KumThrone
Un-Apologetic.
Writing
of reading
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First we nerf the MC, Then we disregard the MC in exchange of Creative lore dumps in the form of a story. Is this about the First Soul, or about The War in Heaven? Quite frankly, Are we even needing the MC at this point? What's special about him now? THE God thrown away into a mere C'Tan Prototype body. What now? Are we going to follow his "Oh SO FABULIOUS" adventures across the universe HE made? Sure he can Manipulate the warp, Woo-di-doo... And that changes what? He practically lost his place/And anything special once you nerfed him.
Mandalore, Its a great starting place. Full of Fit Warriors and Cultures so diverse that it's almost natural.
Was it necessary to kill Morgan? I get the theme and all, but like its our favorite boi morgan.
Also, Please keep up the good work. I do not mean to discourage you. You are by far another great 40k Writer, just the divation urked me.
And before you say ANYTHING, EVERY guardsman in a regiment that regularly fights the forces of CHAOS knows not to speak its name, nor it's false gods. That goes especially for Kriegsmen. Let's not even get into why a WATCHMASTER of all things is just spewing out Imperium knowledge to an unknown faction/group of Humans/Mutants and Xenos alike. At first, you had the Krieg mindset to a T, Now you are diverting from it... Making the Krieg… Well not even Krieg anymore, They may be "Your" Krieg, but not the Canon Krieg.
And dropped. Ruined the Krieg in this book. Sigh, onto the next.
Alrighttt, I can tell this is for the more smart people of webnovel... so I'm going to head out. I can barely keep up with any of this without getting confused. Mmm yes, I announced my departure.
How bout you go into his shoes in a High pace action scene? Hes only human after all.
I HAVE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS DAY!
You sir just won the world, And made me dump this dumpster fire.