Yeah, but the problem with having Sapphire reveal everything, even to a relatively trusted character without any impulse is that it makes it feel unnatural. Especially if it just ends up being an info dump where every bit of exposition is just piled on at that point. To make it work there needs to be an understandable reason why the Sapphire wants to of has to speak up. Its sort of how in cannon Blake only revealed that she was a member of the white fang because her emotions got the better of her.

Yeah, I get that. For me too this has gone on longer that I would have liked, but I also just don't want to end up like a lot of other stories on this sight and just gloss over character parts of the story and just skip to the 'fun' parts. Don't worry too mush though, this chunk is almost over, and the story will move on to something else.

:)

"Ninjas of Love" is what it was called, yes.

Tell me about it. I don't understand how people become early birds.

Translation: "I pledge my soul to the great goddess to grant me the power to slay all in my path."

Translation: "none shall survive the spider's wrath."

Translation: "all creatures shall be enthralled in our dark web."

Translation: "The night shadows within behind the mark of the ancients."

Translation: "we are the hunters of the universe,"

Translation: "Strength leads to anger."

Now the immersion concerns are valid. There's no other way to put it, and it's my fault if the way I wrote something affected your immersion. A narrator is a tool to either build the world or guide the reader. There are no rules as to how something should be done, no cookie cuter 'this is how it should be,' no, It is only written in a way for it to fulfill the purpose it was designed for, and if it was unable to do that then it is my fault as an amateur writer. 'Using our view pans over Vale here' Is a way of me equating your point of view to the narrator's point of view while simultaneously separating them. You are not the narrator, and neither am I. I am not talking directly to you. If I were, I wouldn't have written it this way. The narrator is simply 'Guiding' in a sense. It is taking you're POV and guiding it through a set path. I was trying to exhibit the start of the first episode of RWBY where the POV pans all over the city while voices talk in the background. This is a fanfic after all. To say, that you should "never ever" be hinted at is simply close minded. There are no rules of that nature when it comes to creative writing, and while I understand that to be your opinion, I will have to disagree. Weather for comedic affect or storytelling, there are plenty of times where doing so would be valid. As far as your suspension of disbelief and breaking the fourth wall, I didn't write 'So, here you are walking through Vale,' no, I didn't. 'You' are not being addressed; what you view is. I have never heard the augment of Suspension of Disbelief coming from the side of the reader, but I see your point. If I were to write something that is completely out of place, the reader would not be able to suspend their disbelief and believe that it happened in the story, but I don't believe I pushed that far. The art of subtlety is not lost on me, but it is not the only writing tactic. Like I stated earlier, there are no right answers when it comes to writing, and there are no 'cookie-cutter' rules outside of grammar. Even then, definitions of words are more flexible than people tend to believe. I understand your concerns, but I do not believe myself to be wrong in the way that I wrote this chapter.

I understand what you mean, but you are missing the point. Words in a story are more than just their definition. I am using the medium of writing to guide your imagination somewhere, hence your viewpoint. I am using sight here as a way of showing you what is happening, and you are taking context out of the meaning of words, and context and connotation carry more than half of the words meaning. I mean no offence; You just are refusing to see a story as anything more than the sum of its parts.

I'm back, and everything was sorted out fine, thanks.

Come on, have some imagination.

fixed

Though it is true though. It's the only way I can see suck scrawny characters like Qrow, fight like they are super-human. As well as the other super-human feats people make without using their semblances.

*made me smile

Yeah, I had a plan to go back in time a bit with a different perspective at this point, and that ended up with this chapter being that short. In hindsight, I should've put this at the end of the previous chapter, but doing so at this point would just cause unnecessary confusion.

I am a student of two conflicting ideologies. Sleep is for the weak! And I need my beauty sleep.