Webnovelavatar
0
Ciel_Dan

Ciel_Dan

Lv4

/ᐠ。ꞈ。ᐟ\

2019-08-21 JoinedVietnam
118.6h

of reading

59

Read books

Badges6

Moments

130
  • Ciel_Dan
    Ciel_Dan1d
    Commented

    Thx for the chapter :>

    Ch 20 Broken**
    alt
    My New Life as a Catgirl
    LGBT+ · WritingSimulator
    detail
  • Ciel_Dan
    Ciel_Dan1d
    Commented

    Bone~ ^w^

    Ch 28 Chapter 28: You reek go shower!?
    alt
    The Tale Of Kitsuna
    Fantasy Romance · TheRealSkollie
    detail
  • Ciel_Dan
    Ciel_Dan3d
    Commented

    Thanks for the chapter ^w^

    Ch 27 Chapter 27: Meeting my Grandmother
    alt
    The Tale Of Kitsuna
    Fantasy Romance · TheRealSkollie
    detail
  • Ciel_Dan
    Ciel_Dan4d
    Commented

    Red flag coming

    I had no idea what the two demon lords planned, but I did have a hunch that this banquet might not end quietly. I only hoped they would not involve me in their schemes.
    alt
    My New Life as a Catgirl
    LGBT+ · WritingSimulator
    detail
  • Ciel_Dan
    Ciel_Dan5d
    Commented

    How about RT-2PM2 Topol-M cold launched three-stage self propellent silo based intercontinental ballistic missile. Guarantee to win any chess game!

    -Something else?
    alt
    The Tale Of Kitsuna
    Fantasy Romance · TheRealSkollie
    detail
  • Ciel_Dan
    Ciel_Dan6d
    Commented

    *Happy noise!* OwO

    Ch 18 Carriage Ride
    alt
    My New Life as a Catgirl
    LGBT+ · WritingSimulator
    detail
  • Ciel_Dan
    Ciel_Dan7d
    Commented

    Nice chaps ^w^

    Ch 25 Chapter 25: Stacys pass 4
    alt
    The Tale Of Kitsuna
    Fantasy Romance · TheRealSkollie
    detail
  • Ciel_Dan
    Ciel_Dan9d
    Commented

    Thanks for the chapter ^w^

    Ch 17 Etiquette
    alt
    My New Life as a Catgirl
    LGBT+ · WritingSimulator
    detail
  • Ciel_Dan
    Ciel_Dan11d
    Commented

    back to present tense

    He turned and I followed his gaze standing there was a woman dressed in black, a cloak over her face she speaks in a language I cannot understand but seems familiar all the same I can't place it no matter how hard I try.
    alt
    My Life as a tamed monster
    Fantasy Romance · lightace19
    detail
  • Ciel_Dan
    Ciel_Dan11d
    Commented

    Back to past tense...

    I take another look at my surroundings and to my surprise a man standing 10 ft from me with a child in his arms I do not know where he came from, I swore he wasn't there before.
    alt
    My Life as a tamed monster
    Fantasy Romance · lightace19
    detail
  • Ciel_Dan
    Ciel_Dan11d
    Commented

    "the destruction unimaginable"->"the destruction is unimaginable"

    Thunder, fire, water, and Earth being cast at one another causing great turmoil among the ranks it's pure chaos the destruction unimaginable but what strikes me as odd is that I can see a hint of color not belonging to those elements, upon one side I could see that the magic has a gold color to it, where the other has a almost black with a deep red to it.
    alt
    My Life as a tamed monster
    Fantasy Romance · lightace19
    detail
  • Ciel_Dan
    Ciel_Dan11d
    Commented

    Why does the sentence have the question mark?

    It's hard to remember what was I doing?
    alt
    My Life as a tamed monster
    Fantasy Romance · lightace19
    detail
  • Ciel_Dan
    Ciel_Dan11d
    Commented

    ... Author, try not to switch present simple and past tense so much in paragraphs, it's a pain to read. After finishing the chapter, you should spend some minutes scanning for mistakes in paragraphs like these, I have seen you switching between them for a while now.

    Despite the pain I was feeling I take a look at Aries face and what I see is pure sadness and the small tear going down her face she then notices me looking and gives me a small smile before disappearing in a column of light.
    alt
    My Life as a tamed monster
    Fantasy Romance · lightace19
    detail
  • Ciel_Dan
    Ciel_Dan11d
    Commented

    "terrifying feel about her", you are looking for "aura"

    The other stood in front of me and while she was equally as beautiful she had a very terrifying feel about her, she wore a full set of black armor with spikes on it and crimson red hair that almost seemed as if it was on fire her eyes were black with red irises and she stared at me with a mixture of fondness and disgust I couldn't quite place it.
    alt
    My Life as a tamed monster
    Fantasy Romance · lightace19
    detail
  • Ciel_Dan
    Ciel_Dan11d
    Commented

    "a silver sword at her side" I think you are trying to say "waist".

    One figure stood in front of Tayla she was a jaw-dropping beauty, she wore a silver dress with a gold breast plate and jewelry and a silver sword at her side she had beautiful silver hair and blue eyes and I swore she looked familiar but I just couldn't place it.
    alt
    My Life as a tamed monster
    Fantasy Romance · lightace19
    detail
  • Ciel_Dan
    Ciel_Dan11d
    Commented

    "...standing before the light no not standing before coming from," I-I had no idea what you are trying to say.

    I had to shield my eyes for a second but I couldn't help but notice two figures standing before the light no not standing before coming from, with the surprises of this world never cease I was just born today for God's sake.
    alt
    My Life as a tamed monster
    Fantasy Romance · lightace19
    detail
  • Ciel_Dan
    Ciel_Dan11d
    Commented

    "take a knee" -> "kneel" "Bowser" -> "bow"

    Tayla takes a knee in front of the priestess and Bowser her head as the priestess begins to chant in a language I can't even begin to comprehend or understand it all sounds like a garbled mess to me kind of grading on the ears I look around and I see that everybody else seems to be paying close attention to what she's saying so maybe it's just me you can't understand her.
    alt
    My Life as a tamed monster
    Fantasy Romance · lightace19
    detail
  • Ciel_Dan
    Ciel_Dan11d
    Commented

    "witch" -> "which". Damn autocorrect

    To witch she does and I stick to her side since I figured that's what I'm supposed to do.
    alt
    My Life as a tamed monster
    Fantasy Romance · lightace19
    detail
  • Ciel_Dan
    Ciel_Dan11d
    Commented

    Try not to write long sentence, use "." more often please. Using too many "and" is not great, it is recommended to split the sentences.

    As we make our way inside the castle we go up many flights of stairs and I do mean a lot and quite frankly I'm very tired I wish she could pick me up but I noticed that I happen to be the size of a fully grown German Shepherd so that's something I wonder how big I'll actually get, so with that thought I set aside we finally make it inside her room and she asks me to to stand aside while she changes into her garb there are two maids here waiting for her and as soon as they see her the great her as your highness I guess that's her proper horrific and as I think about that a sudden thought hits me and I can't help but ask.
    alt
    My Life as a tamed monster
    Fantasy Romance · lightace19
    detail
  • Ciel_Dan
    Ciel_Dan11d
    Commented

    "they're"->"there're"

    Making our way there we pass through several courtyards including what I assume is some kind of training ground since they're dummies and people playing with swords there, it's nice to confirm that this is the dark ages but whatever I guess I won't be playing any video games anytime soon.
    alt
    My Life as a tamed monster
    Fantasy Romance · lightace19
    detail