The_Open_Sky

Keep the good work up author! But a word of advice, I think you need some larger chapters and paragraphs too.

Ah sorry, I'm actually rewriting some of the chapters at the moment to balance heavy description with narrative. Following that really helpful honest review is what I'm doing right now, and thank you as well for leaving these comments. They tell me what to improve as an author :D from someone who could clearly write better dialogue than me haha

Shameless Author Review. Gotta say that my writing style is very detail heavy and as an author I'm still learning to balance that or even enhance the plot with that. Thanks to an honest reviewer, shout-out of @Taufiqulalam, I think I've learned a thing or two to stop my strength as a heavy detail writer from being a weakness. So for all you with short fuses, give it a try, I promise you my isekai ain't generic.

Honestly, reading this is a good way for me as another author to learn how to write better. The author here shows her ability to craft enjoyable scenes and dialogue without falling into the trap of minimalism or being so descriptive that the story is a bit slow. I envy the author for this and when she said her writing ability improved, I totally believe it.It's also refreshing to also see a more western style story here. So give the author a good read, I promise you you'll enjoy it.

Honestly, I'm jealous on how you could write this. My writing style is heavy detail but I'm so so bad at dialogue aaaa.

Well noted, thank you very much for the honest feedback. I now know what to fix.

How about now? This much detail isn't weird right lol.

sure haha. I'll add some more detail, I was worried it might be a bit too weird if I overdescribed lol.

idk why but I imagined a K-pop type of guy lol

As a reader, I think the novel's premise is quite unique and it has a lot of potential. I hope my review could be the one to open up that potential because there seems to be a whole world that can be built out of this by the Author. My first recommendation is that I think the author could make the setting more fleshed out, in terms of writing style. I think that the author should invest more sentences in descriptions of the scenes. Paint the world in more colors so to speak, because although the dialogue is great I personally think it should be matched with great description as well so that the novel could be visualized better. My second recommendation is more show, less tell. An example I want to highlight is from the prologue, where the professor doesn't trust his student. I think it could be fleshed out better by describing the memory fragments in more detail, and more examples of the professor's disbelief and why he disbelieves so. I think doing that would make the complexity of the setting more appreciated. These are my two cents and I hope they're helpful Author! I hope to see you grow!