Chapter 31. Cold
TIMO was never left by Jinny and stayed beside him all night. He didn't even manage to cook for her because she already fell asleep crying with him. He carried her and laid her on his bed, and even if he just cried painfully, he couldn't ignore the heat in his body because he exactly remembered their first night in his bedroom together few years ago.
He took a quick cold shower and laid beside her. Lumuluha ito sa pagtulog habang patuloy na tinatawag ang pangalan ng kaniyang kapatid.
He already knew everything about her when he investigated days ago after that night they first happened. Because he got really curious if why was she so tight as a virgin. There, while investigating, he came to know the truth between his late sister and the one who caught his heart.
Napalunok siya nang mapansin ang matinding panginginig nito. He wasn't the only one who's hurting, Jinny was hurting, too. And she might be scared that the killer may find them.
But he would never allow that. He failed to protect his loved ones before and he'd never let that happen anymore.
"Shh... baby, don't worry..." anas niya at niyakap ito saka maingat na hinaplos-haplos ang likuran. "I will protect you at all cost. I'm going to protect Luella, too... Even if it'll cost my life."
When he kissed the top of her head, she slowly stopped trembling and her breathing became normal, until he felt her hugging him back as she was still asleep.
That memorable night, he fell asleep embracing her as if he could be stronger with that simple gesture. It's as if it was enveloping each other's scars.
After that revelation, he felt alive than he could ever feel. He also knew that Jinny already deduced that he's her late best friend's brother—since he's living as Timo Estacio. But, then, she's still not telling him anything about that thing, so he chose to keep silent as well. If she didn't want to tell him about Luella, then, he would continue pretending not knowing everything.
Nang malaman niya ang lahat noon ay bigla niyang naalala nang una niyang makita ang batang babae... Hindi man iyon lukso ng dugo, dahil hindi naman niya tunay na kadugo ang mga Estacio, ay naramdaman niya ang kakaibang koneksyon kay Luella. And her eyes... they looked exactly as Tami's.
Inaamin niyang naging higit pa kaysa nakababatang kapatid ang turing niya kay Tami noon, pero hanggang lihim na pagtingin lamang iyon, marahil ay gaya kay Orange, ay naghahanap siya ng kalinga para matabunan ang hinagpis niya sa namayapang tunay na mga magulang noon. Natigil lang siya sa pag-iba-iba ng nagugustuhan mula nang makilala niya si Jinny. That was why his heart was telling him she's truly the right one, and he should never let her go.
He then remembered Tami...
Pumikit siya para huwag nang gaanong isipin ang bagay na iyon, at pilit na inalala ang masasayang alaalang kanilang pinagsaluhan.
Nang gabing iyon ay hindi man lang nagawang maging maligaya ni Timo sapagka't bukod sa nag-breakdown siya ay kinain siya ng matinding konsensya dahil sa mga pagtatago niya ng sikreto kay Jinny, pero ipinagpapasalamat niyang nangyari iyon. Dahil natutunan niyang kailangang matanggap niya ang lahat para tuluyang makalaya sa nakaraan.
Another thing why he chose to keep it secret, too, was because he couldn't afford to lose Jinny so he'd continue living as Timo. At isa pa, magiging komplikado ang lahat kung lilitaw siya sa madla. Baka hindi siya paniwalaan, at masisira ang matagal na nilang pina-planong pabagsakin ang AIA at ang mga Devila.
And he's not regretting any of it. He had an amazing start of his relationship with Jinny as an official couple and it's better to keep it that way.
Sa kaparehong taon ay nakapagpundar ito ng sasakyan para sa tatay nito subalit hindi naman daw mahilig sa sasakyan ang nakatatanda. That, he couldn't believe at first. He thought that all boys and all men loved cars though.
"Mas gusto ko iyong mountain bike na niregalo sa 'kin ng fans ninyo noon."
Nasamid siya sa isiniwalat ng ama nito dahil siya ang nagbigay niyon. Natawa naman nang bahagya si Jinny. Mukhang hindi pa nito naikwento ang bagay na iyon sa mga magulang nito.
Nasa munting sala sila ng apartment na tinutuluyan ng mga Canciller, pinanonood lang naman nila ang paboritong cartoons ni Luella. Katatapos lang kasi nilang kumain ng tanghalian.
Sabado iyon at pareho silang walang schedule ni Jinny kaya pinili nilang maglagi roon nang maka-bonding na rin si Luella. She's a big girl already. Sooner or later, he would start having headaches about her suitors to be.
Ngumuso siya habang naiisip ang mga maaaring mangyari habang lumalaki ang bata. She's turning five soon and would be sent to a kindergarten school. Ngayo'y sa day care ito pumapasok at hatid-sundo ng lola nito.
He's somehow glad that Jinny decided to keep the truth. He's kind of contented for Luella, being taken care of this great and much loving family. But of course, he still wanted to tell his woman about everything. Gusto niyang magpakatotoo rito gaya nang kung gaano siya katotoo sa damdamin para rito.
"Nagugutom ka na naman ba? Ang tahimik mo," bulong nito sa kaniya't napansing niyang sumulyap si Luella. She pressed her right forefinger on her small lips, signalling her mom to kep quiet.
Hindi niya napigilan ang pagtawa dahil nakakatuwa itong tingnan. Siya naman tuloy ang sinenyasan nito.
"Keep quiet, Tito, watch pa po tayo."
He pursed his lips but he's still smiling. Luella gave up calling him 'Tito Timo', palagi itong nabubulol pagka't nakasanayan na.
Jinny stood up and glanced at him. Tila niyayaya siya.
"We'll just buy ice cream, sama ka sa 'min, 'nak."
Umiling ang bata at napailing na lang din ang mga magulang ni Jinny dahil mukhang hindi talaga maiistorbo si Luella sa panonood.
"Sige na, kami nang bahala kay Luella," taboy sa kanila ng mama nito.
He smiled embarrassingly and slightly bowed his head. Naalala niya noong gabing unang beses na magpunta ni Jinny sa tinitirhan niya at hindi niya ito naihatid nang maaga dahil umaga na niya itong hinatid. He noticed her mom slightly disliked what he did but he didn't hear a thing from her. Instead, she asked if were they just alright. Mukhang nahalata ng ginang ang pangangalum-mata nila ng anak nito, at nakitaan ng pag-alala para sa kanila.
"Bilhan ninyo ako ng ube flavor kung mayroon," habilin ng ina ni Jinny na nagpabalik sa atensyon niya sa mga ito.
"Opo," magalang niyang tugon at bahagyang tumango.
Jinny went to get something in their room, when she got back, she's wearing a long cardigan. Mas mainam, hindi na nakahantad ang braso't legs nito dahil romper shorts na walang sleeves ang suot nito.
They really bought ice creams only and the store was just few meters away from the apartment building. But Jinny held his hand to pull him somewhere when they were supposed to be heading back. At nagpagiya naman siya.
Tumapat sila sa isang bakanteng lote, malapit lamang iyon sa gusali ng tinitirhan ng mga ito.
"Why are we here, baby? Tirik ang araw, o," kunwaring reklamo niya. She licked her vanilla ice cream in cone before speaking. Hindi tuloy niya naintindihan ang sinabi nito dahil natulala siya sa bibig nitong abala sa pagkain ng ice cream. And her tongue... Fuck! Why was he feeling that way under the sun?
"Hoy, hindi ka naman yata nakikinig!" singhal nito at dinilaan ang labing nalagyan ng ice cream. Napalunok siya't idinampi naman ito ang kinakaing ice cream sa bibig niya. "Nakakaloka ka!"
He chuckled and snaked his arms on her waist as he licked his lips..
"Ang sarap pala ng ice cream, 'no?" Lalo na kung nadilaan mo na.
Siya na rin ang nagpatuloy sa pagkain ng tirang ice cream nito na para bang ito ang kinakain niya—'Tangina. Tirik na tirik ang araw pero ang nasa isip niya'y halos manirik ang mga mata ni Jinny habang nakaubabaw siya rito at pinaliligaya ito nang husto.
Minura niya ang sarili, mabuti at hindi niya iyon sinabi ng malalas dahil nakakahiya kay Jinny. Baka isipin nito, wala siyang pakialam sa sinasabi nito dahil puro pagnanasa ang tumatakbo sa utak niya.
"...so, what do you think? Isn't it a great location? Malapit sa lahat ng kailangan."
Huh? Hindi niya napakinggan ng maayos ang sinabi nito.
"I'm talking about this land! Timo naman, eh, nakakainis ka na. I was saying that the renovations of our old house are almost done. At binabalak kong bilhin itong bakanteng lote pagkatapos niyon," she patiently repeated what she had said. That house she's pertaining to was the one in her hometown.
Kaagad naman siyang tumanggi. He'd been thinking on how to give her the house and lot he bought before. He guessed it was the right time. Maybe he'd ask for someone to pretend as a broker and he'd recommend that person to Jinny, and he'd tell the person to inform Jinny that the previous owner migrated, and selling the house for a very low price. Ayaw niyang tumanggap ng bayad pero kung sakaling bilhin nito ang bahay na ireregalo sana niya para rito, ay ilalaan niya ang perang babayaran ni Jinny para sa future ni Luella.
He was thinking of someone he could ask to act as the broker when she continued talking.
"Bakit naman hindi? Look, I know I should be grateful that we're living in that apartment for free for years now, pero, gusto ko rin namang lumipat ang mga magulang ko. At dito ko nga balak na pagawan ng bahay sina inay at itay kasi nga palagay na sila rito. May mga kaibigan na rin..."
Ah, so it's for her parents. Alright, then. He must wait for another few years so he could finally give her that house.
"Ano? Sa tingin mo, okay na rito?"
"Matutuwa sila kapag nalaman nila ang plano mo," he commented but he slightly slapped his right arm.
"Don't tell them about it yet! Gusto kong kapag nabili ko na, 'tsaka ko sasabibin. Pero baka matagal-tagal pa. Mag-iipon muna ulit ako," anito at napangiti siya nang mapansing tuwang-tuwa ito sa ideyang mapapasaya nitong lalo ang mga magulang nito.
At siya naman ang magpapasaya rito.
They went back and the ice cream was already melting. Inilagay muna iyon sa freezer at nang gabi na'y naging dessert nila ang naka-latang chocolate ice cream na binili nila kanina, at anh ube flavor para sa ina nito.
Natulog si Luella sa silid ng mag-asawa at naiwan sila ni Jinny sa sala. Hindi sila kaagad na natulog at inabutan pa ang late night news. Habang nanonood ay napansin niyang bumusangot si Jinny.
Umakbay siya rito para mayakap.
"Nanunulis ang nguso mo, kagatin ko iyan, eh."
She only rolled her eyes.
Ano'ng nangyari?
"Tutok na tutok iyang mga mata mo sa TV, ha? Gusto mo ipasok kita sa screen?"
They were watching the TV. So it's only natural for him to stare at the screen, right? Though he preferred to stare at her all night, pero baka hindi lang titig ang magawa niya rito kung mangyari iyon. He smirked with that thought. He couldn't wait to make love to her but he'd still patiently wait.
"Type mo pa rin ba siya?"
"Huh?" He scowled.
"Iyang ex mo!" she's almost shouting.
Nawala ang pagkakunot niya nang makuha ang sinasabi nito. Damn, hindi naman niya ex-girlfriend and news anchor na iyon—ah, yes, ex ng totoong Timo. And when he tried to get closer to Liann before so he could probably change her impression about the Timo she knew, she got mad. And then he found out about what happened. Siya ang nahiya na pinilit niyang makipaglapit dito nang hindi inalam ang buong sitwasyon.
Napahilot sa sentido si Jinny. "I know I shouldn't be mad. But I am mad, Timo. Why were you such a jerk before? Bree told me this Ate Girl is an old friend of hers, and also your history with her. You... You..."
He kissed her to shut her up. "I love you..." he uttered.
"I love you, too, pero gago ka pa rin."
He didn't want to chuckle but he did. Jesus! She's so adorable when she's sulking.
"I mean, before. You're so gago."
"Shh... I'm watching," pang-aasar niya.
"Magpakasasa ka sa kaniya!" Tumayo ito't akmang lalayasan siya pero hinila niya't napaupo ulit sa kaniyang tabi tabi.
"Umuwi ka na nga. Baka maisumbong pa kita sa tatay ko nang wala sa oras. Tingnan ko lang kung makalabas ka pa rito nang gwapo ka pa rin."
"I'm handsome, eh?" Ngumisi siya dahil hindi niya naririnig na pinupuri siya ni Jinny. Though, she's making him feel like he's the most handsome person in the world, it's still a different feeling to hear those words. Kasehodang sarkatisko pa ang pagkakasabi nito.
"Sus! You just wanted to hear more praises. Ang gwapo mo, ang macho mo, ang lakas ng karakas mo. Okay na?"
He blinked his eyes. Was she really jealous? 'Coz that's how he's feeling when she said those words sarcastically.
Needlessly, he still told her that everything was all in the past.
"I know." She pouted right after. "And I'm glad you've matured in a better way. Kampante na akong hindi mo ako lolokohin."
Nakangiti man ay kinabahan siya. Kahit hindi naman siya nagloko, pakiramdam niya ay niloko niya ito nang gabing angkinin niya ito.
Napamura siya sa sarili. Bakit ba niya naalala iyon? Umalinsangan bigla at alam na alam niya ang dahilan.
"I've to go, it's already late."
"Dito ka na lang matulog. Sa sofa."
He groaned to protest.
"Ay, ang arte pala ng boyfriend ko. Gusto pa sa kama. Sige na, roon ka sa kama ko."
"Damn it, Jinny, you're making it hard for me."
"Huh?" Lito nitong hinuli ang mga titig niya. "Why's it hard for you? Sa kama ka na nga, eh, ako na rito sa sofa tutal kakasya naman ako."
Was she serious? He titled his head and stared at her for a while. Yes, she really meant it. Damn, her innocence sometimes was making him feel like he's a slave for sex. He's picturing that they're on top of her bed and making love already, and yet, she didn't have any clue about those dirty and sensual things in his mind.
"Kasi baka pagod ka, o inaantok. Paano kung makatulog ka habang nagmamaneho?"
He chuckled lightly. He couldn't believe he first thought that she was insinuating. He sighed and enveloped her in his arms. Siya lang yata ang matinding nagnanasang maangkin ito.
"I thought you wanted to sleep with me. I'm sorry—"
"Gusto ko nga." Natigilan siya't nag-angat naman ito ng tingin. "Pero baka kasi nakakahiya kila nanay... Sa susunod na lang. 'Pag mag-asawa na tayo."
Hindi siya makapaniwalang narinig niya mismo ang katagang iyon kay Jinny.
"Kinilig ka, 'no?" panghuhuli nito sa kaniya.
"More than that," anas niya. Now, he couldn't hide his hard on. "I am glad we're on the same page, baby..."
Napaiwas ito ng tingin at alam na niya kung bakit. Napansin na nito ang bukol sa gitna niya.
"Halika na sa kwarto?" nakangising bulalas niya. He's just kidding about asking her to go to bed with him though.
"Sige... M-mag-iingat ka sa pagmamaneho."
Humalakhak siya nang mapagtantong wala ang isip nito sa kaniyang sinabi. Inakala nitong nagpaalam na siyang umuwi.
At umuwi rin naman kaagad siya. 'Coz he exactly felt he badly needed a cold shower.