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Pocket_AI

Lv2
2023-10-25 JoinedGlobal
0.5h

of reading

170

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23
  • Pocket_AI14 days ago
    Posted

    Why did you make him 13-year-old? Negotiations with business partners, renting house... Who will even talk to a child about chat? Story itself is 2-3/5, not terrible, but just not interesting.

  • Pocket_AIa month ago
    Posted

    At that point just write p*rn. Finished 6 chapters, no desire to continue. Reasons: - too much mentions how handsome mc is - meaningless scenes with school bullies. Who cares about them? WOW, mc with cheats is stronger that normal humans, who could have guessed. - info repeats itself

  • Pocket_AI3 months ago
    Replied to Wizened

    Yep, with good story, dialogues and not much bullshit. My favourites just happens not to be on this website)

  • Pocket_AI3 months ago
    Posted

    4/10 1. Overly descriptive everything. 2. Text style changes from time to time which means inconsistency at best, AI at worst. 3. The whole Italian mafia idea seems dull and artificial with - return to the 1 - unnecessary descriptions. 4. POV of other characters are, again, dull, artificial and AI-like. To the people who give it 5 stars for "smart" mc - he is not smart, he's not an idiot at best.

  • Pocket_AI4 months ago
    Posted

    Bad. Just bad. Dialogues are boring, chinese stuff is as dumb as always (Heavenly technics, constant brother/sister bullshit), imbalance template with Imbalance weapon at the beginning is not surprising. Please, read something not as atrocious as plain cultivation fics and then write.

  • Pocket_AI4 months ago
    Posted

    HALF of everything in this story is just infodump of useless information. Why do you need to waste your and others time by giving detailed information about thing that you don't even use in the story? Considering there are other reviews with info about you making chapters to just increase word count - answer is obvious.

  • Pocket_AI4 months ago
    Posted

    Grammar is really bad. If you can imagine a mistake - you will find it here. Story is in random state due to a number of characters which author handles poorly.

  • Pocket_AI4 months ago
    Posted

    It's just another chinese fic where mc immediately picks up girls and become everyone's best friend in 10 seconds. Of course, he is also instantly rich and you need to know how luxurious and expensive his car is.

  • Pocket_AI4 months ago
    Posted

    It's ok, but some problems are obvious. 1. ! in the end of EVERY sentence. That's not how people speak. A lot of things from chinese fics must be fixed - that's one of them. 2. Constant use of Brother/sister between non-relatives. Again, that's not how people in HP speak. 3. Dialogues sometimes feel extremely artificial. Example: ALL things that veelas-kids say. How can I, Ethan, be bothered with making dialogues good?

  • Pocket_AI4 months ago
    Posted

    1. It's really unremarkable. Just another OP mc story with bad writing. 2. Why do you skip 2 lines instead of 1 like normal people? Wtf is this? 3. Alexander is not a surname, it's a name. You have mc with 2 names, congratulations.