vimbaimurindagomo
I am Christian and have previously worked as a scriptwriter. In 2022 my short film, Bewitched won prize at the annual, Zimbabwe International Film Festival(ZIFF). I enjoy, reading, chess and swimming.
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Thank you very much for the review, much appreciated. I hear your concern hence the use of inverted commas" to denote dialogue apart from narration. As for the concept I would be happy to explain it to you if you like. Please take a look at my other book, THUNDERDOM Trilogies, https://www.webnovel.com/book/thunderdom-trilogies_24939745906620705.
It's a very fast paced powerful story that grips the imagination. I noticed though a couple of anomalies which I did not want to point out on the general chat. Namely a weakness with regard to diction. In chapter 32 there is a line where you say"...left chest..." The same anomaly is repeated again in another passage. Maybe you wanted to say, "left hand side of his chest". All the same notwithstanding you have an amazing story which fully immerses the reader in the fast moving story. I advise you take time to proof read your work. Congratulations on producing an outstanding masterpiece and I wish you well at the premiere of your book. Well done.
It's a beautifully simple plot, with good pace. It takes the reader through the daily routine of our antagonist in a very lively, engaging manner. Which brings the character's world to life, allowing the reader to get to familiarise with their personality. Your discriptions, fluency and use of simple English to make it easy for the reader to easily fall in love with the plot, is pure genius. I notice though that you started chapter 1 by just leaving Aaron Anderson hanging making me want to ask, is that the name of our protagonist? I also noted in chapter1that you opened the account by relating your character in the first person instance, but later on at the end of chapter 1 you switch to relate to your character in the third person instance. Otherwise the book is quite a good read.
Thank you very much. I 'm much obliged to you. I originally wrote NOBLE BEAST as a short story years back while living in South Africa. I only turned it into a broader length manuscript late last year, back in my native Zimbabwe. However I am now exploring the possibility of extending the book due to popular demand. As for the cover I 'm not good at designing so I just used one of my photos.
Great plot I love the way you unfold your story. It's also got well paced. Doubtless this is a brilliant piece of work. I notice a few deficiencies though regarding diction. There is a line in chapter1 where you say, "...I put on a shower..." You could have said,"... take a shower...I stead. It's not the only line. I would advise that you work with someone who is proficient in the English language. Apart from that I love your work. Keep up the high standard.
Than you for the review. I am taking your input into consideration and exploring options of how I can take the story forward. I had initially written, Noble Beast as a short story revolving around the cocktail party scene but again due to encourage from others, surprised myself and managed to expand it into a broader manuscript.
Well written compelling story. I have enjoyed reading the first chapter. This language is simple making it easy for any reader to follow the story.
A compelling lovestory that draws in the reader right from chapter 1. It speaks to the author's prowess with the language and diction Well done Anthony's Lee Nguyen. You have produced a master piece in Book of spells.