Overall, the story started off very well, but as the story went on, you could see the author's lack of sense of direction. He gave the protagonist a system only to take it away later, what's the reason? There is no logical explanation... Another point here that highlights this is that there has been a huge development in the system and its functions of 'picking up' girls. Anyway, apart from the story's lack of direction, there is the protagonist's unconsciousness. He doesn't have the same depth as all the other characters. If he is going to read it, he reads it at his own risk. But I don't recommend it, as it will waste valuable time that you could spend on better stories or your personal life.
LuknameFanfics
Curtido por 33 pessoas
GOSTARI agree... just kidding. And everything was planned, at first, I just didn't know how to write the novel in a good way... it didn't go that well, but whatever, it went to this point and I'm glad it's going this way, because not like in the novel section, here there a lot of people that can help me improve my writing, they criticize me and tell me things I should write and improve, so, I'm very happy how this story is going~ Thanks for the review thought.
Lukname:I agree... just kidding. And everything was planned, at first, I just didn't know how to write the novel in a good way... it didn't go that well, but whatever, it went to this point and I'm glad it's going this way, because not like in the novel section, here there a lot of people that can help me improve my writing, they criticize me and tell me things I should write and improve, so, I'm very happy how this story is going~ Thanks for the review thought.
You are using a different account than the one you used to publish the story to reply to reviews for the story. It doesn't matter which one you created first; my point is that it's weird that you did so.
Lukname:bruh, that's my main account...