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NeftaroWruter

NeftaroWruter

Lv3

Just your average writer.

2019-05-09 JoinedUnited States
35.1h

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  • NeftaroWruter
    NeftaroWruter3yr
    Posted

    The story was honestly quite the charm, especially at the actions scenes, along with the characters in these scenes. The changing of the concise, descriptive and poetic writing are all intertwined pretty decently. And it earns a 8/10 for me~

    altalt
    Kyanite
    Sci-fi · Raethyn
    detail
  • NeftaroWruter
    NeftaroWruter3yr
    Posted

    After finishing the second book, here is what I got to say on this review for you author.BTW this one is a long one,so take your time. Pros: Characters:I really like the few new characters introduced, mainly derick, and two of the female wolf members, mainly Luna and the one that turns to the alpha or whatever. They had a nice progression to their arcs by their choices  and consequences that brought resolutions that felt bitter but inevitable by their journey within the story's.Not to mention the some of the side characters have their journey, mainly the dpk bois, guinevere and philip(However is arc felt rather off, but I'll elaborate later on.) Dialogue:The dialogue felt at least still decent much like the previous stories, given I could know at least who was talking(though I sometimes get confused), but still something I enjoyed, for the most part at least. Tension:The tension though slow, was at least getting pretty nice once it got to the moments of conflict, from small to large and threatening, not to mention the resolutions of said conflicts, both good and bad made the action entertaining especially in the battle scene. However, I still have my gripes of this story, which still prevalent, and these are. Cons Villains:Honestly, the villains fell one note, like really not that great, of course, they were some that completed a very decent role to cause conflict(Seth) but still felt like not that good in terms of characters, he was pretty annoying, but the way he was ended also felt anticlimactic(Not to say I was not waiting for it to happen tho),  yet mostly felt too evil without a reason just because the story needed a conflict of sorts. Then there is the senjin and honestly, he just basically  your basic villain that will take over the earth and stuff, nothing that surprising Characters:Some characters were mostly dare and were irrelevant, though this is also given you created a many cast of characters but some of them were developed well. Which now I want to get to phillip arcs, in which had everything pretty nice, the tension and mystery as well to a little about the world building.However it was unnecessary, and I mean that not that it t was taken out it would make no chance but rather it could have been better as another side story of sorts to another book, given his story felt out of the main story but could have worked better as a further content you could have added on a later book(If you were going to do so.) Worldbuilding:The world building got some things right at explaining parts to the story of the wolf and also the new hidden species roaming around, not to mentioned that elemental magic stuff was weird, but not much felt odd at first.It was until then that i was puzzled about how it did this magic system work precisely, as I know is affected by the race and emotions, but I still cannot understand something's of it, like do all the species possess such capabilities of magic or only some of the ranks of higher powers and such, though perhaps I haven't paid much attention to such details, which reminds me of a another very prevalent issues I stumble upon. Writing: The writing needs a little more work, both in execution of information and details of actions(Dialogue tags).The information parts I'm talking about is the constant infodumping, like is not that bad as the first, but is very present that I sometimes could not fully process all the information without getting confused or bored, so practicing not infodumping and developed yout details part by part, otherwise you gonna get some lost in the info. Speaking of details, these were kinda overused in the sense they extended info and dialogue with not much necessary value(Mainly on the dialogue tags), don't go overboard and over explain okay?.However, the writing still has its part  combined somewhat well with the other mentioned components of story and characters, but still needs refining, is decent to put it simply. Sorry for the long review author,

    altalt
    Hunters Moon Black & White
    Fantasy · SaberTrueno86
    detail