Pls take your time to write tis. It was okay in the beginning but the grammar got worse this last two chapters

The grammar got a bit worse

honestly from the beginning this whole mute thing has made no sense, why make him unable to talk it just seems unnecessary

why are these two friends ?

Why exactly can't he talk?

How does it switch from a cemetery to a prison?

I'm not really where ur going with this story

Okay, pls stop the character from laughing every time it makes no sense

Just let them be curse techniques it will be to confusing otherwise

Work on your grammar a bit, apart from that sounds interesting

I'm more curious on what he is going to to do with mai since maki is dead now

Can u pls explain the anti skill technique I don't get it

When is it going to get to canon?

sounds interesting pls Update soon

I tried giving your story a shot but the grammar is just terrible pls work on it

Also pls work on your grammar a bit

The way u described how he fighting cursed spirit and the taunt the first time was fine but then I did the exact same scene again and the exact same taunt again multiple times u just worded differently I recommend reading murim manhwa or hunter manhwa to give u an idea of good fight scenes

Just trying putting in the comments

but where are u getting this abilities from ? the void form, the time skip, the dog monster, that ability that shadow has, you created a game that doesn't exist or have a real world reference which is closely related to jujutsu kaisen which means u can just give him any power that can bail out him out of trouble with the excuse that he is game avatar because u haven't explained the game mechanics

like everything? u keep giving new abilities out of know where from a game that doesn't exist