I walked to the pond in Yun manor garden to look at summer flower there. Lotus flowers are blooming there. The pink color contrasts with the pool water which is slightly dirty. However, the scenery looks beautiful.
No wonder a Confucian scholar Zhou Dunyi wrote, 'I love the lotus because while growing from mud, it is unstained.'
Everyone has their own interpretation of his words. In my opinion, his words has a deep meaning. Someone who is purified in suffering. Just like a lotus flower that grows from mud.
After getting a second chance to live, my thoughts changed slightly. In the past, I always complained and angry when somethings didn't happen like I want. I don't hesitate to vent my anger to my servants. Especially to Ling. Therefore, many servants don't like me.
Now, I don't vent my anger and resentment to them. I tried to be calm. If something didn't happen like I want, I choose to be quiet in my room until I feel calm.
When I was watching the lotus flower, I heard the footsteps of someone who running towards me. I raise my head and see Ling running towards me. I stood up and wait her to arrive. Ling breathed hardly before talking.
"Miss, there is a guest from the Palace. Master sent everyone to the main hall, "Ling said with a panicked face. Her words and expression worried me.
"Who?" I asked her.
"Eunuch Zhu," Ling answered my question. I immediately remembered the face of an old man who had become Bixia's right-hand man. The old eunuch would only come to visit a noble family to convey something very important. My heart is getting anxious. I feel afraid that Bixia (emperor) would give my family a new punishment because my suicide attempt.
"Let's go to there!" I asked her and walked quickly to the Yun manor main hall.
In the main hall, everyone had gathered. My father was sitting on the ground in first place. My mother, young brother and all our servant sitting on the ground behind my father. I go to the place behind my mother. Directly sit on the ground.
Eunuch Zhu stood in front of us. I can see that he bring a golden manuscript roll in his hand. I was a little relieved because the color of that's manuscript roll. The gold color shows that the contents are good. If Bixia give punishment him, he will write it on a black roll.
"I will start reading messages from Bixia," Eunuch Zhu gave a signal. All of usimmediately prostrate.
"Bixia said that he considered that Yun family have a lot of contribution for Kingdom. Bixia wanted to build a more closer relationship with Yun family. Because it, Bixia want to bestowed Yun family's second daughter, Yun Xia He with the fifth Prince, Xiao Junwangye (prince rank two), "Eunuch Zhu continued his words.
"We thank the Bixia. Hopefully Bixia is given a long life by Heaven, "my father answered immediately after Eunuch Zhu ended his words. The whole hall followed my father's words.
"Hopefully Bixia will live for a thousand years," we all said the same thing. Even though my heart isn't happy to hear his words.
After that, a banquet was held to honor Eunuch Zhu. I saw my father's face at a glance, when he was talk and talk with Eunuch Zhu. His face looks calm. His expression made me curious. Is my father feel happy if I married Bixia's son who is famous for his nickname, Waste Prince?
***
It was late when the banquet was over. My father company Eunuch Zhu to walk to the front of manor gate. He stand there until Eunuch Zhu was not seen anymore. My mother, my younger brother and me are waiting for my father in his study room.
I had spent two cups of tea when my father arrived. He looks calm. There was no tired expression on his face. My mother immediately poured tea into the cup and gave it to my father after he sat down.
"I was very surprised when Eunuch Zhu suddenly arrived. I think he will bring Bixia's message in the form of punishment for our family. Thank Heaven, that didn't happen, "my father said after drinking his tea. He looked at my mother with a gentle gaze.
"What do you think?" My father asked my mother.
"I didn't expect Bixia to give a marriage decree to Xia He. Like you, my husband, I thought that Bixia sent a message of punishment, "my mother said.
"Our two daughters are royal daughters-in-law. Our first daughter became Huangtaizifei and our second daughter became Wangfei (prince's wife). It's a grace for our family, "my mother continued her words and smiled. I looked at my parents with a look of disbelief. Why do they looks happy? Have they never heard rumors about that prince?
I often hear rumors about Xiao Junwangye.
People say that Xiao Junwangye brought a bad sign because his mother died one day after gave birth to him.
People say that Xiao Junwangye is a prince who is stupid for not being able to read.
People say that Xiao Junwangye is a weak prince because he never joined Bixia hunting.
They made the nickname Waste Prince for him bacause that's point. Of course they wouldn't dare to say that in front of Bixia.
I didn't expect Bixia to bestowed me to his useless son. Is this the way Bixia punishes me? After I was considered a shameless woman, would I also be called Waste Prince Consort? Doesn't that sound terrible?
"Xia He, what do you think?" My mother broke my thoughts with her question. I look at her nervously. Finally I brave myself to look at my father.
"Father, I'm begging you to reject this decree. I don't want to marry Xiao Junwangye!" I begged my father. My father's expression which at first calm turned angry. His face turned red.
"Why are you saying that, Xia He?" My mother asked. Her face showed anxiety. I knew that my mother was afraid that my father would get angry. However, I can't act if I'm happy and accept the decree.
"Mother, I heard a lot of rumors about Xiao Junwangye. People say that he is stupid and weak. I can't be his wife. I don't want to be called Waste Prince Consort, "I said quietly and in a low voice. As I feared, my father immediately hit the table hard.
"You!" My father pointed at me with his finger. A sign of his anger at me.
"Fengyin, take a bamboo stick," my father ordered my younger brother. I already knew that it would be like this if I protested.
"My husband, please understand Xia He. She just recovered. Her mind is not clear now, "my mother begged him while holding my father's hand. She try to stopped my father actions.
"She has been shameless. Bixia has been pleased to marry her to Xiao Junwangye. Who wants to marry a woman with a bad reputation like her? But look! She instead says our prince is a waste prince, " he shouted. I bow my head.
"I better not get married and be single until death than marry Xiao Junwangye," I insisted. My dad hit his desk again.
"This child doesn't know himself! Like or dislike, agree or disagree, you will marry Xiao Junwangye, "my father gave an irrefutable decision. My father immediately left the study room after kicking his chair down. My younger brother followed my father.
"Xia He, you can't be like this. You know, even if we don't like it, we can't reject the Emperor's decree, "my mother said to me in a soft voice. She held my hand tightly.
"Xia He, you also shouldn't immediately believe other people's words. If their words have no proof, that is rumor. We must not immediately believe in rumors because rumors are often wrong, "my mother said again. I forced myself to nod.
I was forced to accept this marriage decree.
My tears fell. Imagine the insults I will receive after marriage. Why do so many bad things happen in my life? I tried to kill myself to curse Jing Fei. However, now, it's as if I'm being cursed by Jing Fei.