While I was a bit put off by the heavy swearing at first, I couldn't help but be absorbed right back into the story. While the pacing is fast, it's not too fast that you can't keep up and a balance is achieved between the excitement and the exposition. Would love to see it continued.

Have you removed a few paragraphs? It seems like you did. After saying "The world has changed...", Jakes suddenly says "Why not?" as if in reply to someone but he was the only one who said anything in the previous paragraph. Please make sure to take note of the changes you were making to your story. It might leave a huge plothole down the line.

Other than a few grammatical errors and a few improvements needed on sentence structure, it holds up fine. However, the conversation between Jakes and his mother feels a bit stiff and unnatural. And like what the other comments had said, a bit more descriptions about the surroundings could really build the scene. It'd be pretty hard for us to imagine how a scene looks like if we don't have some descriptions to go from.