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Iceknith

Iceknith

Lv2
2021-08-05 JoinedGlobal
12.3h

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166
  • Iceknith
    Iceknith6mth
    Commented

    I think you meant "since he *did* not *know*'

    This paragraph has been deleted.
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    No More Fantasy
    Fantasy · Retsag
    detail
  • Iceknith
    Iceknith6mth
    Commented

    I think you meant "to 18H" and not "too 18H"

    This paragraph has been deleted.
    altalt
    No More Fantasy
    Fantasy · Retsag
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  • Iceknith
    Iceknith6mth
    Commented

    I don't know if "whole of today" is an error or a valid expression, but I sure don't know it, and it seems odd

    This paragraph has been deleted.
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    No More Fantasy
    Fantasy · Retsag
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  • Iceknith
    Iceknith6mth
    Commented

    I think you meant "while look*ing* down"

    This paragraph has been deleted.
    altalt
    No More Fantasy
    Fantasy · Retsag
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  • Iceknith
    Iceknith6mth
    Commented

    I think you forgot to erase the "climbed on top of it", because now it spells "climbed it climbed on top of it like a cat"

    This paragraph has been deleted.
    altalt
    No More Fantasy
    Fantasy · Retsag
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  • Iceknith
    Iceknith6mth
    Commented

    I think you meant "running like *a* beast"

    This paragraph has been deleted.
    altalt
    No More Fantasy
    Fantasy · Retsag
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  • Iceknith
    Iceknith6mth
    Commented

    Sorry to be always so negative about, an otherwise great story, but wouldn't it be better to not repeat "absurdly" in this paragraph. You could maybe replace one of them with an "extremely" or "gigantic"

    This paragraph has been deleted.
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    No More Fantasy
    Fantasy · Retsag
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  • Iceknith
    Iceknith6mth
    Commented

    I think you forgot the "head" in "she lowered her *head*, which was covered..."

    This paragraph has been deleted.
    altalt
    No More Fantasy
    Fantasy · Retsag
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  • Iceknith
    Iceknith6mth
    Commented

    furthermore, I don't know if you meant "twister form" or "twisted shape"

    This paragraph has been deleted.
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    No More Fantasy
    Fantasy · Retsag
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  • Iceknith
    Iceknith6mth
    Commented

    I think you meant "replacing *it* with her..."

    This paragraph has been deleted.
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    No More Fantasy
    Fantasy · Retsag
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  • Iceknith
    Iceknith10mth
    Commented

    isn't it written like so: "that he gave up 2 turns"

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    No More Fantasy
    Fantasy · Retsag
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  • Iceknith
    Iceknith11mth
    Replied to Retsag

    Ye but like... A paper plane... C'mon...

    This paragraph has been deleted.
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    No More Fantasy
    Fantasy · Retsag
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  • Iceknith
    Iceknith11mth
    Commented

    I agree with you editor's thought: It is better that way

    Ch 182 At the mercy of yourself
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    No More Fantasy
    Fantasy · Retsag
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  • Iceknith
    Iceknith11mth
    Commented

    Ameless is just killing his eagle, treating him like that. Because every baby bird needs to be fed pre-chewed food, because they can't chew. So, if I was pointy and annoying, which I am, I would point out that Ameless would have to chew the worms before giving them to his eagle.

    This paragraph has been deleted.
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    No More Fantasy
    Fantasy · Retsag
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  • Iceknith
    Iceknith11mth
    Commented

    so, like ameless and his eagle have the same birthday. Wow, what a coincidence [img=thinking]

    Then, after one last push, the newborn emperor-eagle finished smashing his shell and broke free of the egg it had been growing in.
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    Fantasy · Retsag
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  • Iceknith
    Iceknith11mth
    Commented

    Such weak battery đŸ„±

    This paragraph has been deleted.
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    No More Fantasy
    Fantasy · Retsag
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  • Iceknith
    Iceknith1yr
    Commented

    Technia dimmention traveler confirmed ?

    -All that for what?! Just because he didn't like Techno !?" Rhetorically asked her son.
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    No More Fantasy
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  • Iceknith
    Iceknith1yr
    Commented

    At least he won the hide and seek. This ais a true alpha male in his prime ;)

    -I'll never let that happen." assertively stated the boy "You don't understand the pain I felt that day, when he went out to buy milk and never came back. I truly thought I'd lost him." explained Sansoul as he clenched his fist in frustration "But now I've found him, he was hiding in the wardrobe!"
    altalt
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  • Iceknith
    Iceknith1yr
    Replied to Retsag

    Oop, my bad 😁

    And before the boy could react a large red and white figure with a tall pointy red hat and an incredibly large brown bag that seemed to be containing a thousand gifts barged in and shouted:
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    No More Fantasy
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  • Iceknith
    Iceknith1yr
    Commented

    "the *old* tower"

    And before the boy could react a large red and white figure with a tall pointy red hat and an incredibly large brown bag that seemed to be containing a thousand gifts barged in and shouted:
    altalt
    No More Fantasy
    Fantasy · Retsag
    detail