Keepers

There were about 10 survivors, including Lady Catelyn, when the dust had settled.

"Well, isn't this a colourful bunch?"

Joe marched around, sizing everyone up.

"Ser Rodrik," said Joe, to which Ser Rodrik replied with a nod. Not too animated, as was normal whenever Lady Catelyn was around.

"Ah, if it isn't Bronn!"

Bronn raised a brow, "You know me?"

"I know enough not to fuck with you," Joe said, extending his hand, "The name's Joe."

"Hmm", replied the sellsword, shaking his hand, "A pleasure, I suppose. You must be that white raven everyone's been babbling on about."

"More or less," said Joe, eying the surroundings, "So this is The Vale? It's paler than I imagined. Good thing you lot were travelling ahead of me. I encountered no hillsmen because of it."

Lady Catelyn did not like how the sudden addition of Joe had wholly changed her party's atmosphere. This should be a band that is moving a prisoner. . . But would that be possible with Joe around?

"What are you doing here?" Lady Catelyn asked, as vicious as always.

Joe dismissed the hostility, "Yes, yes, so very pleased to see you also. Robb and the boys are doing fine, by the way. I think the better question is, what are *you* doing here?"

"Excuse me?"

"Well, I'm just curious. Because from where I'm standing, you're starting a war with the Lannisters. I didn't take you for such a fool. A cunt, yes. But not a fool."

Lady Catelyn's blood began to boil, "You insolent-"

"Bastard, yes. Your words were all fine and dandy back home, but out here, I'd choose them more carefully. It's not uncommon for high-born ladies to die on the eastern road."

Tyrion and Bronn gave each other an impressed glance after hearing Joe's savage remarks.

Even though Ser Rodrik didn't think Joe was capable of such skulduggery, he still couldn't let that slide. If he had known Joe would be so disrespectful, he would never have trained him so earnestly. "You forget yourself, Joe! If your father ever heard about this-"

Joe waved his hand casually, brushing off the topic, "If. Anyway, we're spoiling the moment with this kind of talk. We should instead be celebrating a miracle!"

Joe ruffled into the grey cloth he had sashed around him like a makeshift baby carrier, "Tyrion, you're going to love this."

"What is it?" asked Tyrion. Who doesn't like surprises?

That's when Joe took out his 'baby'.

"Behold! Perhaps the only dragon egg in Westeros!"

Joe held up that snow-white egg with specks of blue and red that spiralled on its shell like a tornado of glitter.

Bronn was amazed and couldn't stop his mind from wondering how he could kill everyone in their sleep and make off with the egg.

Lady Catelyn's eyes widened at the sight of the bastard boy holding such a precious item. This just wasn't right. . .

Ser Rodrik damn near had a heart attack, "A d-d-d. . , A d-d-dra-. . "

But none were more so astonished than Tyrion Lannister. He just stood there like a statue, mouth wide open.

"Bahahaha!" Joe laughed, pleased with everyone's reaction. He handed the egg to Tyrion for him to hold.

"It's so hard," Tyrion said, feeling the scaled exterior, "Where did you get this? North of the wall? No. . ."

"Turns out this thing was in the Winterfell crypts all this time. Wow, right? Who would have predicted that one?"

Lady Catelyn didn't like that. "If you found it in the crypts, why isn't it back in Winterfell? You have no right-"

"I have every right," Joe sternly interrupted, "Finders keepers."

Even though Joe had years of resentment toward Lady Catelyn, he had to admit that seeing her so riled up made him feel a little bad, "Relax. You're acting like I'm not family. If you want the egg back, you can place a formal request. My people will process it, and we'll get back to you after a fortnight."

Bronn's instincts started kicking in, "I hate to ruin the family fun, but we'll be getting fooked by more tribesmen if we waste any more daylight."

Ser Rodrik had finished patching himself up, "He's right, my lady. We ought to get a move on"

"Fine," relented Lady Catelyn before giving Joe the death stare, "This conversation isn't over."

Joe rolled his eyes, "Has it ever occurred to you that I'm just a tortured soul that wants your attention? I never had a mother, you know."

"As if I'd give you that much credit."

"Ouch."

Joe chuckled for a bit before mounting Cookie. "Tyrion," he said, "Would you do the honour of keeping the egg safe until we reach The Eyrie? It's gets hard and uncomfortable after a while."

Tyrion stood, still staring at the egg like a child through the glass of a candy store, "It would be my pleasure."

"Good man!"

So it was. The remainder of Lady Catelyn's party mounted up, and together, they set off for The Eyrie.

The entire way there, Tyrion, Bronn, and Joe rode at the back of the party, talking shit and having a laugh.

They were having such a merry time that the ride seemed to pass by quickly, for before they knew it, the castle was in sight.

It was a foreboding combination of towers. If the surrounding mountains were a family, The Eyrie would be the black sheep.

Clouds whiffed about like a mysterious mist around its fine white stone, and the great valley below seemed so very far away from up here.

A band of knights came out of the castle and rode toward the party. The sigil of House Arryn flapped proudly from their banners.

"You're far from home, Lady Stark," greeted the knight at the front.

"To whom do I speak?" asked Lady Catelyn. Speaking to the upper classes came easy to her.

"Ser Vardis Egan," answered he, "Knight of the Vale. Is Lady Arryn expecting your visit?"

"There was no time to send word."

Ser Vardis tilted his head ponderously, "May I ask, my lady, why *he* is with you."

Tyrion didn't even acknowledge the knight. He was too busy using the idle time to look at the egg.

"That's why there was no time," answered Lady Catelyn, "He is my prisoner."

"He doesn't look like a prisoner."

"My sister will decide what he looks like."

To this, Ser Vardis stopped the inquiries, "Yes, my lady. She will at that."

Joe scoffed loudly as Ser Vardis began to turn and lead them to the castle.

"Pfft, yeah, right."

"I'm sorry?" said Ser Vardis, "And who might you be?"

"Ser. Who might you be, Ser" Corrected Joe, "The name is Joe of House Nix, and technically speaking, my friend Tyrion here isn't a prisoner. If he wanted, he could leave this very instant."

Ser Vardis glanced at Lady Catelyn vacantly, "Joe? You mean. . , the-?"

"Forgive him," Lady Catelyn said, "He meant nothing by what he said."

"I meant every word of it," Joe insisted, "What kind of house would it be if I allowed its friends imprisoned?"

"Joe!" Ser Rodrik began to lecture, "Be silent!"

"Alright, alright…" Joe sighed and raised his diplomatic hands, "I was only saying."

Ser Vardis felt inclined to detain Joe, but after an approving (albeit reluctant) nod from Lady Catelyn, he figured it was okay.

To the castle, they rode.

"The Eyrie," said Tyrion, "They say it's impregnable."

Bronn smirked, "Give me ten good men and some climbing spikes, I'll impregnate the bitch."

Joe laughed, "Haha, Bronn and ten good men vs. the world."

All Tyrion could do was shake his head, Bronn continued to impress.

"I like you."