Why So Serious?

*Snap* with a snap of my fingers the foyer had changed into a game show room where both me and Lucifer were now standing behind Podiums while Charlie was now sitting on a pedestal up above us as both me and Lucifer were faced off opposite of each other.

And in the middle a rather eccentric looking shadow demon appeared before us, "Welcome to Who's the Best Dad Everyone!" He said with all the personality a game show host should have for fun games like this.

"Yaaay! I love watching game shows!" Niffty shouted out all excited like as everyone was now seated in audience seats you'd find at a game show.

"Now then everyone I your lovely host shall say the rules of this game we will have our contestants play today! The rules are simple, as soon as this stage was set I your lovely host had received all the memories of Charlie, Cain and Lucifer on everything the three of you collectively know about Charlie, and I'll ask you both questions that only you both know or that you both think you know about Charlie! First one to get 100 points will be declared the winner! Each question I ask is worth 10 points each when you answer the question perfectly but if this is something you both don't know and only Charlie knows the answer for then whoever is closest to being correct will get the points on the question, so are our contestants ready?!" He asked to which we both nodded as electricity could be seen coming out of our eyes at each other.

'I Will be the Best Dad just you wait and see asshole!' (x2)

"Then let's start the game! Alright you two let's start off with something simple, How old is Char-"

*Buzz* "She is 22 years old!" Lucifer said before he could finish the question.

*XXX* "Ohh I'm sorry but that is incorrect."

"What?! Of course she is! I would know my own daughters age!" He shouted out and sounding all pissed by getting something so easy wrong.

"I wasn't done with my question Mr. Morningstar, the full question was How Old is Charlie in Human Years." The host shaking his head as I press my buzzer as if you get it wrong the other person can answer instead.

*Buzz* "As of this year she is now 225 years old." I say with a smug look on my face.

*DingDing!* "That is correct! 10 points for Cain!" He said as the counter increased to ten putting me in the lead.

"Wow! Should I call you grandma now Charlie?" Angeldust shouted out before laughing while Charlie frowned hearing that before puffing up her cheeks and *Hmphing!* as she got upset from it all.

"Lucky asshole…" Lucifer said with a growl as I grinned in return.

"What? You got to have patience old man, at least hear out the full question first." I say while I could see him grinding his teeth in simmering anger.

"Alright! Second Question! How old was Charlie in Hell Years when she stopped wetting the bed." The announcer said to which Charlie's face got extremely red hearing that.

"Hey! That's private information! I don't want that to be used as a question!" She shouted out as she saw Angel holding himself back from laughing.

*Bzzt!* "She stopped wetting the Bed when she was 6 years old!" Lucifer said to which Charlie hid her face behind her hands in embarrassment.

*DingDing!* "Correct! 10 points to Lucifer!"

"Ha! Suck on that Cain!" He said sounding smug about getting that question right as I just slow clapped for him.

"Congratulations, you got something any parent should know, if you got that wrong and I got that right I'd be more disappointed in you than I am already." I said to which he grits his teeth in anger as he clenched his fist.

"Third Question! Who was the first man, who isn't a family member, that she fell in love with? And this time you both shall write your answers." He said as a whiteboard and marker appeared on our podiums before we began to write our answers which only took us a moment to write up.

"Looks like your both ready, now show us your answers!" He said before we revealed our answers.

Lucifer: Seviathan von Eldritch

Cain: Clark Sinister

"Who the hell is Clark Sinister? Her first Boyfriend she had was that prick Seviathan von Eldritch." Lucifer said confused seeing my answer.

"Maybe your hearing is going bad too old man, he said who was the first man she fell in Love with, not the first man she started dating." I say shaking my head as the announcer nodded.

*DingDing!* "The correct answer is Clark Sinister!" The announcer said which pissed off Lucifer more.

"How the hell was I supposed to know that?!" He says to which I shrug.

"Well if someone wasn't so terribly busy in his workshop making your toys then you would remember that one phase Charlie had as a teenager where she had a thing for PopStar Demons and the one she loved more than anything was on of Hells Best Popstars, Clark Sinister, she never dated the guy but she clearly was in love with the guy, though sadly he died in the exterminations a few hell years ago." I say to which Charlie was fidgeting around, feeling embarrassed that all her past was being dug up like this.

"Alright, Cain has 20 points and Lucifer has 10 points, Question number Four, Who was the one that got Charlie her first set of Lingerie?" To which we both buzzed at the same time.

"It was Lillith!" We said simultaneously as steam was coming out of her head.

"Correct! Since you both buzzed at the same time with the same answer I will give 10 points to you both! Now then onto the next questions!"

(N) I'm gonna speed this part up a bit.

5. What's her favorite pizza topping?

Cain: Pineapple! (N) That's gross

6. What's one of the things she hates?

Lucifer: People's Vices!

7. Where does Charlie get her Clothes from?

Cain: Chic boutique, One of the Clothes Designers that I own!

8. Why did Charlie go through her Emo Phase in Junior Highschool?

Cain: The Death of Clark Sinister!

9. What is Charlie's favorite thing to do?

Lucifer: Singing!

10. What was Charlie's best Birthday gift?

Lucifer: Getting Kiki!

And it went on like this for awhile as we kept going at it with a neck to neck pace and finally we came to the final question with us both having 90 points each, all while Charlie was curled up in a ball and unable to show her face.

"Alright folks we are at the final question! And I saved the best question for last! Time for the most spiciest question of them all!" The announcer said as I smirked while Lucifer had a serious look on his face.

"Why so serious old man? Afraid your about to lose?" I say mocking him.

"Not a chance you prick! I'm the only father my daughter needs and not you! So prepare to lose!" He says with a voice filled with determination.

"Final question! Is Charlie Morningstar still a virgin? And if not then who did she lose her virginity to? Now will both contestants write their answers!" We hear the announcer say throwing us a complete curve ball that neither of us new the answer to.

"Charlie's not a Virgin? No way she is definitely one, I can't see her having sex so soon…." Lucifer said to himself but he didn't seem confident in what he was saying.

For me I looked at Charlie, but she was already extremely embarrassed so I couldn't tell if she was embarrassed from this, she wasn't reacting but she is possibly trying to not listen to anything anymore.

So I shifted my eyes to Vaggie who seeing me look at her she blushed and looked away making me raise my eyebrows, which made me instantly use the shadows in Charlie's room to scan it in less than a second which made me smirk before I gave my answer instead.

"And I see both contestants have made there answers! Now show us the results!" He said to which we revealed our answers.

Lucifer: Yes, Charlie is still a Virgin

Cain: No, Vaggie was the one who took Her Virginity

"We have both contestants answers! Now then let's see what the real answer is!" He says pulling out a sealed envelope.

"Charlie is a Virgin! There's no way she'd have sex before getting married!" Lucifer said to which I shrugged.

"Maybe she is, or maybe she decided that she's an adult now and in a relationship so it's fine to have sex with the girl she loves." I say with a smirk back in response.

"And the answer is…." He says as the drumroll plays.

"Charlie's not a Virgin! She lost her virginity last years to Vaggie!!!" He shouted out which made me jump up in the air.

"Hell yeah! I win! In your face Luci, even though you know your daughter you don't know her as best as me!" I said dancing around and rubbing it in his face as confetti was falling everywhere for my victory.

"I wanna die…" Charlie said as she was taken off the pedestal she was on by Vaggie as so many of her embarrassing secrets were revealed to everyone in the hotel.

"It's okay Charlie, let's go take a breather for a bit alright babe?" She says trying to calm the embarrassed Charlie down.

"…. I won't accept this…" Lucifer mumbled as I was dancing around making me stop and hold my hand to my ear as I stood next to him.

"Hmm? What was that? You need to-"

*BASH! THOOM! BOOM!*

In a mere instant I was hit with a massive heavy punch straight to my gut with immense force that it sent me flying across the room before being embedded into the wooden wall from the force alone.

"I WILL NEVER ACCEPT YOU AS-"

*BASH! THOOOOOOM!!!*

Before he could finish his words I had already arrived back at his side in mere moments before smashing my fist against his face before he was sent flying out the front door as I removed my suit before unbuttoning my red shirt as I clenched my fist in anger before the flames of my crown began to manifest around me.

"Uncle Cai-" But before she and Vaggie could intervene, there arms were bound by black tentacles.

"Uhuhuh, We can't have you both get in the way of this fight, besides this is a gentleman's fight, no matter what you say or do will make them stop now, it's best to let them get it out of their system first before you try and intervene." Alastor said as he watched me slowly leave the hotel and step outside as the show was about to start.

*Crack Crack*

I tilt my head and crack it as I watched Lucifer slowly pick himself up while the flames bloomed around me as I raised my fist as I barred my fangs at him.

(Img)

"I think it's time we settle the score old man!"