The rat race

I swayed back and forth onto the balcony. The wind was blowing gently and the whisky in my bottle sloshed with each step. After so much booze my head was swimming like crazy. I leaned up against the rail of the balcony while trying to keep my food down. I cracked open my eyes to look down at the people dancing wildly on the lawn. 5 long stories down. It made them look unbearably small and far away. The music was causing the ground to shake. Or was I shaking? Oh whatever my head was throbbing. I heard the door open and tried to look back but couldn't on account of my raging headache. "You look good princess~" Jose's voice rang out behind me.

" hello josé." I groaned.

"You look good princess." he said again as he pulled the bottle of whiskey out of my hand.

"Good to know I'll look good even in my grave…" I said slumping against the rail with a glare in his direction. He laughed, leaning against the railing, looking at me with a soft smile.

"How are ya liking the party babe?" He ask softly.

"I danced, got groped, drank myself silly, tried coke and made out with Vanessa twice…then drank more to forget how good that may have felt! So all and all your party's a hit josé!" I laughed.

"Damn you don't waste a moment do ya princess! I'm happy you had a great time! You gonna head home soon?"

"Ehhh i don't know Jo. I might but my girls are all over the place and my head is pounding and I think I'm gonna puke. It's not looking good." He laughed and I chuckled with him.

"Well lemme help you down the stairs huh?" He ask holding his arms out to me with a big goofy smile on his face. I couldn't help but smile back at him and pushed myself up and somewhat into his arms before falling back and swaying over the rail a bit while we both giggled like children. The music drummed and the wind blowed and my feet slipped all in slow motion. I could feel myself tumbling backwards and my arms slipping through his hands. My back hit something cold and hard. I flipped backwards and felt the world spill out below me. There was nothing, just a sharp crack as I shattered against the pavement.

Everything was oddly peaceful. I didn't really mind. Or maybe I didn't realize. I…died?

It was Cold after. it was cold and dark and my head was throbbing. I couldn't move my limbs. My eyes cracked open only to slam shut again in an attempt to keep the light from beaming into them. I barely managed to twitch my fingers for a while but eventually I surpassed to strength to push myself up and rubbed my eyes.

I felt strange like I couldn't really control my body. I couldn't breathe and my whole body felt cold and numb all over. Finally I managed to keep my eyes open….What the fuck is this….The roof was a myriad of light, and dark gray slats littered with holes.

The floor was dirt with a thin brown sheet pinned down by bricks and slats that made up the walls.

This place was nothing like what I was used to. I lay on a pallet of stained blankets on the floor. Everything stank of dirt and sewage around me.

My body was covered in bloody bandages that were quite possibly the cleanest thing in the room. I could barely move beyond sitting up and waving my arms around slowly. Every movement cut through me like a hot knife through butter forcing me back down into the sad little bed, for which I began to feel trapped.

I lay there for what felt like hours, just watching the sun drift across the sky. The sky was a deep lavender with light yellow clouds that lazily tip-toed around me. Occasionally my mind would wander or fall into nothing. I'd wake up hoping to see my glittering chandelier and orange satin blankets. Crème orange walls, plush furniture, and soft yellowed light sparkling through the balcony doors…all gone.

I opened my eyes to see the same drab, unsanitary room as before. All of the air spilled out of my lungs and I simply deflated.

Everything I'd spent a lifetime working for…my awards, friends, clubs, my body! I've spent YEARS working out and building myself up. My resume, college applications, my degrees and scholarships, business relationships and future plans that I've organized my entire life around. Dizzy…my poor, precious poodle…all gone. I'll never get to pet her or hold her or here her little whimpers again. I'll never get to rub my awards in moms face or finish college or take over the business world. Everything is gone, and I don't even know where I am now!!

I lay there, going back and forth between sobbing dramatically, grumbling furiously, and internally drowning, and failing rather painfully to force myself out of bed.

Eventually the sun set to far for me to see and the sky settled into deep purples and reds. By the time night fell completely I had cried myself back to sleep. Eventually due to a myriad of very strange nightmares I startled awake and threw my hands over my face.

Then I remembered my situation and became furious all over again. My hands flung down to the bed and I angrily shoved myself up…and then immediately regretted it and groaned in pain.

Which caused me to start sobbing…again. I plungged my head into my hands and just sobbed loudly. I was so lost in my self loathing that I didn't even notice the other person crouching down beside me, that is until she touched me. I must've jumped 5 feet into the air, which also hurt like crazy, especially when I hit the paper wall. The person sat staring at me in shock.

It was a little girl with big black eyes, dark ashen skin and frizzy dreads. In the darkness I couldn't tell whether it was a boy or girl but i could tell that They were bone thin and wore baggy clothes that seemed 4 sizes to big for them. Their eyes were wide with shock and their hand was outstretched, trembling towards me. They blinked rapidly and dropped their hand.

"YOU WOKE UP! I mean the doctor said you might but he's such an idiot and you were so hurt, I mean I hoped you would but I thought you'd die I can't believe you woke up! You actually woke up!!" They babbled frantically in awe.

I blinked at her like a feral cat. Then slowly moved towards the person. I put my finger on their forehead and pushed them away from me slowly.

"Personal space…person I don't know…" I muttered shakily.

They blinked at me then snatched their hands away.