Thanatos0925

I just don’t get it like if someone I knew and trusted did something like lied for a long time I would at least try to get an explanation I would demand one. I wouldn’t just go you lied and run off it makes no sense I would need closure something almost none of these people asked for or got it makes no sense to me. Ok yeah Jay lied why did he lie and what did he accomplish with his lying makes them all look stupid. While yes I understand high emotions and yes feeling hurt he lied they immediately started trusting what doom said and asked no clarifying questions. Like literally it was you lied to us and it only had positive consequences for us personally so therefore we cannot even give you the courtesy of asking why before turning on you.

I am just confused on what the goal is here for the presence. Like when asked how to get a vessel that would hold him the presence gives silence yet to complete a quest the mc doesn’t really even want to do or care about besides getting the presence attention suddenly there is a way given. Why couldn’t the presence just made this quest the way to get a vessel then the mc wouldn’t be frustrated and severely mistrustful of the presence. If there was going to be a quest anyway why wait till the mc heavily dislikes you and wants nothing to do with you and instead just give the quest when asked in the first place.

If not for a few glaring problems this would be amazing rather than just ok. Firstly every single character, main, supporting, or background is dumber than a box of rocks even the mc who is constantly stated to be super smart is always acting stupid. Secondly it’s like instead of naturally developing the story and characters the author decided what they wanted to happen and took as many crazy logical leaps to get there as it took even if it makes little to no sense. Just like most stories like this instead of writing people of at least average intelligence and trying to develop the story naturally over time the author takes the less interesting, more annoying path of super dumb people with no consistent logic.

Most people know stealing is wrong but I guess not everyone has the ability to think things through

I wanted to like this story so much because the premise was very interesting to me however even after giving it more chances than I should have I just cannot like it. There are two main reasons a too constantly self aware protagonist and a constant unrealistic story plot point. The protagonist is constantly referencing cliches and his “protagonist aura” which is only funny/interesting when used sparsely at best. As for the plot point they go to this academy which the uber powerful headmistress is “preparing them for the real world” but the set up of how she does that is so unrealistic I cringe every time it’s mentioned. You don’t throw people into terrible conditions and underfeed them while having just joined your academy. To actually prepare them you teach them the tools to overcome those challenges and then maybe put them in a ranked situation. The system isn’t prepping for the real world is forcing people to quit for no good reason when they haven’t even been taught how to succeed yet.

I just don’t get the reaction everyone has to this like I guess I missed some character development but there seems no way Lux would be happy practically drugging someone to sleep with him. I know he didn’t do the drugging but he still wouldn’t like it. Unless his character is vastly different from what it has been so far he also seems like he would be devastated to sleep with someone without iris and cai knowing about it at least. Plus all this happening with Valerie a sheltered child who doesn’t know what the world is like enough to be asking for this all these relationships being forced to start due to drug induced psychosis feels like a cop out and it’s disgusting to me. Who would be happy that their relationship began because they were drugged wether they wanted the relationship to happen in the first place doesn’t matter. I guess I am just disappointed the author would write basically r*pe cause that’s what this is for all parties involved including Lux none of them are in a state to consent.

First off the story is well written and has a very interesting way of being told tell. But, sigh I am sad why does every story that has a really cool premise always have a main character surrounded by tons of misunderstandings. It’s never oh they gain cool powers or a awesome patron now let’s get started they always gain a bad rep. People think poorly of them and they have to hide their abilities though admittedly sometimes for good reason. So personally I am just tired of the use of that trope if that doesn’t bother you it’s a good story so far as I have read and maybe I’ll return once I am less exhausted by the constant misunderstanding story device.

Hiding all but the first handful of chapters behind a paywall disheartening and possibly illegal. It’s a very interesting concept but looking ahead and seeing how it’s only on patreon makes not only me turn away from it but will likely turn away many readers who would have been willing to pay for a few chapters in advance. If you’re making the money you want from doing it this way good for you I suppose but a much wider audience could be reached to pay for your writing by posting it freely then charging for advanced chapters.

Hope to see it return it was such a good story, very unique as well.

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