Chapter 94: The Present is a Wonderful Time

Summary:

Some more fluff

Eclipsa smirked. "It seems we found Buff Frog's door." She noted the design, green with swamp water dripping down it..

"Definitely smells like him. The mossy swamp water smell will actually be a nice change of pace from Ponyhead's dreams. Glitter and Sugar, with just a pinch of jasmine." Steven noted with a nod. "I think there might actually be something I'd call too sweet."

"Yet I'll keep eating Snookers till the day I die." The former queen of Darkness snickered as they entered the door. "Now, what you'll notice is the layers. Buff Frog is an old and wise soul, he has his more private thoughts buried deep, subconscious protection against a power he probably isn't even aware exists."

"I always thought he was too smart to be working as a grunt for Ludo. He always seemed to have more sense than the others." The boy recalled.

"Now what's important is double metaphors. You can imagine things to make it easier to traverse, like rooms and stairs, but you mustn't forget that this is his head with its own logic. For example, Buff Frog is very loyal, so most memories should be entrusted to people rather than locked up boxes." She pointed to the tadpoles that were guarding a pond, each one seemed to be a flashing moment from his life.

"Wow, Buff Frog really trusts and loves his kids." Steven approached one, and it instantly bopped him on the head and sent him on his back. "And has a very high opinion of their capabilities."

"A parent always believes their kids can be better than they were." She smiled. "You have to be gentle in your approach, this mind has many defenses, especially if you harm them."

"Right." He approached the tadople again, this time on his knees while offering a gentle hand to the young one. "It's okay, I'm not going to harm anybody. You're a strong and capable person, and I just want to know a little more about you."

The being stared at him, giggling before opening its mouth wide, showing an image of Buff Frog spending time with his mother, caring for her as she was bedridden. "Oh, poor dear. I can imagine how much that impacted his need to provide for his family."

"Yeah … I know this is training, but I'd rather not pry into a friend's memory if that's alright." Steven said, before rubbing his ear. "Also the children are starting to get loud."

"… Steven, they're not making any noise." Eclipsa turned back to him.

"Well something is … calling …" His body began to glow pink just a tad. "Oh crap, me and Star fused again, we probably just entered another dimension by this point."

"Curiouser and curiouser." The former queen inspected the boy's glowing body. "Hm, you say that this form is triggered by rage and stress?"

"Yeah, most of the time I do it without even meaning to. It comes in short bursts and I usually end up creating this massive shockwave." The boy looked at his body.

"Then maybe calming down will help. Come back to my mind palace, I have plenty of techniques that could help the situation." She offered.

"Yeah I'll try anything." The boy sighed. "We're super lucky Marco has that weird thing with Hekapoo."

"Some of the best relationships we can have can sprout from the unlikeliest of places. Whether romantic or platonic, by chance or by choice." She giggled as they made their way out. "Such as yours with the darling Woolet you fancy."

"Kelly, it's … well Lion sort of just popped me in her dimension randomly one day. Something about her just drew me in, even if we didn't have that much in common back then." Steven smiled warmly.

"Same for me and my beloved. Something about those yellow eyes and sharp fangs just made him completely alluring." She chuckled. "And bonus for being such a charmer."

"If I see any sex stuff in your head I'm bolting."

"Oh no, those thoughts are locked away in my special vault, guarded by the scariest creature I know in existence." She pointed to the image of her mother carrying a flaming sword. "No one's ever going to get a peak of those thoughts if I can help it, unless you really want to know."

"I know you think all knowledge is good knowledge, but there's still some knowledge I don't want to know about." To each their own.

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Validia laughed, slapping her knees. "So Marty got his ass handed to him by your son and his adopted dad?"

"They sent him to the ER. A little overkill, but really cathartic." Her old friend and roommate chuckled a bit sheepishly. "So I'm no longer on the run and have to disguise myself whenever I get hungry. Although River's fishing methods were surprisingly helpful."

"I'm still reeling from the news that you actually managed to find your kid." She remembered just how heartbroken and devastated Greg was when Rose disappeared. "Congrats, man. How's it feel to finally join parenthood?"

"Honestly, not as bad as the books made it out to be." The man smiled. "I technically skipped everything from diapers to terrible twos, so now I'm more of an uncle that's worried he's gonna do something way out of his range."

"Lucky bastard, all of the joys and none of the responsibilities." She doubted Onion was ever going to grow out of his 'throw bricks at windows' phase. "So how is the little guy? Most I hear about him are whispers around town about riding a giant pink lion and fiery rainbows."

"That's him and his sister. They just have wild adventures all the time." The man smiled. "It's awesome watching him be so happy."

"Ah, a rambunctious sibling duo. Kinda makes me wish Sour Cream got into more trouble if it meant he hung with Onion just a little. The two of them are so different you can hardly tell they're related." Must've been an age thing. 

"Yeah, I don't think I've ever seen Steven or Star without the other, at least for long periods of time. They even got matching magic face marks and everything." He laughed. "So what've I missed in Beach Creek other than my kid coming back into existence?"

"Nothing too major, my kid's forming his own band, mayor Dewey is in hot water for faking his family history, the car wash got demolished, all the standard town stuff."

"Ouch, looks like I need a new job." He muttered. "You still have an opening for a muse?"

"I want a muse, not a detractor." She deadpanned. "You're about thirty years too late for that position, and even then that would be a hard pass."

"Geez, tell me how you really feel."

"Just did." She laughed. "Plus I've had to up my game a little. The Diaz's stuff has been selling like crazy, and it's hard to catch up."

"Oh yeah, you know, it's funny when you know all your kids are gonna be richer than you one day." He sighed. "At least they'll be all right."

"That's the great feeling a parent can have. Knowing their kids will turn out okay. Hopefully better than we are at the moment."

"I can lend you some money if you're in a tight spot, I'm still technically loaded."

"Well it would be nice to finally get some payback for all the milk you used up." Validia shrugged. "But I'm good for the most part. YellowTail has always kept us stable, and I can always count on him to be there." Another thought came to her head. "Have you ever thought about getting back in the game, dating wise at least?"

"Not particularly if we're being honest. Rose was one of a kind, I'm not sure if I could capture the same magic again." He answered. "Also it would be awkward as hell for Steven if he had a third mom in his life."

"He already has two dads, wouldn't be that weird." She shrugged. "Family is family if you're able to make it work."

He shrugged himself. "Say, you wanna hear a new song I've been cooking up? Been getting back into the old space theme."

"Sure. About time I say. I was starting to think you were going emo with the dad shtick."

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"OH YEAH!" Hekapoo shouted, kicking another skull in. "That's what you get for crossing the border, skum!" She shouted, letting the other two wrap it up as she closed yet ANOTHER Starry Quartz portal.

"Yeah, get your hairy butt out of here!" Amethyst, the only member of the Crystal gems she could consider more than a work acquaintance, cheered as she wrapped her whip around two more thugs and threw them out. "Aw man, I forget how great dimension jumping could be.

"I know." Spoke the now adult Marco. "Just kicking but and taking no names, because the moment you say them aloud an insurmountable energy wave collapses onto your body."

"Yeah, that's a bitch." She agreed. "And you still haven't fixed this mess you know." She gestured to the pink portal she just finished patching.

"We're working on it. At the moment, Steven's trying to figure out the dream aspect of it." Marco commented. "The most we can figure is that they're trying to find a specific dimension. They just wake up and unfuse before they have the chance to find it."

She groaned. "Well if there's one satisfying thing to this whole experience, it's kicking monster butt." She stabbed a gal with her heels a few more times. "That was for the haircut bitch."

"You're a little more brutal than the last time we hung out." Amethyst observed.

"Yeah … a week of no rest will do that to you." She admitted. "I have no clue how you gems can go years on end without that stuff."

"Absorbing sunlight and energy boosting or whatever, I didn't listen to Pearl's nerdy rant about it." The short purple girl shrugged. "Sleep is more of a fun hobby for me." Well wasn't she lucky.

"Hey, I for one, am happy for an excuse to see Nacho again." Marco began petting his dragon bike. "Who's a good girl?"

" Prrrrr." The dragon cycle moaned in pleasure. Such a cute little girl.

"I just wish there was more time for stuff like this. Hanging out, riding dragons, kicking assholes across the dimensions." Heckapoo sighed. "Nowadays, the commission's just getting their heads up their butts over the toffee thing and Eclipsa still existing."

"Couldn't you just … ignore her?" Marco asked. "She doesn't have the wand, she can't do much."

"Can't Star tear holes in reality without the wand?"

"Eh, Steven's talked to her alot lately, apparently she can't 'dip down' or whatever." Amethyst shrugged. "I know Rose ain't exactly on your list of favorite people…."

"That's putting it mildly." The woman grumbled. She half suspected Rose was just hiding inside of the kid as a new form of torment on the Commission. Only thing that stopped her from fully believing it was the kid actually getting along with Rhombulus. No one could be that good of an actor.

"… But this is the kid who was able to stop the earth from blowing up by talking to a forced fused giant gem mutant. I say give him a little credit."

"A forced fusion what now?"

"Oh yeah … there's a giant gem fusion at the center of the earth that could destroy solar systems." Marco explained. "Steven talked to it, and now it's resting in a bubble."

"I … have so many questions … but fuck it." She sighed. "Let's just get these bastards to prison and be done with it." She grabbed one of them and opened a portal, tossing them inside.

"Say, where did all the monster hate come from anyways?" Amethyst asked as she kicked another thug through the portal. "Not Judging, just curious."

"Wild creatures spend over a couple thousand years without any government, and have ritualistic cultures that involve eating one anothers." Hekapoo explained.

"Actually Steven said that some eating stuff is just nature." Marco said. "Like a rite of passage for a lizard to regrow their arm. Or a dog eating their young when it's blind."

"Still doesn't make it any less disturbing." Heckapoo grumbled. "Commission and I were created to guard the rules of magic, monsters typically defy those rules, so we're just doing our best to keep everything in line, even if things get a little messy." So many Mewmans died due to the Solarian soldier process, and they could barely keep track of Mina's actions. "I mean by rules alone I would have arrested Star five times over, and Omnitraxus … I almost feel sorry for how much bullshit he puts up with."

"Most of those are accidents though." Marco justified. "Can you really blame a couple of kids that are just figuring out the complicated powers they have?"

"I don't know, maybe?" Heckapoo shrugged. "Glossaryck judged all of us for 'not knowing better' when he created us, yet he still never told us a damn thing about what we're supposed to be doing. Everything we've done was us figuring shit out on our own."

"Glossaryck for a dad …" Marco stared off. "That's rough as heck."

"You have no idea." It was nice to just hang with these two … though Marco especially gave her a weird feeling on the inside. One that made her question a few things about what she was doing, morally speaking.

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Rhonaldo glared. "You know … I didn't take it personally when you shattered my life view. I didn't take it personally when you debunked every single theory I ever had. And I didn't take it personally when Melon and Corn people hospitalized me … BUT THIS I DO!" He shouted at the couple as he fried up some more potatoes.

"All I asked was if you guys had something better than plain ole fries." The now usually absent Star Butterfly said next to her horned companion. "Your brother didn't have to give us mozzarella sticks."

"My brother doesn't know better because he's little and I can't blame him. You two are teens, which means I can blame you completely!"

"Rhonaldo, I need fifteen more buckets of fries yesterday, chop chop!" His dad shouted.

"You are going to fix this." He glared.

"Why would we?" The horned guy asked. "If anything, the feud with the pizza place has only given both places more business. That's how the moment works last I checked."

"You say that now, but the last time the food war came to beach creek, it wasn't pretty!" Rhonaldo warned. "A whole town covered in tomato paste and grease. Sounds delicious now, but the stench is unbearable."

"I've smelt my closet, it's pretty bad." Star nodded. "How would we even try fixing it?"

"The last time they teamed up, there was a third competitor beating them both. You need to spice up an enemy so powerful they have to work together."

"Ooh, totally on it!" Star flipped open a mirror and began dialing on it. "Yo Bro, you know that dream you had about opening your own restaurant when you were six? We're about to make it a reality."

"Perfect timing!" The mirror shouted. "Kelly just found a bunch of killer fruit, it'll go great for a smoothie place."

"Perfect! Add in some Snack Sushi and a few of those pizza bagels and we'll be good to go!" The princess smiled at him. "Don't worry Ronaldo, we'll get your dad to hate us in no time." She gave the blogger a thumbs up. "That's basically what my family is naturally talented at half the time."

"That I have no trouble believing." Rholnaldo looked at the horned being, and realized that this was probably not some guy in cosplay going by his recent revelations. "He's an actual demon isn't he?"

"Yes." They raised a hand as Rhonaldo's life flashed before his eyes … It was so wasted!

"Tom, honey, calm down." The apparently princess from another dimension calmed down what appeared to be her boyfriend. "He's just an ignorant earthling who's just curious about the bigger universe around him."

"Right, right." The demon calmed down, the fire dissipating. "Sorry about that, I'm not used to being called out for it in other dimensions."

"It's cool." He really needed to update his blog. Maybe a story swap? Ooh, or an in depth interview! Get the full details on the weirdness around him.

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"How did you manage to calm them down?" Mina heard her best buddy, Jasper, ask.

"I'm used to working with animals, the corrupted run on similar mindsets. A reward and punishment system gets them obedient fast as long as they learn what happens when commands are and aren't followed." Mina explained, looking at their latest catch of a spike monster.

"Hmm … a gem usually is usually bubbled or shattered if they disobey." The gem explained. "If you can't fulfill your purpose, then you must be purged. If you can't follow along, then you're better off dead."

"That just seems like a waste." Mina argued. "Why would you waste a perfectly good worker if you can just shove them into another job?"

"Hah, a gem just doing another job like it's that simple. How hilariously blasphemous." The orange puffball laughed. "Each gem was made for a specific purpose to carry out one function. To go outside the function is to pervert the purpose that our radiant and perfect Diamonds have set out for us."

"Oh, so you're just really loyal to your Queens. That makes sense." Mina noted. "I had no purpose until my Queen, the ever wise and beautiful Solaria, gave me one. We purged the lands of the monster filth, and we nearly succeeded in wiping them all out!"

"Nearly?" Jasper asked.

"We were betrayed … a mission to attack a camp led to disaster. I only learned years later that Rose was responsible for it … she helped the enemy gain strength." Mina seethed.

"Rose Quartz, betraying the side she swore loyalty to, it seems that things never change even after six thousand years." The burly gem gritted her teeth. "Treachery practically runs through her gem. Every word that woman spouts practically radiates poison that sinks into your mind ."

"And somehow everyone thinks she's the best …" She turned to Jasper. "Did she ever get in your head?"

"Never. I respected her tactics and dreamt of fighting her head on during the war. She always seemed to be one step ahead of everyone." The gem looked up at the sky and gripped her hands. "It was due to her existence that I was created, as a soldier, to fight her team of off colors, and I was more than happy to fulfill that purpose…and then she did the unthinkable." The woman threw her fist at the ground and sent cracks through it. "I was right there, guarding my Diamond…and she struck from out of nowhere like some sort of phantom, shattering her in front of everyone for all sides to see."

"She didn't even try to hide it for her own species … I can't tell if that's better or worse … I was created to fight the war, an experiment for an immortal and powerful warrior … but I outlived all my friends …" She smiled. "But I met you, so I find that a win."

"What I feel is insignificant in the long run. I've betrayed the ways of my people, I've fused with a different cut of gem, and seeing that the earth isn't reduced to rubble by now, the cluster has failed to emerge. Once we take Rose's gem and smash it to dust, I'll have nothing left." The gem looked down in despair.

"Hmm … you could just … not view it as your mission." Mina suggested. "Just think of it as avenging your queen, without your current leader. Don't do it for them, do it for the one you truly cared for."

"Do it…because it's something I will myself to do?" The gem seemed confused by the idea.

"If it's for your own desire, then no other form of motivation will compare. I've fought many enemies with the conviction of my own beliefs."

"My own beliefs. Isn't that an idea." The gem began to smirk a little. "You know, for an organic, you're not as hatable as all the other's I've encountered."

"It takes a lot of skill to be as knowledgeable as me." Mina stated proudly. "Besides, even with Rose out of the way, Mewni still gonna need a good monster cleansing, and I can DEFINITELY use someone as strong as you to keep it clean."

"If I can keep the army afterwards, I'd be happy to assist. A bit of spite for Rose to dwell on before she shatters."

"You gotcha yourself a deal, buddy!" She slapped the gem's back playfully. "You wouldn't believe how hard it is to find someone with your level of sense and reasonability." She truly felt she could bond with someone for once.