The first chapter is intense already. Poor Kaede.

I thought I was the same as Jujutsu Kaisen (Sorry Author but I am an avid fan of that Anime) but when you read further and further, the story is different and it doesn't even have similarity with the anime. It's a whole new level of story. Like wow. It would be good if this will be Drawn in manga or comics. The cover matches the story inside and I am impressed. This is a fresh story with a great potential. Keep it going Author.

As a reader, writing quality is a matter for me. In your first chapters, there are some errors that I found and I immediately question myself if I'll continue to read it or not. The first thing is to always start your sentence with a capital letter. Some of your sentences are fragments with grammatical errors. I don't know. I was captured by the cover and I thought I should give it a try but the first chapter is disappointing. I suggest you, please edit it rather than add more chapters of it. And please improve your thought about the story because I can see that some of what you write scattered i to different directions. I hope you'll accept a criticism from a reader. Sorry I don't sugar coat review. If you want to impress readers, impress us with good writings .