congrats on the new cover.

he's hot?

I feel like it should be immortal.

is- is his actual name ???

Author, i don't think you'll need to edit it. it's fairly decent

pretty interesting, and excellent writing quality. i really like where the story is going, the first chapters really got me hooked. can't wait to read more.

Might change this later but i like how the story is progressing so far. i can't really judge yet since it's pretty early on in the story, but i have a feeling it will be an interesting story. Grammar and spelling and overall writing quality is pretty good a bit better than your standard novels. There is some inconstancies in the perspectives like it randomly changed into first perspective but i'm assuming that's bc it was meant to be his thoughts? idk. i'm interested in the MC who has yet to be named, because the system seems to be confused about him. i think this story is worth checking out, but like i said, it's too early to judge.

ew kids

that's a random change of perspective..

We don't even know YOUR name- Author did you not have his name yet or? Because for the profile thingy his name is a literal ???

With a child on his back???

Plot armour 😒

I like TT.

Time traveller? That's random

NO WHY?? IT'S ONLY THE SECOND CHAPTER AS WELL??

same bro- same