Exp

Chapter 7 is the first time I have seen a comma placed in the story. yay!

Never shone should be never ‘shown’ shone is like lighting something up, shown is being presented To or as something.

Still reading just the beginning of the chapter, but gotta comment already. where are the comma’s in EVERY sentence. they seem to be missing. now it has been a long time since I have been in school, and I don’t know if it has changed or not. But shouldn’t there be a comma at every gap you would take a breath when normally speaking aloud, or shorter, to emphasize cetain things? I said my peace, so peace. [img=recommend]

Lol, 42. love the movie! Hilarious. a lot don’t though? Anyways to author-sama. If you read this, your pa treon link has been **************’d out again

Your screwed if you continued to read past the 18th chapter. In later parts it even begins to regress in quality.

it’s not really dislike, it’s mOre dissapointment bordering on hatred, and that’s already explained in my previous comments, so why ask? Reason being, for your refference. author lied about getting an editor, and in the beginning asked for help, I gave constructive criticism, and so did many others, and it was just ignored. the author Refuses to go back and fix prior mistakes in the work author should take PRIDE in. And cannot even remember who thier own characters are. throughout the wHole story, The author is paranoid, and states it so literally hundreds of times in the Story about his secRets. Especially about his bird, then after going to the capital with his family, lets his bird “grow” and takes his little siSter for a fucking tide, in the open city, for millions of people to see. you catch my meaning here? Don’t ask stupid Questions.

Loving the story still, keep it up man!

The fact is, you accused me of lying. the exact quote was “a big fat lie” then you preach to me, about not considering the authors circumstances. what right do you have to do so, to me, when you yourself are such a hypocrite? Secondly, it’s all a matter of asking for the right help, but the author chooses not to. not only that, but CHOOSES to ignore advice, not just from me, but everyone in the comments that chose to help. and thirdly, I have my own job and circumstances, wich I enjoy, why would I give up what I love to do, to work for some author I don’t know, that lies, and cheats people of Thier money, to give them crap,that the author themself probably isn’t proud of?

I and others have The right to comment. secondly, the author doesn’t accept constructive criticism, it’s ignored. thirdly it’s just a money grabbing sceme from the author, because despite 1000+ chapters, the quality gets worse, instead of improving. you need to take a chill pill, and face facts.

How so? The quality drops even as the story continues. the author lied about an editor, and if they really do have one they aren’t doing the job hired for? It could be so much better if the authore put in just even a little bit more effort. instead it’s just. get hurt, overcome pain, automatically be stronger while terribly describing how painful the mc’s training is. for 800 chapters I had read, that is literally THE ENTIRE PLOT. so how is it a lie?

Appreciate Your work. last chapter had a lot of choppy And unfonished sentences.

Too many errors in this chapter... did you proofread it? You said receipt instead of recipe at least 3 Times, the word form should be from? Your missing a ? Mark at the end of a sentence. and some of your paragraphs aRe mising words.

Dave handed him a small vile. The word should be “vial”

Lkeep it up! Funny characters as always!