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I will try to be fair. I didn't want to just give this one star because it doesn't deserve such a low rating. That said, here it goes. I only reached ch40. The major hook for me was the author's alchemy ideas and the fact he made boosted gear work on boosting the potions. That's an amazing idea. The problem is that the author is hell-bent on keeping the MC weak. The MC had a pill capable of enhancing his body, yet, he never used it to grow stronger. Why? Because the author wanted to have a reason to make MC into a devil. Which is dumb. The major hook for me was that the MC seemed to not want to become a devil. After all, he had a cheat that SHOULD make him into the most valuable/dangerous guy around. But then ch40 came and the author decided to just piss on 39 chaters of proclaiming that the MC can go and make his own path. Very dumb idea. Another problem with the MC is that he is a genuinely retarded person. He expects people to respect him but he doesn't give them any reason for it. He can make fertility potions which would make many powerful factions salivate. But he never really showed his ability to do so to anyone. As far as everybody knows, the MC is just a promising alchemist who can make potions that can cure minor cuts. Yet, for some reason, the MC expects people to kowtow to him for that. It's mind-bogglingly stupid what this author is doing. If the MC just showed his ability to make fertility potions to every faction at once, and make them available to them, he would become untouchable because any faction willing to harm him would instantly come under attack from his other customers. He would have become the most valuable piece on the board. Most fics with fertility potions have the MC already a part of a faction when he reveals them. But this MC was natural. He had a way to flip the board. Have leaders send whatever woman, resource, bodyguard, and knowledge he wants to him for his fertility potions. It wouldn't even matter how weak he is. The second they discover they can't replicate his potions, he would become too important to harm. As for forceful recruitment? The same thing as killing him. His every other customer would literally declare war against anybody who tried it. It wouldn't be worth it for any faction to be forceful with MC as long as the potions are freely available for purchase. You can bet your a*s that Sirzechs would have been very polite to MC if he knew this tidbit. But instead, we have a psychotic, retarded, teenage manchild who thinks he is the next big G and expects everybody to respect him when he gave them no reason to do so. Hell, I'd even say that he got tricked into joining devils, limiting his potential influence with other races, because unless he has a way to mind control or enslave Grayfia, then her being his servant does not matter. She would just smack him the second he wants to do anything perverted to her the same way she smacks Sirzechs when he slacks off. The fact that Sirzechs did not evaporate the MC the second he asked for Grayfia to serve him is a pure wish fulfillment of this MC. The MC is definitely NOT the only option somebody like Sirzechs would have. And his loved ones are Sirzechs' reverse scale. It is another retarded decision this author made because he was thinking with his lower head and wanted to introduce something trashy like NTR because he is a trash human being. In doing so, he basically nerfed Sirzechs and Grayfia's INT stat to single digits to make his MC whose INT stat is at a permanent 10 value seem impressive in comparison. It is a kinda pathetic approach to writing, tbh. It made me disappointed in the story. I usually do not write reviews. Even when a story makes me truly angry. This one I write because I am just... disappointed. This MC and his position as a neutral human alchemist with fertility potions had so much potential that when the author completely pissed on it by not allowing his MC to use his cheat to become stronger or make himself literally the MVP for the majority of supernatural races, that it just made me disappointed. Because what did this author do instead? He made his MC into another devil slave. Is it temporary? I dunno. And I don't care. My expectations for this MC and author just evaporated. ... That said, it is not a bad read overall. The ideas are interesting at least. The MC's personality is also interesting, at least when he is not acting like a total psycho with nerfed intelligence. Anyway, this is my opinion. The author will have his reader base. But with what he did in ch40, I guarantee you he had lost at least 30% of it right there. The MC could have just given Rias some elixir to strengthen her or a potion to defeat Riser (maybe the agony one). Or something. However, the author showed his lack of creativity. Because naturally the alchemist is not allowed to give his friend his products to easily get out of her problems and gain her undying affections. Oh no, there must be some retarded childish psycho drama that shows the MC and leaders of major factions have less IQ than elementary schoolers otherwise it would not be 'entertaining', right?.
Yeah, relationships should never be something 'forced' by a 'system'. It just cheapens the whole premise so much. It never improves the story. Dunno why it is so hard for people to understand this exceedingly simple fundamental thing. I think we are just built differently. More superior, lol.
Nah. Only an idiot would think he would do it. The reason why Sirzechs joined the Civil War in the first place was that some of his friends were killed (I think it was some commoner low-class devil kids he taught music or something?). He is a lot like Rias in that he cherishes bonds and relationships. He would not accept this deal. This is literally the guy's reverse scale. In fact, an offer like this is pretty much one of the very few things that could set him off and go all 'Destructo' on MC's a*s. The only reason why he accepts is that the author wants the NTR to happen so he is making him far too OOC. You are also overestimate MC's importance. Sirzechs can always just kill him, reincarnate him, and order him around. Because what is the MC really going to do? The Evil Piece would make him into a stray devil if he disobeys enough for Sirzechs to get angry and sure, the devils would lose potions but so what? It would still be the same as before. Ajuka could definitely cook up some slavery magic for MC if he misbehaved. As for his shield in Grigory? That's BS. Grigory did nothing when Barakiel's wife was killed. They did nothing when Barakiel's daughter was made into a devil. Sure, Azazel would be angry a bit. But some reparations would make that all better. After all, Azazel too needs to think like a leader and put his faction first. The Peace would NOT be at risk just for the MC. That's the author's overinflated ego speaking. His MC is NOT as important as he imagines him to be. Especially since the MC has not shown anything truly juicy to anyone yet, Sure, he can do fertility potion but they DON'T KNOW THAT. The MC wants to be taken seriously but he did not really show his worth to anybody yet. His potions can cure minor cuts? Oh my gosh! How revolutionary! Everybody should postrate in front of him, rite bois!? Yeah, no. The MC is just an id*ot.
Yea are wrong. 1 ryo = 10 yen. So, 10 Ryo = 1 dollar.
Nah. This is a prime example of Chinese math.
Typical Chinese protag, lol.
If you know you are not good at it, why tf are you still trying to do it? You have talent for writing. You clearly have a plan and a plot in mind. Your characters are okay. There is no major flaw other than... you portray your MC as a total ret*rd due to your attempts at foreshadowing. I saw this in my library and decided to try rereading it and it's only ch5 and I am already on the verge of dropping this garba...ahem. The sad part is that it would have been a great read if it wasn't so fkin frustrating to see this id*ot MC fumble his way through the plot with less finesse than Fudge! It's just a painful to read it. Please, don't do this in your future works. You probably lost quite a few readers, not because your writing is bad, but because you choose to make it very annoying to read your story.
A way to become Merlintama?
Dudes are legit arguing about power levels of characters set by fans on wiki that is ALSO written by fans. Holy sheet, somebody could go there, set Ophis as one of the lower ranks and these idiots would believe it and argue for it. It's funny.
Nah. Your writing quality definitely deserves more. You write well. Your ideas and execution though? Yeah, I kinda agree with this guy. You are trying too damn hard to have a unique insane MC that he just turns into an uninteresting edgy protag who is kinda doing dumb shit. It is just my opinion but I don't find that very appealing. Then again, you will definitely have some people liking it. So good luck with your writing.