Chapter 3: Talks and Birthdays 1/2

Summary: Motivated, miffed, and magical, Shikamaru Nara was a force to behold. Whoever had placed him here was going to get it, but first he'd have to get through a school for magic. And he'd thought ninjas could be stupid. Troublesome.

Rating: T, and should stay that way.

Genres: Friendship, Adventure, Hurt/Comfort, maybe more, I don't know yet.

Warnings: Language, SPOILERS FOR NARUTO AND HARRY POTTER, bullying, implied child abuse/neglect, serious amounts of mind-melting snark, some angst - not much, warnings are individual per chapter, might change next chapter or might not. No incest, pedophaelia slash or yaoi, yuri, Shounen Ai, or Shōjo Ai.

Pairings: As far as romance goes, it's canon for both series. Friendship!Shikamaru/Harry&Ron&Hermione&Neville&Fred&George. I might add more later, if I think of it.

Disclaimer: WILL NEVER OWN!

Edit (5/8/16): Small clean ups and miniscule changes that won't change much in later chapters, for those of you who have already read this.

"Speech"

'Thoughts'

(#) Something to help explain a certain action or characteristic

Time period

Emphasis on words/Flashback

Regular text

A Shadow in Wizard's Robes Chapter 3: Talks and Birthdays

By: AngelicSilverWolf

'Today you are you! That is truer than true! There is no one alive that is you-er than you!' - Dr. Seuss.

Age 6: Five years before Hogwarts:

"Come back here!"

Shikamaru grimaced at the shout. Now, why on this questionable Earth would he possibly do that? He continued on and, upon running into a wired gate, looked around and spotted a fire escape. Freedom. Well. Temporary freedom, anyway. At the very least, deliverance. He heaved himself onto a nearby convenient dumpster and lunged for the fire escape above it.

Thankfully he made it. Barely, but it counted. He didn't even have to use chakra. He had his vigorous training to thank for that. He tugged himself up and was just standing up, when his pursuer dashed into the alley. He felt his lips tugging themselves into a smirk, but he restrained himself. It was quite amusing to see his attempted tormenter redder than a tomato with both exertion and anger.

"Hey!" the boy who was older by three years exclaimed, and talk about pathetic, going after a younger child. Even if he was a genius. "You can't be up there!"

Shikamaru shrugged. Technically he was neither allowed nor not allowed.

"I'm gonna tell on you," the boy continued triumphantly. Shikamaru shook his head in no small amount of derision (he'd never been like that as a child, right?) and climbed off of the fire escape, jumping to the ground below. He rolled off the impact to reduce pain to his legs. Then he offered a final sarcastic two-fingered salute to the boy behind him and ran out of the alley, enjoying hearing sputters behind him.

Now that he had dealt with that nuisance, he was free for the rest of the day. The orphanage had discovered his magic three years ago when they'd caught him walking up the wall (in his defense, he'd been using his chakra, not magic). From then on, they'd made something of an outcast of him and had been very clear in their dislike of his general existence. If he hadn't already lived one life, it would have been very soul crushing. As it was, he returned their sentiments and tried to avoid them all like the plague unless they deliberately sought him out, like today. Then it was all restrictions off and open season on whoever tried to push him around.

He stopped for a moment to catch his breath and consider where he would go today. There was that one place he'd heard about from the new woman…

"Are you okay?"

Shikamaru looked up to see a somewhat shabbily dressed man with light brown hair graying at the temples and green-brown eyes staring down at him in concern. He belatedly realized the picture he himself painted, thin and young with worn clothes. The fact that he was panting a little probably didn't do anything to make him less resemble a homeless or neglected child. Which, somewhat true but still. He didn't have to look the part.

It wasn't like he was Naruto though; this body had limitations and he wasn't terribly fit. Kind of hard to be with an unsteady source of food and good environmental hygiene.

"Yeah," he replied. The man didn't look convinced. To stave off further questions, he added a little suspiciously, "Who are you?" Best to at least try and act his age, though whether or not he would succeed was up for debate.

"You may call me Lupin, I suppose," the man - Lupin - said with an understanding smile. "And yourself?"

"Shikamaru," he said. "Can you tell me where I am? I lost the street name a few alleys ago." He had been trying to keep track, but it was more difficult than expected while also trying to be as inconspicuous as possible. His pursuer's complete lack of anything stealth made it pretty close to impossible without chakra, something he was trying to use only in emergency situations since it was a little suspicious to see a child running along rooftops like a pro parkor practitioner.

"You are still in London, in case you were concerned, a few streets from Charing Cross Road," Lupin answered. He looked at him curiously. "Do you need help getting somewhere?" Shikamaru was caught between relaxing around this man's apparent innate likeableness and his training to stay away from strangers. Lupin's offer of aid was the most genuine thing he'd heard in literal years. It was refreshing - and dangerous.

"Well," Shikamaru said slowly, "I'm trying to reach this place I heard about, just to see if it's still around." If he phrased it correctly, he'd be able to tell if this man was magical or not. Rather small chance on the former, but he had to start somewhere.

"Ever heard of The Leaky Cauldron?" he asked. Lupin's eyes sharpened with interest and recognition. So either magical or related to a magical relative.

"It rings a bell," the man said carefully. "May I ask from where you heard about it?"

Shikamaru smirked a little at the reminder of what had happened. "I live in a nearby orphanage, and the patrons there are very talkative about places like that," he said. And by talkative he meant vindictive towards. How they all got saddled with over thirty children he'd never know. Realization dawned on Lupin's face, right before distaste flashed over it, only to be covered by polite interest.

So he'd heard about the orphanage then. Probably nothing good if his face meant anything, but also most likely true.

"I think I know what orphanage you're talking about," Lupin said. But he didn't extrapolate. Instead, he added, "I know where the Leaky Cauldron is. I can take you there, if you want."

Shikamaru nodded after a brief hesitation. He was moderately confident that if Lupin turned into a problem, he would be able to create enough noise to draw attention and escape, if not win in a fight. Maybe. He was still working out just how far this body could be pushed before it gave out. It was a bit of a painful and tedious experiment.

Lupin turned and started to walk, not even checking to see if Shikamaru was following, and damn, now he liked him even more. Shikamaru caught up to him easily and thought about starting a conversation. He ended up not doing so and remained silent until they stopped before a nondescript pub some time later.

"Here we are," Lupin said, gesturing to the building that other people's eyes slid off of and around. Shikamaru peered through a grimy window and saw what was most definitely someone drinking a glass of blood.

"They get all sorts of customers," Lupin said wryly, answering Shikamaru's expression of slight distaste.

"Clearly." Well, that was okay. So what if they served vampires and who knew what else in there - no use being xenophobic now when he would probably have to deal with other such creatures in the not so distant future. "Why don't non-magicals see this? It's obviously warded or something, but why so it in the first place?"

Lupin thought for a minute. "The magical community is very private. They don't generally think much of non-magicals - or, muggles. I think they just don't want to be subjugated to muggle whims, they just want to be left in peace," he replied. So basically they had magic and didn't want to share. Interesting; he wondered if the governments at least knew about each other.

"Well, thanks for getting me here," he said. Lupin smiled again.

"You're welcome. Would you like me to come inside with you?" he asked. Again, no condescension. What a nice person. He kind of reminded Shikamaru of Iruka - all quiet strength and sincere demeanor; until someone really pissed him off. Then it was everyone for themselves in an effort to escape the splash zone. Shikamaru shook his head anyway.

"No. I'll be fine. The owner is human, right?" he asked, just to check. Not that there were any problems with nonhumans, but he'd be a bit more comfortable if the person he was asking instructions from wasn't eyeing him like he was lunch. Lupin nodded.

"Ask for Tom. He's the owner and bartender. He should be able to direct you to wherever else you want to go," he said. "It was nice to meet you, Shikamaru."

Shikamaru nodded in agreement, and then entered the bar. He wasn't great at good byes. Besides, he was sure he wouldn't see Lupin again. What were the chances of that happening a second time?

…

Present Day:

Shikamaru stared at the cowering children in front of him. He took a moment to note the effectiveness of his I Am Displeased face for further study and then moved on.

"So, that happened," he said. They didn't relax. So they had some sense of danger after all. Too bad it hadn't flared up earlier. "And we almost got caught because some people snuck out past curfew to go to a false duel, even though they'd already established that it was probably a trap, because they're apparently incapable of rational thought."

Ron started to protest, but Harry quickly elbowed him into silence. Probably realized that they deserved whatever they were going to get, especially since Shikamaru had helped them not get caught. He caught Hermione's eye.

"And why did you follow them? You could have just let them go and not risk the extra house points your presence would add."

No one answered. He sighed. This was going to be his life now, he knew it. Bailing them out when they made decisions like this. Trying to get Harry and Ron to use their limited common sense, and working on Hermione's desire to tell people off if she didn't agree with whatever they were deciding. It would be good for his patience though, maybe not his health. Or it would drive him insane.

He'd just have to see which happened first, the tipping of his mind over the edge, or the Idiot Trio gaining a healthy amount of self preservation. He really couldn't say which would happen first.

"I'm going to bed," he said, waving a hand. "Think about what I said." He wanted to add 'and maybe your life choices too', but felt that this wasn't the time for humor. He was mostly serious, but it was just a little funny to see them shrink down where they stood. Mean? Maybe. But he got his kicks in where he could get them, and they deserved it for motivating him into making a resolution about something so soon into the school year. He'd let them stew tonight and then subtly let them off the hook tomorrow.

…

"But don't you want to know?"

Shikamaru heroically didn't sigh. It would have come out explosive and frustrated and they would have gotten their puppy eyes out and no one would've been happy.

"No," he said instead, very patiently in his opinion, because this was the fourth time they'd brought up this subject today, and it was dinner time. Perhaps he should have waited longer to let them know he'd forgiven them. "I don't. Why? Because it's none of my business." Great. Now he sounded like Shino. He hoped that they got the implied message that it wasn't any of theirs either, but no such luck.

"But, why have an enormous dog in a room like that? Where anyone could enter," Harry persisted, for the fourth time.

"It was locked," Shikamaru reminded him again, despite himself. He had to interject some logic into this conversation, even though its topic was none of their business (he didn't want to get involved but dammit, this would end up in danger and possibly death if he didn't step in to try to mitigate the damage).

"So, they were guarding something then?" Ron interjected, looking far too invested in the conversation to be healthy. Shikamaru sighed and gave up. Logic and reason had clearly left this conversation for good. He'd missed its brief presence.

"Not necessarily, maybe it was a ploy," Harry said knowingly.

"What; like some kind of spy movie?" Shikamaru asked, deciding that he might as well try to add some reason. He couldn't beat it, so he'd join in and all that. "No, I don't think so. Besides, what would they have to guard in a school, anyway?"

"Something valuable or rare," Ron said, almost dreamily. Well, it was a magical school, to be fair.

"Or both." Harry grinned in excitement. And hope of relative normalcy dead. Burnt up and shriveled and rapidly disappearing in the wind. Never mind, he changed his mind, he couldn't do it. "Shikamaru? Why are you thumping your head against the table?"

Anyway.

After dinner, Shikamaru bid goodbye to his friends, with no small amount of relief - they could handle themselves for a few minutes, right? - and went in search of the person who'd started this whole thing. It was an unfair place of blame, but he did have some justification and he was sticking with it. He caught Fred and George as they were coming out of the hall.

"Shika! Can we call you that? How's it going?" Fred said in delight. Shikamaru ignored the slight pang of nostalgia that name caused and nodded with a lazy half-smile.

"S'good," he said. "What're you two up to?" Fred and George exchanged mischievousness glances and he raised a hand. "Never mind. I don't want to know. Gives me plausible deniability when McGonagall finds you."

George gasped dramatically while Fred placed a hand over his heart and did his utmost to look mortally offended. "Mister Nara!" he said, wounded tone lacing every word. "I can't believe that you would doubt our ability to have a proper getaway plan. Especially with the tools you so kindly gifted us."

Shikamaru raised an unimpressed eyebrow, unmoved by the theatrics. They had nothing on Lee's and Gai's Rainbows of Youth (those who saw that were scarred forever and were never the same again). "I meant that McGonagall will suspect you regardless of your escape, and I don't want to accidentally get pulled into it somehow," he said. Fred and George dropped their pretend offended tone and grinned good naturedly.

"Well, so long as we're clear," Fred joked. Shikamaru titled his head.

"You don't happen to know where Draco Malfoy is, do you?" he asked. They raised their eyebrows in tandem, and he took a moment to wonder whether it was from practice or coincidence. Or one of those legendary twin soul connections.

"Probably his common room, why?" George asked slowly.

Shikamaru shrugged. "I want to have some words with him."

Their faces lit up in identical expressions of unholy glee. It was disconcerting, how in sync they were. It also brought back some unpleasant memories of the two hellions in Konoha.

"Oh, is Malfoy Jr. in trouble?" Fred asked.

"Do you perhaps need a prank to settle the score?" George added.

"Do you even know what he did?" Shikamaru asked. Maybe in amusement. Maybe not. And when did his word quota stretch without his noticing? He'd have to think about his disturbing increase in word count later on.

"No, but we figure that if you, Neutrality Nara, are going to 'have some words' with the little twat, then he did something," George said. Shikamaru had to concede his clever word play.

"Nothing big," he said. Well. Besides where he almost caused the probable expulsion of three Gryffindor students through an indirect attack. Other than that, nothing big at all. "I just want to clear some things up." Fred waved him away easily.

"Stay enigmatic then, we'll find out eventually. You'll come to learn that the Hogwarts gossip mill is unmatched by even the Daily Prophet in terms of time it takes for rumors to spread," he said cheerfully. Shikamaru acknowledged this with the slightly immature eye roll that it deserved and turned towards the Slytherin common room. He had Hogwarts a History to thank for the location. Really, 'dungeons' was not a particularly vague hint. He looked around, saw some Slytherins entering and leaving a certain corridor, and followed subtly. He stopped in front of a dead end stone wall and knocked, lightly enough that it could've been mistaken for someone being nudged into it.

It sounded hollow. He smirked in mild triumph. Amateurs. They didn't even bother to make anything real except for the looks and texture. He knocked again, harder, twice. The sound echoed in the damp corridor. He took in his surroundings while he waited. Mostly stone wall and ground, and a few windows from which shone the green light of the lake, casting strange lights over the stone.

He supposed it made sense that the house of green be lit with green light, no matter how eerie. The door melted away and dozens of haughty and slightly hostile eyes looked his way. They'd guessed he wasn't one of them, then.

"Gryffindor," an older student said, standing up. "What do you want?"

"To speak to Draco Malfoy," he replied. He could feel the hierarchy that was in place here. Slytherin was a place where respect was earned and position fought for. Seniority mattered, and words meant the difference between being an outcast and being heralded as important. Good thing he had excellent practice in both politics and damage control as Naruto's advisor (as charismatic as the blond was, he still stepped on quite a few toes with his rather brash nature).

And one thing he'd learned was that people were caught off guard with honest intentions. It made them wonder about the genuinity of it and whether there was an ulterior motive. It wasn't good practice to be consistently honest, but every now and then threw others off.

The Slytherin looked quickly at a nearby housemate, who shook his head, before turning back with a blank expression.

"He isn't here," he said.