DaoistK5x1cr

I won't be leaving a review yet since I'm obviously at the beginning of this novel, but my God author...please proof read your work before posting, because it is exhausting correcting your writing mistakes in my head as I'm reading. I'm here to enjoy a novel, not participate in a reading comprehension test. if you must, run your chapters through an online grammar tool or something if you're too busy to fix them yourselves or screw it use Chatgpt, anything to make it easier to read. I don't know why no one else is complaining about this, maybe I'm just too dumb to use quick corrections in my head without hampering my enjoyment of reading your novel, but I'm seriously hoping this issue gets resolved in the future. Otherwise, I'm dropping. Fun story though so far, I guess.

Tone the humor down. When people constantly make jokes in tense moments it severely undercuts the tone. I'm not saying it's not funny, but there's a time and place for it, and tbh sometimes it is very unfunny to me. The constant ridiculous over-the-top simile-based hyperbolic humor completely overstays its welcome. The idiotic gen z humor can be fine at some points, but horribly annoying when characters say things like "anime protagonist moment" or "character arc" nonsense in like 80% of their dialogue. It'd be fine if it was just Raven doing it, but why are others using these 21st century terminology? I don't see a "Gag" tag next to this novel, so why? I do really like the story and characters, and the author is very competent at writing poignant moments or fast paced battles. Its all really good but the humour just drags it down soo much. I really do hope this feedback gets through, because once again, the banter is funny but you gotta space 'em out and you HAVE TO find an appropriate time and place to play the funny stuff.