FranzJuniver

dis rhyme... REALLY?!

Thanks for the feedback, this is my first novel on such Genre

Yes, yes she did lol. She has to because olden times require a ready succewwor for the throne

Love le novel, I have something similar, which I wrote personally. https://***.webnovel.com/book/songur-of-ixander_18687664805591205 Please continue on what you are working too :)

Yes, yes I am

Some constructive points. 1. I love the way you write. I have no opposition to it. Although the onomatopoeia can be managed, it's better and understandable as a layman's term. 2. I love how the story develops, but I like a quick-paced one. Not too quick though, as it may leave plot holes. 3. I notice the side stories, and side cliches and touches, I love how you describe the normality or how you describe the environment the character is in. 4. Build a better world for the novel. You decide how it be better. TBH I like the era the novel went through, and more TBHs, I did not like the theme or the focus of the novel, but this is one of those novels that caught my interest despite not being inside my scope of interest. Keep it up, and make the story better! In a bigger picture though I cannot judge as I have only read a quarter of chapters, but I'm liking it frankly.

This is what I mean by subtlety of expression, and the description of feels.

Just buy a new one next time.

PISHBOL, How I miss eating some if everything was to open!

A typical replacement for the real swear word LOL