also i have a tiny suggestion (it is just from my personal preference)
i think you should use more paragraph brakes.
i dont know how to describe it but it feels fresher to read it that way
(again only a personal preference, do what you are comfortable with 👍)
....damn you are doing great for a first novel
and it is also one of the newer good ones i have read for now.
i hope you finish this potential of a story to its end🗿