A hypothetical situation in which during Counter Guardian EMIYA's one-sided, futile battle against the ORT (where he is the one that gets beat the fuck up), Humanity gets annihilated, Alaya's grasp on him breaks, and Zelretch - ever the opportunistic troll -, decides to yeet our favorite nameless sword-wielding Archer into the wonderful world of gods, dragons, magical tits, and other supernatural shenanigan bullshit. Surely nothing could go wrong, right? "Fuck Zelretch. And damn my E-rank luck too." Well, at least he can retire peacefully (heh) now. "I always did want to open a cafe…" ... ... ... Disclaimer: This story has characters I do not own. All characters belong to the owners of Fate/Stay Night and Highschool DXD