Meant to Be

“Saturday! It’s Saturday!” I hear, trying to keep myself asleep for a few minutes longer. Adorable tiny fingers dig into my arms trying to get me to wake up. “Lucy! Wakey! It’s Saturday morning!”

“My love,” I sighed, giving up on sleeping in today. It’s the last Saturday of summer vacation. After this weekend, senior year starts. I’ve been dreading the start of senior year all summer. “I need you to get off me before I toss you off.”

Baby Ariel takes off as fast as her little legs could take her out of my room. I sit up in my bed, rubbing the sleep out of my eyes, praying that for once my kids would let me sleep in.

“Look! Look at my stuff. Isn’t it neat!” I hear from a young male voice on the other side of my closed door. Oh no. Please. No. The horrendously incorrect lyrics are not what I want to hear right now.

“Would she think it's complete?” Serena sings, holding Ariel in her arms, followed by the rest of the kids. “Wouldn’t she think Ariel's the girl?” She paused, letting Ariel fall onto my bed, followed by all the kids jumping onto my bed with me.

“Ariel has everything?” Ariel chirps, waving her hands around. She isn’t going to stop singing until we all join in.

Ariel uses that song to always get her way. She knows that it’s the kryptonite of everyone in this house. It’s against Hastings’ household rules to not sing along to Part of Your World from The Little Mermaid, even though we sing it incorrectly. Having six people in my bed at one time isn’t an unusual occurrence in our household, so I can’t complain that all the kids are here.

Most seventeen-year-olds want privacy. They don’t want their siblings in their room. I’m not like most teenage girls; I love having my siblings in my room. Keeping them all in my line of sight has been drilled into my head the last few years. We all love spending time in my bed with me reading to them at night, but mornings are where I want to draw the line.

Giving in to their antics I sing, “Let's go where they walk, up where we can run. Up where Ariel stays all day in the sun.” All the kids watched in horror at my atrocious singing voice. Years of singing this song together and they never get used to it. “Everyone! Join in!” I shout.

My five lovely kids all join in singing. No one in our family can sing, so we shout the next lyrics at the top of our lungs. “Wanderin’ free, with Ariel and Eric! I wish I could be. Part of Ariel's world!”

After a few more ballads sung by the Hastings clan, all the kids finally got out of my room. I promised them that if they let me get ready for the day in peace, then I would take them all to the park. The local park is my saving grace. It has something for all the kids. A skatepark for Seth and Serena to skateboard. A playground for Ariel and Oliver to run and play. A large tree for Derek and me to sit underneath and read.

September air in Minnesota is the crisp approach for the harsh winter to follow. It took all of ten minutes to get myself in an old hoodie and leggings and give myself two double French braids on my head.

“Alright! Seth, Derek, and Oliver pack the car with whatever we need for a day at the park. Serena, get Ariel ready for the park. I’ll make us some breakfast and we’ll be out of here,” I said, giving orders to everyone in the house.

No one slacks off on my watch.

***

The kids and I made it to the park before noon which is an accomplishment for us. Keeping track of five kids is no easy task. Especially when you add a gigantic Siberian Husky to the mix, then all hell breaks loose. No matter how difficult the task, we, as a family, defy all odds and get things done.

Being a foster kid isn’t the most glamorous life. Especially when the role of the parents has been dropped on my shoulders. The restless nights and chasing energetic kids around the house are what we’re used to. Our life hasn’t been perfect, but we make the most of the hands we were dealt.

Ares, our dog, rests his head on my ankles when we take a seat under a large tree. The slightest chill is welcoming the incoming autumn and winter air here in Minnesota. Beautiful blue sky, the kid’s laughter filling the air warmed my heart. I didn’t have the chance to read much, because I needed to keep an eye on every kid.

Seth and Serena Gomez know how to look out for one another. They’re fourteen-year-old twins who have been planning world domination since they were born. Double trouble, Jekyll and Hyde, or Bonnie and Clyde are the nicknames that have been given to them over the years. Seth is an evil genius, while Serena is the logical brain behind the operation. Currently, they’re skateboarding on the halfpipe in the park.

Derek Fuller is my ten-year-old second coming of Albert Einstein. The boy has his head always studying in a book. I want him to enjoy being a kid, but I don’t want to hurt his feelings by disparaging what he wants to do. He’s sitting next to me reading a book. We may not share the same DNA, but that boy is my little brother. Sharing a passion for reading is something that the two of us share.

Oliver Anderson is my little dreamer and he’s seven years old. He tends to isolate himself from everyone, but he always has this belief that everything is going to work out in the end. Oliver hides away in his treehouse at home but would drop everything to help his siblings. He’s the lookout for Seth and Serena’s evil plans and he’s Derek’s permanent chess partner.

Ariel Hastings is my four-year-old little angel. She’s my everything and our family would be incomplete without her.

In my daze, I didn’t notice the kids all crowding around me. “Did you kids give up on physical exercise already?”

“I haven’t started,” Derek stated, without looking up from his book.

Seth dropped to his knees and confiscated Derek’s book. “Come on! Family soccer game!” Derek huffed, while Seth screamed in his ear. “We can’t play guys versus girls without you D. You in?”

Derek groaned, taking his book back from Seth. Everyone watched with anticipation for his answer. “Fine. One game then I need to get back to studying.”

Our soccer game was in full swing. Serena, Ariel, and I were a power team because the boys didn’t want to accidentally hurt her. Ares, our real-life mascot, ran alongside us all on the field. We didn’t have any nets, but that didn’t stop us from claiming goals when we felt we got them. Derek, Oliver, and Seth worked like a well-oiled machine. The boys took the game seriously while being able to roll in the grass and have fun. Seth enjoys winning, but he would never take away the victory from baby Ariel.

“Next goal wins!” I shouted, feeling winded after running. I don’t know if it’s my large sweatshirt or the fact that I’m out of shape, but I can’t run for much longer. “I’m going to die if we don’t end this game soon,” I said to Ariel and Serena in our team huddle. “Little miss, you’re our secret weapon. You got this!”

“I’m on it!” Ariel squealed.

Ariel ran around the grass trying to kick the ball with her little legs. I lifted Ariel from underneath her armpits. I swung her between my legs and her little feet collided with the ball, sending it across the grass. I’m not sure if it landed beyond the goal line, but everyone erupted into cheers. We all crowded around Ariel cheering for her winning goal.

Before my lungs gave out, I took my spot underneath the shade of the tree. The kids followed my lead and we all sat down catching our breath. Derek immediately went back to his book, while the rest of the kids played with Ares.

“Lucy?” Oliver whispered, stuffing his hands in his pockets. “Do you think we’ll be able to talk to Eric soon?”

His question made everyone pause. Even Ares.

“I’m not sure. He’s busy helping people feel better, but I know he’s never too busy to talk with you guys. I promise that I’ll call him and see when he’s able to video chat with us,” I said, trying to convey the perfect promise for Oliver without breaking his heart.

“Is he coming home soon?” Derek asked.

“I know that he’s coming home when we start petitioning the court, so that’s something to look forward to,” I smiled.

Oliver and I have a different relationship with our foster dad than the rest of the kids. Oliver was the first kid to be brought home when he was a few months old. He’s never known parents other than the two people who raised him. Being the oldest, I remember more of my life before foster care and I understand why Eric needs to work so much. The kids all miss Eric when he’s away, so do I, but I do my best to give them the motherly and sisterly affection that comes with raising kids.

“Soon we won’t have to look over our shoulders,” Serena grinned, petting Ares like an evil villain. “We’ll be able to happily live together.”

I playfully slapped her arm because I don’t like having the kids talk about being separated. We’re a happy family all the time. The idea of being separated plagues our nightmares, especially mine, but talking about it makes the fear real. The idea that at any time our family can be taken away without warning is my greatest fear.

“Nothing is going to tear our family apart. I will go to the ends of the earth to get custody of you kids, so it’s my job to worry about it. It’s your job to be kids,” I said, pulling Ariel onto my lap. She wrapped her arms around my neck and snuggled into my chest. I sighed, knowing that keeping my kids happy, healthy, and safe is my top priority.

Being a foster child is difficult, especially when you haven’t been formally adopted yet. Our foster parents thought they had all the time in the world to finalize the adoptions; however, life had other plans. You have the lingering fear that you could be shipped off to another home at any minute. Social workers can come and take you away for any reason they see fit.

The kids and I have been in the foster system for most of our lives. We came from different places, but we found a home with Eric and Clarice Hastings. None of us ever became adopted; however, our home is being together. We’re a family and nothing is going to change that.

“To our future guardian!” Serena exclaimed, holding up her water bottle.

“To our happily ever after!” I exclaimed as the kids all lifted their water bottles together.