plexxie_96

Interesting concept but if you’re going for spirit of vengeance don’t make the dude so wimpy. He has been attacked multiple times now with no response other then anger at being murdered. Get him standing up for himself pretty quickly or this will get boring fast.

Dude I’m enjoying it so far but the relationship stuff is getting boring at this point just pull the trigger on a haram or set him up with someone. To have a hundred chapters of relationship building for mc to turn around and say he ain’t interested in a relationship is pretty weak

Every good barber has a 911, don’t know why but it seems to be a thing

+1 stick to what you have and expand from here. It’s good so far don ’t make to much work for yourself.

throuple then, The real world is a strange place and what are you going to do completely change the story and throw missy in sooner or maybe have pennyxoc and later they pull missy in to spice thing up a little. Dude if open relationships are a thing why not this. Also you just spend most of a chapter explaining there sexcapades then had penny uncomfortable on what was basically a forced date with Lenord. The story has already started to go in the pennyxoc direction. Do you really want to try reshape what’s already there to basically do a ocxoc fanfic in big bang theory.

Dude if people want to read it but you thinks it’ too cringy, either do something else or rewrite it to be less cringey, you are a different person to when you started this don’t force yourself to be that person for people on the internet.

Enjoying it so far but would appreciate if you tried up the pace a bit at leas until they move to forks. Also cool idea would be Jin more cobra Kai.

This story would be easier to read if you gave the character a name, I don’ t personally understand the appeal of y/n stuff.

This is stolen from Pandora’s reader on ff.net

Who cares what he’s wearing when people can just picture what they want. You do you, this is your story that I assume your writing for your self at the end of the day.