Was A Fool, Always A Fool (edited)

I quietly walked into the room, looking down at the wooden floor.

I can't believe I am nervous.

I'm never nervous.

I'm always fine.

But right now, I rather fall in a deep hole than look at these judgemental eyes.

I was in a boy's school, for goodness sake. Miss Lili squeezed my hand for reassurance. She gave a quick smile. I looked up. They were still staring at me. Their faces were....faceless and emotionless. I couldn't see what they were thinking...

What the hell? I thought this was a boy's school? What's going on here? Did I come into the wrong school? That's what I thought might have been in their minds. And you never know, it just might be that the same thing is running into their minds.

My dad was up on the stage, standing with his hands on the podium. Well, he looked kinda cool. Anyways, he was talking about having a good attendance and normal school things when I walked in. He gave me a quick smile before introducing them to me.

'Boys, she is Cerina-' My dad was going to continue but I interrupted him.

"It's CeCe." I blurted.

Wow, they looked at me the same way.

I looked at all the boys. Some were cute, some were nerdy, some looked like smug, arrogant ones and some were just plain...emotionless guys.

"Okay, CeCe." He looked back at the students. "And she's going to be studying in this school for a few months. And I hope you all will be nice to her." He said strictly. He seemed like a regular teacher when he's with the school.

But when he's with me, he just seems like an apologic father.

"Cerina- I mean, CeCe, why don't you come up here and say something about yourself."

'Shit! What the fuck!? Why did no one told me about this introduction thing!? What am I going to do now...!? Seriously...it was really a bad idea of coming school on first day!' I thought while going near the stage.

I groaned quietly.

Why should I talk about myself?

They will find out about me soon enough anyway.

But there wasn't time to say no.

Everyone waited for me to get on the stage and say something about myself.

I walked up the three steps, hoping I wouldn't slip and stood behind the podium where my dad was standing. I looked at everyone. They all looked puzzled.

You know what, it would be normal if there was some murmuring or giggles. But there was none..not even a single bit of sound..which I didn't really expected. None of it at all.

I cleared my throat before starting.

"Hi, I'm CeCe, as you've already heard. And I came here from US to study. And yeah. That's it really.." I said akwardly. And their face didn't change. But a few of them, gave a little smile. I smiled back. Well, at least that was something...at least few of them gave me some kind of welcoming expression.

"Oh! And I love icecream! Specially chocolate icecream. I mean, I love all the icecreams but it's just that chocolate stands out. I'm not trying to say that I hate the others because the others are really nice too. The least I like is banana. I mean, it's a fruit. It shouldn't be mixed with icecream. I mean, you don't see me mixing rice with smarties. It just isn't right. But still it isn't a crime to have it. So I guess I'm okay-" I was trying to go on but I was interrupted.

"CeCe." My dad called out to me.

Oops, I was rambling again. I looked at the boys to see them looking bored.

Yeah, this is bad.

I walked off the stage and sat beside Miss Lili. She gave me a thumbs up. I gave a quick smile before biting my lip. I don't think being here was a good idea.

I will end up getting mad and hurting people. Or lots of pens..

I know it's weird that I like snapping pens in half when I'm mad. But I just can't help it. Pens are better than snapping people.

I giggled to myself.

Just when I thought not one was going to look at me, all of them did which is also what I didn't expected.

I mouthed 'sorry.' And looked at my hands that were on my lap. Embarrasing...

My dad went on about how cleaning our rooms are important and arriving in class early is also mandatory.

He was a really boring person to be honest. I mean, I should be amazed that I'm with my dad, but how come not even one boy hasn't fallen asleep. Or look sleepy.

"Right. Now you know all the rules and regulations, I'm hoping you don't break any of them. Now any questions?" Dad said at the end. A few people put their hand up but all they were talking about was the after school clubs that are going to be held. Nothing special. Nothing about why a girl is in the school.

"Right, you can all go to your class. Thank you." Everyone moved to the door which I was near. Boys gave me looks. All kind of looks. A bit of them were checking me out, others were disgusted, and others had no idea what was going on. Dad came near me and gave me a paper.

"It's your schedule. I've got your favourite lessons mixed up through the week. The blanks are just free time with Miss Lisa. To help you with your work." He said happily. I gave a fake smile before checking what my first lesson there is.

Ah, Maths.

Awesome.

"Don't worry, you have Maths with me." Miss Lili said. I smiled. Okay, atleast it won't be that awkward.

"You want to come with me to the class?" she asked.

"I'm fine." I said.

It wasn't that I didn't want to go with her, I just wanted to see the place, by myself.

Dad said that there are still 25 minutes remaining before the first lesson starts so I thought I'll just wander around. I glanced at the boys who were staring at me. I gave a little smile. They gave a smile back before laughing about something with their friends.

I sighed.

Here I am and here I will stay.