Graye

Not a professional critic, just a normal dude that likes quality writing. I won’t lie. I’m from the Arcane hype train. So when this popped, I was intrigued by the template system concept. When the author said from the start that he was the “best R18 writer”, my attention was received. But then I realized the absolute word vomit that was the chapters and stopped. Chapters are short. Think of that clip of Mickey Mouse having a poor dinner with Donald Duck and Goofy, where he is cutting off a slice of a slice of bread. Each chapter is a paper thin slice of a slice of bread. Lots of run on sentences and chunky paragraphs. Cue the “word vomit” comment. For foreign/English second language readers, you may have an easier time. For native/first language readers, you might turn blind. These already gave me some red flags for the future R-18. I came for the horny gold, but I am fearful of the horny bait fool’s gold. Finally, the title of each chapter plus comments about Patreon. I was made aware that this seems to be a writer-for-hire/patreon-prone author. I’ve seen reassurances, but I’m honestly skeptical. Read at your own caution, for fear of a pay-locked fanfic. That being said, to prospective readers, give it a try. Maybe it is your cup of tea. To the sigma grinder author, I respect the money gain. Everyone has to make their own bread.

For what it is worth, I’ve been enjoying this fic. Despite all the English language errors and slight discrepancies of canon, I’ve enjoyed the pacing well, and the interaction of the characters with MC. I look forward to more system involvement, even if it is more of a backseat role. Good luck with your current situation. I look forward to your homecoming.

Heads Up: I stopped at Chapter 42. Some things I may not be fully aware of. System fics have been an up-and-coming trend as of late, especially in WN. I personally enjoy it quite a lot. Yet, this fanfic falls under the category that some amateur system fics fall into: the system is so OP that it gets boring real quick. There are few OP system fics that work well. Unfortunately, this fic isn’t really one of them. It isn’t bad, but it isn’t great. There are no epic fights, only absolutely concise stompings. Nothing is particularly descriptive, it almost feels like you are reading without personality. Furthermore, the MC keeps getting benefits after benefits without any direction. Tack on the fact that he enters various worlds without any obstacles to further his development, and we can read this like a slice of life summary novel. But like I said, this isn’t the worst novel. The writing quality and grammar is good. The chapters, although boring, feel substantial from a word count perspective. It is just that it feels like there is no substance to what I’m except for seeing an OP MC becoming even more OP such that the greatest threats are merely ants to MC’s golden pinky. I remain hopeful for the author’s future because the writing quality is good. I just would like to implore them to consider the world, the characters, and the progression more when writing their story. And also, why did you have to kill off my favorite character in RWBY so dirty like that? Gone in a paragraph, no buildup, no nothing, just poof.

NOICE