Chapter 4

Hindi na nasusunod iyong every three months napag usapan namin. Isang beses lumagpas na ng limang buwan hindi pa rin kami nakakapagkita. He always say that he's busy and he can't make it up to me. I really missed him so bad, so i decided to visit his school and bring him a lunch.

"Dito nalang po, Manong. I'll just text you nalang po," sabi ko habang tinatanggal ang aking seatbelt.

"Pero Mam-, "

"Sshh... I know, let's keep this secret okay?," Tumango siya saakin. He's been loyal to me kaya I'm pretty sure he'll keep my secret.

Bumaba na ako ng sasakyan at dumeretso roon sa gate. Napaka init pala.

"Hi, good morning po. I'm Lauren Williams. Can i come in?" I said in jolly.

"Bawal po ang outsider, Ma'am," sabi noong nagbabantay.

"But its too hot here," reklamo ko. "I'll just give this to Clive Raniego, please papasukin niyo na ko..."

"Wait lang, Mam," at umalis siya sa harap ko.

"Wait! Kuya!," I called but he didn't hear me. Kainis! Mapi prito ako rito e.

And after a minute. Clive Raniego standing gorgeously in front of me now. Awtomatikong napangiti ako nang makita siya.

"What are you doing here?," He asked in baritone voice.

"I made your lunch," i show the lunch box with a pouting my lips. "But can you please let me in first, its too hot here." Sabay padyak padyak ko.

Napapikit siya na para bang isa akong malaki niyang problema but despite of that he let me in, dami pang ano ano papapasukin parin pala ako.

"Whoa...," Mangha ko nang makita ang buong lugar. It's a open ground, then may ibat ibang gamit, like the car wheel and many more.

"You come here by yourself?" he said in angry tone. I turned to him wearing a big smile.

"Nope. My driver dropped me off,"

"I didn't saw him,"

"Because he just left." I rolled my eyes. He then hold my wrist to guide me to the bench. Umakyat ako hanggang sa ikatlong baitang para maabot siya because he remain standing in front of me, nakapamewang pa habang tinititigan ako na parang isa akong puzzle na hindi niya ma solve.

Kinuha ko iyong dala kong pag kain sakanya para buksan iyon nang makakain pa.

"Come here sit beside me. Did you eat lunch already? Tikman mo itong niluto ko para sayo," he hold my hands to stopped me opening the lunch box.

"Thank you, I'll eat that later but why are you here?," i bite my lower lip when i noticed that he never leave my hands.

"Why? Don't you want me here? O baka may babae ka rito?," i looked around to see if there's a woman pero iilang mga naka sundalo na uniporme lang ang nakita ko.

"I told you before that this is all boys school, paanong magkakaroon ng babae rito? In fact you shouldn't be here, kung hindi dahil wala lang ang aming chief hindi ka papasukin riyan e." Sabay turo niya sa gate sinimangutan ko iyon.

"I just want to see you," malungkot kong sabi. "Kailan ang huli nating kita? It almost 4 months-."

"I told you I'm busy right? Nag usap na tayo-,"

"I know!" I ranted. "I know I can't do anything if you're really busy, and forgive for doing this, i really just missing you," pabulong ko pang sinabi iyong huling sinabi ko dahil naubusan na ako ng hininga.

"I miss you too already," i noticed he can't now lay a finger on me. Yeah right, he hates public display of affection especially we're here in their training ground.

"Really? Oh, paano mo natitiis na di ako makita sa loob ng apat na buwan!,"

"I have your picture under my pillow. When i misses you i could just stared at it..." he whispered like it was his biggest secret. Nanlaki ang mata ko roon, hindi ko alam iyon ha!

Nangiti ngiti na ako. "Really? What picture?,"

"The cutest one that i took." Nangiti ako lalo. I wonder what picture it is, i wanna see it but i think I wanna try their field.

"Can you teach me your routine in that obstacle like?" sabay turo ko roon sa training ground nila. "I wanna try!"

"I'll not letting you, wearing that kind of dress," he looked at my chest showing a bit of cleavage. Malas! Dapat pala iyong workout suit ko nalang iyong sinuot ko. Next time

I found him taking out his suit. "Soutin mo to." Nangiti akong tanggapin iyon.

It's like a dress to me but my skirt that above the knee was keep on showing. I looked at him, he's now wearing a white sando showing his biceps and his broad shoulders. Ang gwapo niya!

I tied my hair up. "I wanna try to hold a gun, gaya niya!" Turo ko dun sa isang nag sho-shooting.

"No, Lauren! I'll let you to try the field but not a gun." he frowned on me. I pouted. "Come here," alalay niya saakin pababa ng bench. Watta sweet boyfriend.

Sinundan ko lahat ng ginagawa niya. For example stepping on the holes of the car wheel. Hindi pa ako nangangalahati napagod na ako. Sobrang layo naman kasi ng pagitan nila. So, I should stretched more my legs in able finish it.

Good thing that I wear my white sneakers.

Then next step!

I watched him how he step forward and backward. I think i already saw this stunts.

"Andali lang naman nito, parang PE lang namin," natatawa kong sabi nang simulan ko ang ginawa niya.

"This is basic warm ups," halos madapa nang marinig iyon. "Baby, careful," he whispered. Para bang dapat ako lang ang nakarinig nun. Kumabog tuloy dibdib ko at para may kung ano sa tiyan ko na kumikiliti roon.

Naiingit ako sa mga nakahawak ng baril. I wanna try it also.

Then I saw a wall with rope on it. I think i know this game.

"I wanna try it!" Turo ko at tumakbo ng mabilis at dahil mabuhangin ang ground nadulas ako roon at nadapa.

"Lauren, careful!," Nasalo niya ako but I'm still fell on the ground. I felt my knee aching. Ouch! "Are you okay? You need to be careful-" i started to whine. "Oh, you," umiling iling siya.

"My knee is aching," i was like a kid who's crying because of a wound I got.

Thanks to his suit di nagasgasan ang braso ko.

"I told you before to be careful."

"What happened, Clive?" I saw how that guy darted his eyes on my exposed legs. I saw Clive pulled my skirt in able to cover it. Tapos inalalayan niya akong tumayo.

"Can I request for a first aid kit? James?" Clive asked.

"Sure!" At tumakbo paalis.

Inalalayan naman ako pabalik sa bench.

"Oh my gash. My knee!!!" Nakita ko ang tuhod kong may gasgas. "Ugh! Malas naman. Papaano na ko mag susuot ng skirt nito?!" Reklamo ko.

Clive chuckled. Tinapunan ko siya ng matalim na tingin.

"Good thing. You'll not be able to show your legs-,"

"That's not a good thing, Clive!" I shouted. Ikinatawa niya lang iyon.

"Finally, you're gonna wear your pants on." He keeps on laughing, para bang kinatutuwa niya iyon.

"I only wear skirt, not pants!," I ranted.

"Here, Clive," bumalik na iyong James at nag bigay ng first aid kit kay Clive.

"Is that your girlfriend?," Nag angat ako ng tingin sa nag tanong, iyong James na nakatingin saakin. Nag iwas ako nang tingin.

Back off dude, he's my boyfriend.

"Nope. My younger sister," nanlaki ang mata sa sagot ni Clive, mag poprotesta sana ako nang hawakan niya ng mahigpit ang kamay ko. Telling me to shut up.

"Really?" Tawa noong James, tila nabuhayan. "May younger sister ka pa pala." Patuloy nitong tawa na sobra niya talaga kinatutuwa.

"Back off, bro!" banta ni Clive. Nag taas namn ng kamay si James tila sumusuko.

"Okay, okay. So possessive brother, huh," he chuckled then left.

"What did you say!" I shout at him while removing his suit on me. "What am i to you?-" sabay bato ko sakanya nun.

"Wait! Lauren! Listen to me! It's a restricted to us to have a girlfriend. Especially when they found out i bring my girlfriend here, baka patalsikin ako."

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"I know you are very supportive girlfriend for me taking up this path. Baka hiwalayan mo ko 'pag nalaman mo," he kissed my forehead. "I'm sorry," Napapikit ako.

"It's okay, I understand." Malungkot kong saad. Then suddenly my phone beeped.

Manong:

Ma'am nasa labas na po...

Kita kong text na naka flash sa screen ng cellphone ko.

"I gotta go. My driver's in outside."

Tumango siya, "Take care..." palakad na ako palabas ng isinuot niya saakin iyong suit niya na gamit ko kanina. "Iyo na ito. And stop wearing scandalous clothes," at baba ng tingin niya sa dibdib ko.

"Okay..." tumango ako at pumasok sa kotse.

"Ma'am-,"

"Please, Manong. I want silence muna." tinanggal ko iyong suit na binigay ni Clive, it's a forest green camouflage suit i don't know why he gave this to me.

Itinupi ko iyon habang palabas ako. Itatago ko iyon sa baul o kahit saan basta hindi mahahanap nila Mommy at Daddy.

When I enter the double doors i found my parents was there waiting for me. Then their eyes dropped of what I'm holding. Oh no, alas tres palang nang hapon, bakit narito na agad sila Mommy at Daddy?

I saw my Mom cover her mouth when the moment she saw this soldier's thing, para bang nakumpirma lahat nang speculation nang makita niya ito.

"Lauren!," madiin na sabi ni Dad. "What is this!" Daddy shouted while throwing a thing in the center table.

"Teo! Don't be too hard to your daughter-" but Daddy didn't listen instead he cut her off.

"Can you explain, what is this huh?!" Punong punong galit ni Daddy.

My eyes dropped the thing placed on the center table. It was our photos earlier! And then other was a photos of Clive wearing his soldier uniform. Who did this? The only person I know who can do this is Ice! Alam kong darating rin panahong ito, but God knows i didn't prepared for this. Natatakot ako baka magkamali ako ng desisyon, because the thing that only know is I love him.

"D-Daddy-,"

"ARE YOU DATING A SOLDIER?" Napapikit ako sa sigaw ni Daddy.

"Teo! Calm down. We can talk this problem without raising our voices-,"

"May alam ka ba rito?" matalim niyang tinignan si Mommy.

"I didn't know. Ngayon lang pero hindi ibig sabihin nun magagalit rin ako nang husto sa anak natin. Let's hear her explanation please."

"There's no any explanation for doing this to our family!" my dad bloodshot eye turned to me. "You do understand how we hate soldiers! They violated your sister-,"

"But Daddy it doesn't mean we'll hate all the soldiers. Clive is still an amateur-,"

"What I have told you before? Huh? Lauren," nakapamewang na siya ngayon saakin. " What i have told you before!," Daddy shouted at me.

"T-T-That I need to c-check first if he's in line of military-,"

"Did you check? Huh? YOU DIDN'T! We talked about this and you agreed to me!" humikbi na lamang ako, dahil ngayon i think I can't fight for this anymore, si Daddy na yan eh, talo ako. "You promised and you know how I hate people who didn't fullfil their promises!," Tumango ako at sumang ayon na sakanya. "You break up with him-,"

"Daddy-," i cried so hard when I heard it from him. "No. Please Daddy i can't do that," i even saw mommy crying with me. She even hugged me.

"You break up with him or else..." i just saw darkest attitude of my Dad. "I'll make him pay instead. You know me, honey." he said and I know he'll true to his words that i should be scared because i turned my Dad in scariest person i have ever known.

"Sasabihin ko po dapat sainyo kahapon kaso sabi niyo po kailangan niyo ng katahimikan," paliwanag driver ko nung kinaumagahan papunta ako sa school.

Manong:

Ma'am nasa labas na po ako. Maaga umuwi ang Mommy at Daddy niyo pinapasundo ka na po nila saakin.

Basa ko sa buong message. I sighed heavily. Then I saw Clive's text.

Clive:

Next month I'll be free. Mamasyal naman tayo, I'll tell you the date, para mapagkumpara natin ang schedule natin.

My tears fell down on my cheeks. I don't think I can be with you anymore, Clive. I'm sorry. I wiped my own tears when I noticed my driver saw me crying.

"Why! Ice! Why?" i confronted Ice when I finally met him after 5 days.

"It is for your own good."

"Do you think I'm good? I'm so hurt! Ice. It is because of what you did! How can I face Clive again huh?! How can I break our relationship without hurting him?"

"You really like him huh. What about me? Huh? I'm still inlove with you, Lauren! And I'll do anything, para bumalik ka ulit sakin-,"

"I'll never love you again! Napakasakim mo-,"

"It's because I want the best for you-,"

" You think you're the best for me?" I shouted him. Halos masilabasan ang ugat ko sa leeg sa sagutan namin.

"I love you, Lauren. I love you so much," he hold my arm, iniwas ko iyon at humikbi.

"You didn't love me, Ice, because if you do you'll be happy of what makes me happy."

"Lauren, hindi mo naintindihan-," hindi ko na siya binigyan pa ng pagkakataon i explain ang sarili niya, tumakbo na ko palayo sakanya.

I'm now staring at my phone, while I'm crying, Clive is calling me. I need to decline it because I have two bodyguards behind me. Daddy hired them to monitor me if I'm seeing Clive.

Clive:

What is it Lauren, answer my damn calls.

Hindi ako sumipot sa tinakda niyang panahon nang pagkikita namin. I didn't even texting him since then, because if I did, makakarating kaagad iyon kay Dad.

What are you gonna do, Lauren?

Suddenly, i hear some murmurs.

"Why is he here?,"

"He looks more masculine..."

My jaw dropped when I saw who's coming.

It was Clive!

Nung nagtama ang aming tingin, deretso ang lakad niya papunta saakin. Lahat nang tao rito sa school sinusundan siya ng tingin. He's wearing his uniform. Mas lalo pang lumaki ng katawan niya. It looks like he's captain or have a highest position in military even if he's still in his sophomore year. He looks so dangerous, lalo pa ngayon nakikita kong galit siya.

"I told you, your crush is Lauren's boyfriend!"

Nung malapit na siyang makalapit saakin, hinarang siya ng bodyguards.

"Di ka pwedeng lumapit!" hindi nagkakalayo ng laki ng katawan ang bodyguards ko at si Clive, even if Clive is more younger than them, pero dalawa sila, isa lang siya.

Thank God! Hindi nanlaban pa si Clive nang harangin siya. Tumingin lamang siya saakin. His eyes asking me, "What's the meaning of this,"

Lumapit na ko bago pa niya maisip na labanan sila para lang makalapit saakin.

"Please, allow me to talk to him-,"

"Mapapatalsik kami, Ma'am,"

"You can just lie to my Dad, n-na tumakas ako, just... just let me talk to him. Kahit ilang minuto lang," i begged.

"What is this all about, Lauren," may diin na tanong saakin ni Clive.

Nagkatinginan ang dalawa kong bodyguards, "Please, I'll assure you, hindi kayo mapapatalsik."

Nagtanguan sila sa isat isa hudyat na pinapayagan ako. Tinanggal na nila ang braso nila nakaharang sa pagitan namin ni Clive. Kinuha ko naman ang braso niya upang hilahin siya at nang makapag usap kami.

Dinala ko siya sa lugar walang estudyante.

"What is this all about? Bakit may bodyguards ka na? And why the fuck didn't you answer my calls and text-,"

"So feel mo na? Feel mo na yung nararamdaman ko twing hindi ka nakakapag reply sa text ko-,"

"BUT I never ignored your text in almost a month,like you did to me! ," He lashed out. "I told you we'll meet. What happened, Lauren? Are you mad, nung tinanggi kita?"

Napapikit ako. That didn't even bothered me. The only thing bothers me is to how can I break up to him without saying him the truth.

"Everyone in my school knows that I have a famous girlfriend," malambing niyang saad habang hawak hawak niya ang dalawang pisnge ko. "I even got the fight with James because he said he wanted to court you," napaangat ako sakanya. I noticed he had a cut in his lower lip. Nakuha niya siguro yun sa away nila.

Unti unti ako nalulusaw sa narinig sakanya. Pero ito na ata ang matapang kong gagawin, na labanan ang sarili ko sa sobrang pagmamahal sakanya. Because if I fall for this, if i consider my own wants, baka totohanin na ni Dad yung banta niya kay Clive, and i don't want that.

Umiling ako sakanya at inalis ang kamay niya saakin. "I think we need to end this," God knows how I'm trying to hold my tears but my lips starting to tremble.

Nang marinig niya iyon saakin, kumunot ang noo niya.

"I think w-we should focus more in our careers." Pumikit ako then I'm gonna a lie. "Like you have said, I'm mad kasi tinanggi mo ko." i saw him hurt. That was a lie, I'm sorry. "but i understand you. Kaya... i-in order to focus in our own careers. Clive, let's break up-,"

"No. No. No please," he begged. My heart is breaking seeing him begging. He even kissed my forehead. "No break up,please, Lauren. Mahal na mahal kita-," i cried more after he said that.

I love you more but this is for you own good.

"What do you want me to do? I-I'll give up in military and stay to be an engineer-,"

"NO!," I shouted him while pushing him away from me. "Wag na wag mo gagawin yan." i saw his tears na nagpapikit saakin. "I want to you continue your dreams. I want you to be a soldier! Sa tadhana nalang natin iasa kung magiging tayo ba sa huli-,"

"Bakit pa tayo aasa? Kung pwede naman natin gawin iyong nakatadhana."

Nakakainis! Kung magpapatuloy siya baka di ko na siya tuluyang mahiwalayan!

"JUST PLEASE! Please just respect my decision, Clive! I don't want you to be my boyfriend anymore!," after i said that tumakbo ako paalis.

Napatigil siya sa huli kong sinabi kaya nasisiguro kong hindi niya ako susundan.

"Teo!" Sigaw ni Mommy nang sinampal ako ni Daddy.

"What I have told you?," nanggigil niyang duro saakin. "At nakipagkita kapa sa gagong 'yun! I told you to break up with your bastard-,"

"I ALREADY DID!!!," I shouted at him. "Are you happy now? I broke up with a man I love!" Buhos ng mga luha ko. "Are you happy now, seeing your daughter hurt basta masunod ang gusto-,"

" It should be! I'm your father so you should follow my orders because i know what's the best for you because I love you-,"

"YOU DON'T LOVE ME! because if you love, you'll do anything just to make me happy!,"

"See? That moron made you like that! You're not like that before, Lauren! I'll bring you to Australia!"

"NO!,"

He raised his in index finger and pointed to me. "You shut up! YOU. DO. WHAT. I ORDERED. YOU. TO. DO!," Sabay palis ko ng luha at kumawala sa yakap ni Mommy para tumakbo paakyat saaking kwarto.