Review Detail of ChaosInvoker in Xian Impact [OLD]

I'd grade the writing quality anywhere from B+ to A- approximately. No major grammatical errors, and the author's more than satisfactory command of English already places him miles ahead of at least half the other writers over here on WN. As for the story itself, reading this takes me back to the .hack franchise I used to love playing through (and watching) in my teens. Lastly, with regard to points for improvement? There's really not much I have on that end, considering what's already been written is already very good. The one bit of general advice I'd say applies here is to go back to your material and proofread it at least once or twice a month for any grammatical errors you may have missed at an earlier point. Well done overall.