Chapter 2

“You could open your own firm.”

“How many clients would I retain once they learned I’m gay? I’m sorry. I just can’t—” His voice hitched, something Ran would normally rush to make better. Now, though…

“I guess you can’t. What about your things?”

“What…?” Scott looked confused. That expression had always touched something inside Ran, made him want to tumble his lover onto the bed and make love to him until his eyes crossed and he screamed. It still did, but he refused to give in to a useless desire. “Oh, you mean what I brought here. Actually…” He cleared his throat. “Actually, there isn’t much. I packed up my shaving kit while you were sleeping.”

“But your CDs? Your DVDs? The clothes you’ve kept here?” Ran hated how desperate he sounded.

“I’ve been…I’ve been bringing them home gradually.”

“Jesus Christ, Scott! How long have you been planning this?”

“A few months.” He at least had the grace to look abashed.

“You couldn’t have told me sooner?”

“I…I didn’t want to lose you.”

Was that supposed to make Ran feel better?

“I’m so sorry.”

“Sorry doesn’t cut it, Scott. Have you been fucking her?”

“No.” But he flushed a dark red. “I know how you feel about monogamy, and I wouldn’t do that to you.”

No, he’d just rip Ran’s heart out and samba all over it. “Still, I think I’ll get myself tested, just to be on the safe side, you understand.” It was a cheap shot, but he’d never claimed to be an angel. As he hoped, Scott flinched. They’d done without condoms for the past two and a half years.

“I…I hope we can still be friends, Ran. The…uh…wedding is on Valentine’s Day. It’s a Saturday.” He cleared his throat and looked away, unable to hold Ran’s gaze. “Daphne and I would like you to be there. Daphne knows we’re good friends. She’d question it if you didn’t show up.”

Was the man out of his mind? Did he honestly have the nerve to invite Ran?

Ran wanted to ask if Scott was so unhappy with him he wanted to destroy him, but he folded his lips in a tight line and kept the question locked behind his lips.

“I don’t think so, Scott.”

“But—”

“You’ll have to find a way to explain it to your fiancée. Are you ready? In that case, we should go. I have a busy schedule today.” Which now included having Mrs. Campbell, his executive assistant, call the Jaguar dealership to see about returning the convertible. He paused. Scott detested receiving flowers; early in their relationship he’d informed Ran he found it too girly

All right, it was petty, but Ran was going to see to it his…his ex-lover received the biggest, most flamboyant bouquet of roses a local flower shop could provide. White, he thought, and perhaps he’d have them dipped in gold.

* * * *

On Valentine’s Day, two months after that miserable Christmas, Ran decided he’d buried himself in work long enough, that although he was still hurting, he was done licking his wounds. While Scott was honeymooning with his Daphne on Mexico’s Riviera Maya coast, Ran sent a dozen red roses to a blond he’d met at a local watering hole. If he squinted, Lyle even looked a little like Scott.

“I only ask one thing,” he said as he stripped off his clothes and reached for a condom. He’d tested negative, and he intended to see it stayed that way.

“That I love you? Of course, baby.” Lyle gave him a lazy grin.

Ran grimaced. He hated that particular pet name. Scott had used it all the time. “No, that you remain monogamous.”

Lyle looked horrified. “For the rest of my life?” The honeyed tone had left his voice.

“What you do with the rest of your life is your business. While you’re with me, however, I’m the only person you’ll take to your bed. This is nonnegotiable.”

“Of course,” Lyle repeated, smiling as he held out his arms. 2

Parrish Rutledge was so excited he didn’t know what to do with himself. Today was going to be the bestChristmas!

* * * *

He’d always loved this season because of how his mom had made it for him. It had been just the two of them since his brother Darcy had married and moved out five years before. They had chocolates and candy canes, and Mom would bake cookies and cupcakes and frost them with red and green icing. They’d watch a TV marathon of Rudolph and Santa and even Mr. Magoo, and Parrish would snuggle his Beanie Baby bear with its little Santa hat, while Mom sat beside him and shared a plate of cookies.