Meeting Halfway

[Music Recommendation: "In Silence" by Janet Suhh (It's Okay Not To Be Okay OST)-available in Youtube or Spotify] ~ Please listen to it in a loop while you read this part to experience the utmost beauty of this chapter ~

I wanted to answer her so badly… but I wasn't sure if there would be repercussions if I did. I still didn't know how I travelled back in time, and what the rules were if there were any. I couldn't risk it.

"No," I answered her firmly. "I don't know what the future holds. And so do you. None of us do. But what I'm sure of is that I'm happy whenever I write stories. I don't know if I'll be successful, yes, but I don't care. Success is not what I'm aiming for in my life. Instead, I want happiness… happiness from doing my passion and achieving my dream, happiness from being with my family and friends, and maybe with a family that I'll create in the future, too. It's not about having what you think is a reputable profession and earning lots of money."

Yes, if she only knew that in the future, those non-reputable professions that she and lots of people like her thought so lowly of, would not matter anymore. Those "stupid" students who couldn't ace their exams in high school and ended up taking Information Technology or Computer Science as courses because their IQ wasn't high enough to take doctorate or law or engineering, they would rise on top! Because technology would be a booming industry in the future, and those I.T.s and Com-Sci graduates would be highly sought after, gaining one of the highest paid professions! They could even go higher than most doctors or lawyers!

Those who took nursing, because nursing was somehow so popular from parents saying they would earn much, they ended up as my workmates in the call center I worked at in my past life. Yes, because there were too many nurses and not many hospitals who could hire them. Some ended great and went abroad, but the others were left to look for another job that was so unrelated to the course they took in college. And worse, they didn't even like the course. So like me, they suffered taking a job they didn't like in the first place. There were so many scenarios like that. So many unfulfilled potentials. If only the children of before had the courage to stand up to their parent's old way of thinking… then maybe we wouldn't have suffered the consequences of our parent's decisions. I'm not saying all their decisions were wrong. It depends on the whole situation. But for me, I'm positive of what I want in my life.

As for money, if she wanted more, then I should just continue our family business because in the future, what would give you more money than all those reputable professions would either by becoming a celebrity, an influencer, or a business entrepreneur. Trading, online selling and services, real estates, and all businesses-related things would be the key to more money. You just had to be invested, careful, and good at managing your business finances. Another thing was the stock market.

But all in all, success and happiness differs to every person. When I attended reunions in my past life, I noticed how those who lived humbly were happier than those who had more and for a whole lot of reasons. If only mom could understand even just that part…

"You're still too naive," she said. I wanted to say I'm not but she wouldn't believe me.

"Can't you just trust me on this? If I fail then I'll just start over. You can laugh at me all you want and tell me you're right. But for now, just trust me."

"You may be able to start over but time would be against you," Mom said in a mellow tone, and with eyes that seemed to look into nothingness. "You're a woman. By the time you realize you failed, you'd be near 30 years old and need to start a family. If you don't, you'll have problems giving birth and eventually, you'd risk being able to have a family of your own. Once you manage to have a family, you'd be too busy with your children and you won't be able to focus on a career. And in the long run, you won't even have a career and just be a housewife. You'd be lucky if you marry a business owner then maybe you can manage the business with him. But if not ..." She stopped and simply shook her head.

Could it be? Was she telling me the "experience" of her life? That … as a child she tried pursuing her dreams and failed? And it was too late for her to start a career after that? Yes, if I'm not mistaken, mom came from a humble household. It was dad's family who had the whole restaurant chain which he inherited. Then she married dad and had us. She became busy taking care of her children and husband…

Was that what she truly feared? That she didn't want me to end up the same way? She was lucky she married dad. Since he had a business, she could still make a career of managing his other restaurants. But if the same thing were to happen to me, and I wasn't lucky enough to marry someone like dad, then I'll be another case of unfulfilled potential.

Right… I'm a woman. And they said a woman's ultimate role was to give birth and take care of their children. But even so… even if I'm a woman, I want to dream and have my own career. I didn't want to just be a housewife, living off of my husband. I'm not saying being a housewife was bad. As I said, different people, different forms of happiness. But for me, I wanted to fulfill my passion at the very least.

I see… I understand mom a little better now. And she was right. If I failed… time would be against me. And this time around, I wasn't sure if another miracle would help me time travel to undo my mistakes. This time, I would have to be responsible for every choice I make.

Finally understanding my mom, I stood up in my seat and went to her, giving her the biggest and warmest hug I could ever give…

"I'm sorry, mom." As soon as I said that, Mom broke out in tears.