Moe_Cyan_Pile
I am an author that writes at Webnovel and Wattpad. Discord here - https://discord.gg/2zWeRad
Writing
of reading
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Hello. Moe here. I won't be sweet talking since I'd like to give out a honest opinion on this. My overall total score for this would be a 3.0. As stated by the others, the writing quality... simply just ruins it a lot. Improper placements of periods, comas, exclamations, and the like. Grammar problems and sentence structure being all over the place. I'm telling this now, even Grammarly won't save this. The reason is simple. the writing style that is seemed to be here would be something like akin to that of a script. When one reads a script, it would often be stiff. Because it is written with the intention to perform, not to read. This is like that in a lot of cases. A quick suggestion to fix this is to read other people's works first. See how it is written, structured, and styled. After that, try to implement it to your work. then compare. Another reason why i said that Grammarly may not even save it is because, based on where you want to place your writing. It appears to be a mix of first person and third person. And as Grammarly stands, it sucks at recognizing that. With that point done the other points can then follow suite. Since the writing quality is the main issue. If that has a problem, story development, character design, and world background then get's affected. Overall souring the reader's experience and causing them to may drop the work for another. If that can be fixed, then my rating may change. But for now, it stands to stay on this number.
English and Grammar is appropriate. Minimum errors on all current chapters which is good. As it does not have that much chapters, an appropriate review for plot, character, and world background would not be given. However, for a beginning, it would be overall be better than an good amount of works already. Keep up the good work. Happy writing!
thank you for noticing this error
I'll be honest with you. that was the third time I updated it already
if I have a penny for every task my school gives me, I'd be rich. also, my current major is business and accounting. I have what I need but time. I'm so pathetic. however at most. I'll punch through dates and drop a lot on the start of 2022. though it'll be mostly wattpad first. and then a week later, webnovel
thanks for noticing.
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This version is abandoned since i wrote this out of being a hobby. a new one is being written without having the same inconsistencies you mentioned. thanks for those though since i sometimes miss them. (new version is not published) (wattpad has 2 chapters) (set 1)
oi. it's author-san