OakFlame
G'day, mates! Just a dude who likes books.
Writing
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Interesting start with a lot of mystery. I enjoyed the transition after the first chapter. Writing quality- didn't notice any errors, solid. Updates- remains to be seen, but hopefully will be consistent! Story- I'm very interested right now. Some spooky stuff has been happening, and I'm looking forward to how the Raven will deal with it. Character design- Interesting so far, enough to keep me hooked. I'm anticipating their future development! World background- Probably my favorite part so far, it is an interesting and uncommon setting. In the future, there's magic, and there's spooky stuff. I like it!
odd turn, didn't expect this :p
riveting odd word to use
That’s a lot
The style is great. It’s the perfect mix of easy to read and riveting detail. It’s almost like I can feel the environment and experiences, and everything flows smoothly. It is neither bulky nor choppy, and is quite pleasant to read. Story: I can’t really think of a better way to start world building. There are no info dumps, but we steadily learn about the world, with small details mixed into action in a perfect blend. Motivation. Development. Feelings. Right from the start, it’s clear that the author hasn’t forgotten to make this part of the story just as good as the rest. I can’t speak much yet for side characters, but even in just the first few chapters, we know what motivates the protagonist, and get hints at events that might change his goals in the future. Grammar- Flawless. I don’t believe I noticed a single error throughout. Notes: This story has a lot of potential to develop into a masterpiece, and I know that the author has enough experience to put that potential to use. I’ve read a few of their other works on other platforms, and I think this is an improvement from their already good novels I’ve read in the past!
I haven't really had a sense of time at all. Each trial has only lasted a chapter, feels really short. Like bro is speedrunning these things.
bro is edgy af
I am getting a bit tired of this right now- I don't know much about Orion's character itself yet, just what he has experienced. Dude has suffered a lot, and the previous 5 chapters have just been him suffering more. Give me some stakes or make me care about him, would keep my interest more.
hm, am curious about this