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The Wife (Book 1)

Urbano
Contínuo · 52.3K Modos de exibição
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Sinopse

It's something I've always wanted to do: be his wife. Despite his refusal to marry the two of us, he did nothing but carry out his parents' wishes. Nonetheless, I believe he will come to love me as much as I love him. I've adored him since then and will continue to do so. That was how insane I was with him. Even though it's an unrequited love, being his wife is a dream come true. Will my outpouring of love for him, however, bring me happiness, or will I eventually find it in his brother?

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Chapter 1Chapter 1

Ang maging asawa niya ay ang matagal ko ng pinangarap, kahit na tutol siya sa aming kasal ay kinulit ko ang aking mga magulang na pakasal sa kanya at sa huli ay pumayag rin siya. Natututunan naman ang magmahal at alam kong matututunan niya rin akong mahalin tulad ng pagmamahal ko sa kanya.

Minahal ko siya noon pa, simula elementarya, sekondarya pati kolehiyo, ganun nalang siguro ang pagkabaliw ko sa kanya.

Mahal ko parin siya kahit ang tingin niya sa akin ay basura, alipin, kasambahay, o maging pulubi man ganyan na siguro ako katanga.

Mahal ko siya kahit hindi niya ako kayang tratuhin bilang kanyang asawa, mahal ko siya kahit binubogbog niya ako o kahit na manipulahin na pa ako. Mahal ko siya hanggang sa huling hininga ko. Hindi niya alam kung ano ang aking nakatagong lihim, isang lihim na itinatago ko lamang sa aking sarili at kahit na malaman niya man ito ay alam kong wala rin siyang pakialam, hayaan niya lamang akong mahalin siya at papalayain ko rin naman siya sa tamang panahon.

Being his wife is a dream even though its an unrequited love.

***

Hingal na hingal ako habang naglalakad at tumatakbo para lang makaalis sa lugar na iyon. Bakit ba kasi nagsuot pa ako nitong high heels at above-knee dress, pinaghandaan ko ngayong gabi. Pinili ko ang damit na ito para sa kanya ngunit bakit nga ba ako agad naniwala ulit sa kanya? Hindi na nga talaga ako nadala. Kahit alam kong uulit-ulitin niya, niloko niya ako bago niya ako tiyak na pagtataksilan ulit. I was making myself a fool as I keep trusting him again and again. Kasalanan ko kung bakit hinayaan niya akong sirain ulit. Kasalanan ko naman ito lahat kung hindi lang sana ako naging marupok sa kanya, madali lang atang tibagin ang mga ginawa kong harang sa kanya sa puso ko.

"Alana!" sigaw niya habang hinahabol ang hiningang tumatakbo sa direksyon ko.

"Bumalik ka doon, Knight!" pabalik kong sigaw. Ayokong makita ang kanyang pagmumukha ni kahit pagdapo ng kanyang balat sa akin ay nasusuka ako. Ayokong hawakan niya ako.

"Mali ang iniisip mo!" sabi niya, at nagulat ako ng malapit na siya sa akin, hinawakan niya ang braso ko. Hinila ko ang braso ko mula sa pagkakahawak niya pero masyado siyang malakas para sa akin. Napakalakas niya at walang ring saysay kahit anong hila ko sa kamay ko.

"It's not what I think?! Please Knight enough with the lies! Please I can't help this anymore, I can't take it any longer, it hurts it really, really hurts here," I said about my feelings and bursted to tears, I cried in front of him, I cried all the pain I have kept for years. Taon narin pala akong naging gaga at tanga.

"I thought we were fine, I thought everything was already fine, akala ko nagsisimula na ulit kami ngunit akala ko lang pala iyong lahat, my fucking damn delusional thoughts you are giving me Knight!" iyak kong sigaw at akma na sana siyang lalapit nang umatras ako. Ayoko ng hawakan niya pa akong muli.

"Huwag na huwag mo na akong yayakapin Knight!" I shouted that shocked him, ito ang kauna-unahang pagkakataon na marinig ang paglaban ko sa kanya.

"Alana please, let's start again," he pleaded and the tone of his voice was in obvious of sadness and hurt but I won't be move again with his emotions, he did it before he can do it again. Huwag ka ng gaga Alana, nasaktan ka na ng ilang beses mas tanga ka pa sa tanga kung tatanggapin mo uli siya.

"I want to file an annulment," I firmly said, and I was so proud of myself because of my braveness and his grip loss. Nabigla siya sa mga salitang binitawan ko kahit ako rin ay nagulat sa mga sinabi ko.

I loved him with all my heart, body and even my soul, I married him but I can't blame him I am the one who wants this, I am the only one who wants this but maybe this is the time and sign to let go.

"No please, no no no please," he kneeled pleading, I can't believe that an Alcantara Knight is begging and kneeling in front of me.

"Goodbye Knight," I said and pulled the ring in my finger and give it back to him.

***

ALANA

Nanginig ang buong katawan ko sa takot na buksan ang pinto para sa kanya. He was banging and shouting against the door again. He was drunk.

"Bitch! Hindi mo ba bubuksan ang pintong ito o hihintayin mong wasakin ko itong pintong ito sa mukha mo?!" sigaw niya ng malakas.

"I'm coming, please wait," humihingal kong sagot. Nanginginig ang buong katawan ko sa takot habang papalapit ako sa pinto. At nang buksan ko ang pinto, sinalubong ako ng maitim niyang aura. Ang nag-aapoy niyang mga mata na puno ng galit at bigla kong napadpad sa sahig hawak-hawak ang namumuong pisngi ko. Isang malakas na sampal ang dumapo sa pisngi ko na hindi ko na maramdaman sa sakit. Immune na yata ang katawan ko at sanay na sa ganito. Tatayo na sana ako nang makaramdam ako ng kirot... ang paa ko.

Na dislocate ata ang paa ko. Napaiyak ako sa sakit na lalong ikinagalit niya dahilan para hilahin niya ang aking buhok na tila ba makukuha na ito sa anit ko sa sakit.

"Ano? Iiyak ka na naman ba?!" marahas niyang sigaw malapit sa tenga ko dahilan para mapapikit na lang ako at malayang umaagos ang mga luha ko sa mga mata. Dapat ay immune na ako sa ganitong sitwasyon pero tila ba hindi parin natututo ang katawan at puso ko sa lahat.

Hanggang kailan?

Kailan ba niya matututunang mahalin ako bilang asawa niya?

Ganun ba kahirap para sa kanya na mahalin ako? Ano bang ginawa ko para maging ganyan na lamang ang galit niya sa akin.

"Dahil sayo, dahil sayo, yung babaeng dapat nasa posisyon mo, dapat asawa ko, wala dito yung gusto ko, yung mahal ko! Ano bang ginamit mong gayuma o kulam sa mga magulang ko to agree for our fucking marriage?!" sigaw niya na mas hinigpitan pa ang paghatak sa buhok ko.

Wala akong sapat na boses para sagutin siya. Naging ritwal sa bahay na ito ang paggawa nito sa akin. Namamanhid ang katawan ko at nasanay na pero ang puso ko ay hindi. Sa parte ng katawan ng tao tila puso ata ang pinakataksil sa lahat.

"Please," iyon lang ang nasabi ko habang humihinga sa sakit.

"You slut!" sigaw niya pero bago pa niya matanggal ang kamay niya sa buhok ko isang malakas na sampal ang dumapo sa mukha ko at tinulak ako na parang basura. Oo, parang basura na nga talaga ang tingin niya sa akin. Na para bang nakakdiri akong tignan at hawakan.

Umindayog siya habang naglalakad papunta sa kwarto namin. Iniwan niya akong tulala at pumuputok sa sakit. Nabalot ng katahimikan ang silid hanggang sa muling tumahimik, isang katahimikan na dapat ay isang kaligayahan, kaligayahan ng isang asawa, asawa at isang sanggol ngunit hindi. Napangiwi ako sa sakit habang sinusubukan kong bumangon. Ganito ang routine ko tuwing gabi. I want to cry but it seems my eyes won't deliver tears, my body is weak, I have a cried a day, but the pain was still there.

Ano bang ginawa ko para matanggap ko ang lahat ng ito? Minahal ko siya, pero bakit ang hirap para sa kanya na mahalin ako? Ilang taon na ang lumipas, ngunit iniisip pa rin niya ito. Tumitibok pa rin ang puso niya para sa kanya. Mahal niya pa rin ang babaeng iyon kahit na mag-asawa na kami. Akala ko natutunan na niya akong mahalin noong pumayag siya sa kasal namin pero nagkamali ako, umakto siya na mahal niya ako sa harap ng mga magulang namin ngunit kapag kami na lang, umarte siya na parang walang nangyari. Naging malamig at malupit siya. Ibang Knight ang nakita ko.

I curled up like a ball and close my eyes as the wind caress my cheeks hoping that this is all just a nightmare. Ngunit bigla kong minulat ang aking mga mata at isang luhang tumakas nang makita kong totoo ang lahat ng ito. Nandito na sana ang mga magulang namin para umarte siya ulit, na mahal niya ako at kung paano niya ako inaalagaan, kahit nagpapanggap lang siya. Kahit sa pagpapanggap lang, naramdaman ko ang pagmamahal. Pero niloloko ko lang ang sarili ko kung iisipin ko ang mga isiping iyon. Ginagawa kong tanga ang sarili ko.

Flashback

"Magbihis ka, darating ang mga magulang natin," matigas na sabi niya habang minamasahe ang kanyang noo.

"Dito?" mahinang tanong ko at dahan-dahan kong nakita kung namuti ang kanyang mga buko-buko sa kamay at mga ugat sa kanyang braso sa pagporma ng kanyang kamao.

"Just go fucking dress!" he shouted that I took a step back, afraid. At first, he was so gentle after we just got married and he was so happy telling his parents how grateful he is that I'm now his wife. Maybe he was just stress and have problems in the company that is why he acts this way, maybe later he will go to normal again.

I choose a modest dress and fix myself, I put a little cream sa kung saan may pasa ilang araw naring ganito ito pero hanggang ngayon ay di parin gumagaling, baka walang bisa ang cream na ito sa akin.

I heard a beep of a car, a sign that our parents are here. I hurriedly peak on our window and saw Knight opened the gate and let them in. His parents were full of smiles as they get out of the car and there was no trace of sight of my parents, maybe they were all busy with their new build company.

Knight welcomed them with a genuine smile and kiss his mother and embrace his father, which cause me to put a smile on my lips. This was again the first that I saw him smile. He never smiled when we were alone.

I hurriedly walk at a life-size mirror and take a look of myself. My eyes reflected a true pretender, blue eyes. It was good enough that I woke up early and cook their favorite food to eat, beefsteak with potatoes, it was his favorite but his mother told me not to tell him that she had told me his favorites. As soon as I walk down stairs a tight hug embrace me, it was his mom.

"My beautiful Alana, how are you?" she squeaked in excitement and full of happiness.

"Were completely fine mom and-" I wasn't able to finish my words when she cuts me off.

"So are you two already making some babies?" she whispered, which makes my face turned red in shyness. I didn't have the power to answer her, but she just winked at me and slyly smiled. She's so adorable. Katulad din siya ni mama.

"You two will go to San Francisco for a honeymoon," she said as she winked at me for the second time.

"San Francisco?" Knight suddenly asked.

"Yes dear, San Francisco, isn't it fantastic? You'll love it there, I swear. That is where the place me and your Dad made you," she giggled as Knight just rolled his eyes off. I don't know, but I felt rejected and in pain, again. Doesn't he want us to be together? Doesn't he like the idea of his parents?

"We don't need to mom," he answered coldly and turn his heels into the kitchen.

"Don't mind him, Alana, maybe he is just thinking about the whole expenses," she laughs even though I know the whole reasons already. Alam ko naman kung bakit at di na dapat ako mag expect na tatanggapin niya ito, it was so good to be true.

We were sitting and enjoying our food when his dad breaks the silence.

"Alana, is Knight taking good care of you?" he asked while looking at Knight who is busy drinking his water.

"Yes, Knight is taking wonderful care of me, you don't have to worry about it dad," I answered and was startled when Knight seized a kiss on my cheek and was smiling at me that I instantly return his gesture. I can't help myself not to go red.

"I love you," he says which causes me to smile, a real smile but it slowly vanished when I remember that this was all a show. Kahit ngayon lang makita ko na mag-asawa kami, ganito pala ang pakiramdam, ganito pala ang iamhe ng may asawang nagmamahal sayo.

"Oh look at my son," his mom exclaimed that she could almost cry in our scene.

"Look at our son honey, he was just a baby, and I used to kiss him and tell how I love him and now he is a grown-up man with a beautiful woman. So when will I see my apo or apos?" she hyper asked that earned us laughs.

It was just days ago when his parents come here, but why is it still we were in the same situation? Did I do a big mistake? A wind touches my skin that I can no longer feel the coldness and I found myself asleep, deep in thoughts and pain.

I hope this will be gone just like a dream, a dream that I first thought from the first place.

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