um first off, you just jump into the story and we don't even know the main character. who is this guy, what are his motivations, what year is it? don't put the intro in the description you dummy, write an actual first chapter and how the mc gets his powers and how he gets used to them and shit. goddamn
FrozenTide
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GOSTARFrozenTide:Dummy edge lord not all stories go exactly how you want them to. Just because you want everything first chapter doesn't mean it is gonna happen. Dont read it then.