Might be good who knows yet though.Might be good who knows yet though.

6yr
Endingleaves
EndingleavesLv15

The writing is a lil' bit confusing at some parts but nothing dramatic. The story development is confusing as there isn't a clear line between the past, present and future. And the story transition between different event whithout been clear on what it's happening but maybe it's intended? but the result is that we don't know what's happening and what the author want's us to understand. Anyway, can't say much about the characters as i don't have much data but the MC seems like a good guy (except for the killing of billions of people). The world background looks promising. Earth disaster by global climate changing and a Virtual Game to save it... looking forward it. keep going on!

6yr
Jaegeral
JaegeralLv4

A novel with a solid plot. Starts out pretty cliche but manages to distinguish itself from other novels of it's trope after a few chapters. Though the grammar and punctuation would need a bit of improvement. You'll find some sentences awkward to read, but the rest of the story is done well. It just requires a bit of polishing. Cheers!

6yr
yuhyeenie
yuhyeenieLv4

Reveal spoiler

6yr
AuHNG
AuHNGLv4

Exposition dump, in the beginning, too lazy to read, but anyway, the premise has been done before. Despite English being, your third language, it's quite decent. The plot is engaging enough, and I like the characters.

6yr
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